On This Cross
by Shiny Ryuichi Sakuma
Summary: Before Voldemort, there was Tom Riddle. Harry is sent to the past in order to locate Voldemort’s weakness only to find himself falling in love…with Riddle. SLASH YAOI HPTR
1. Chapter One

Title: On this Cross

Disclaimers: Not Mine

Warning: Male x Male

Summary: Before Voldemort, there was Tom Riddle. Harry is sent to the past in order to locate Voldemort's weakness only to find himself falling in love...with Riddle.

Notes: Tom Riddle is out of character. I suppose. The only introspective we have dealing with Tom was when he was showing Harry the diary but...well...love at fist sight, maybe? J

_same old question  
without words  
so familiar  
seldom heard  
if I answer  
I confess  
I am only  
just a guess  
and with my eyes  
it's hard to see  
with my ears it's  
hard to believe that  
if I ever lose my will to live  
it was me that I could not forgive_

Over the Rhine - Moth

Chapter One

"You're insane," Harry chocked on his shock, gazing wide-eyed at Albus Dumbledore. "You want me to go to 1945 and _befriend_ Lord Voldemort?!" Bewildered, Harry shook his head. "Is this some sort of sick joke because if it is, I'm not laughing. In fact, I think you're completely off your rocker. I _met_ Tom Riddle and I have to say, I wasn't too impressed with him. What makes you think he'd even consider being my friend? From what I've been told, he was a haughty little bastard. Oh, and then there's the question as to _how_ I'm going to be able to go to 1945. Last time I checked, there weren't any time traveling devices created."

"Harry," Albus gently laid his hand on the youth's shoulder. "I know this is a heavy burden for you to bear. I would go myself but it's obvious why I cannot. I would send another student but you are the best. Your absence will be for three months, which, has already been explained to the students and the teachers. You are receiving intensive training outside of Hogwart's. You will spend those three months trying your best to befriend Tom Riddle and find his weaknesses so that that knowledge may be used against his future self. No one knows the truth but myself. This key," Albus held up an ordinary looking key, "Is your passage to the past. I've charmed it into bringing you back on December the 20th. At that time, even if you haven't accomplished your goal, you will return. Do you understand, Harry? This mission is extremely important and needs to be treated as such."

Harry sighed, nodding. "I understand, sir. What should happen if Voldemort attacks while I'm gone or better yet, what if Tom Riddle decides to kill me?"

"There is no need to think about it. Everything will be taken care of here. If Voldemort were to attack tomorrow, the Order could defend him but we need you to finish him. You should be leaving now. I wish you the best of luck. Hand this letter to my past self, he'll know what to do with it. You will be taken care of. Goodbye, Harry."

"Goodbye, Professor." Holding his breath, Harry grabbed the key and the letter. Eyes closed tightly, Harry felt nauseous and cold. Those feelings gave way to warmth and suddenly, he was falling into darkness. Unable to withstand the intense, erratic emotions swelling within him, he fainted into oblivion, the void swallowing him whole.

X X X

When Harry came to, he was lying on his back, staring at the ceiling of the headmaster's office. Blinking several times, Harry hoisted himself upon his elbows, gazing at his surroundings. This was definitely different. Nothing like Dumbledore's office, it was more...stately. Frowning, Harry patted himself to make sure that he was still in one piece and that vital organs were still in place. "Now, where the hell do I find Dumbledore?" he murmured. Shoving the key and the letter into the pockets of his trousers, Harry ignored the protesting voices in his head and exited the office.

It was exactly like the memory he was shown during second year. At least he knew his way around and thankfully the students were apparently in classes. Then a nagging thought entered Harry's mind. Wasn't Dumbledore a professor? If so, he would be teaching and Harry would be forced to wander around the school looking dazed and confused. "What are you doing out of class?" a condescending voice interrupted Harry's musings. He cringed, thinking of several good excuses. Pivoting, he nearly lost all composure. To think, the reason for his extensive traveling was standing before him, glaring at him. "Are you new? I haven't see you before."

Yes, that was definitely Tom Riddle. Just as he was in the diary... perfectly combed black hair, deep jade eyes with the slightest crimson glint to them, ivory flesh stretched across a tall, sculpted body that just screamed Quidditch player. "Yes, I was transferred from Beauxbatons to here. I honestly have no idea where I'm going." Grinning wanly, Harry bit back his initial reaction to hex the young man to oblivion but he had to keep up the pretense of friendliness.

Tom raised a dark brow. "You weren't given a tour by Headmaster Dippet? Who exactly _are_ you?"

"My name is Harold Wood but I prefer going by Harry," Harry lied perfectly. "Headmaster Dippet told me to go to a...Professor Dumbledore. Apparently, the headmaster's busy. Might I ask your name? It's only fair, after all."

"Tom Riddle." Tom regarded Harry intently for several seconds, green eyes never leaving Harry. "Professor Dumbledore is in classes right now. I see you've been sorted into Slytherin." Tom nodded towards the serpent badge on Harry's robe. "I can show you the Tower until the professor's finished. Don't just stand there or have you forgotten how to walk?" Tom inquired sarcastically. "You went to Beauxbatons? I would have figured you'd be in Gryffindor or Hufflepuff."

Harry curbed his initial reaction to defend Gryffindor, just a little confused as to why Tom Riddle was starting small talk. "Is there something wrong with those two Houses?" Harry innocently asked, walking beside of Riddle.

"No," Riddle simply stated. "Our Head of House if Professor Russe. She's quite interesting for a woman and of course, she plays favorites. Most of the professor's have their favorites. You might want to remember that around Professor Dumbledore." Riddle tucked his arms behind his head, stretching. Harry blinked, surprised that Tom Riddle could seem so human. Then again, this was before Riddle became fixated on purging the world of half-blood's and Muggles. "What year are you in?"

"Seventh," Harry answered without batting an eyelash. "Yourself?"

"The same. It's a little odd that you'd be transferred to Hogwart's with this being your last year." Emerald eyes suspiciously landed on Harry. "What sort of trouble did you cause to be sent here? Let me guess, you performed a killing curse on some hapless innocent?" Although the tone was light and teasing, Harry couldn't help but shiver.

"Nothing that drastic," Harry laughed. "My parents wanted me to expand my horizons a little so they sent me here on my own. I'll admit, I'm terrified." At least he was honest about that last declaration. He was frightened beyond his wildest dreams. Should he be discovered, there was the likelihood that Tom Riddle might skewer him over a pit of fire.

"There's no need to be scared," Tom chuckled and once again, Harry was gob smacked that this young man was the cruel bastard of the future. Unless Riddle was a master of disguise, that laugh had sounded almost real. "We aren't that evil to new students." Winking slyly, Tom murmured the password. "Serpentsortia. You might not want to say that with your wand poised to attack." Humor sparkled in the jade depths. "It might be an unpleasant experience."

"I'll remember that." Harry forced himself to close his mouth. This couldn't be Tom Riddle. Even in the diary, he'd been an arrogant prick. This young man...was hardly like that. "Why aren't you in class?" Harry found himself asking before he could stop himself.

"Oh, I don't have classes right now." Tom shrugged. "This is the Common Room. Not very impressive but we Slytherin's tend to stay by ourselves." Harry certainly found it remarkable. Silver and green was everywhere; the banners and the decorations to the color of the leather couches to the finely woven rugs on the floor. "We have House Pride, as you can tell. I don't think there are any free rooms available unless you don't mind sharing a bed with another boy."

"Well...I could stay down here," Harry did his best to not look uncomfortable.

"And Professor Russe would have your head." Riddle pursed his lips, thinking. Harry released a breath he hadn't been aware that he was holding. How did this _boy_ become the monster that was Lord Voldemort? He seemed normal and as much as Harry hated to admit it, Riddle was...kind. Perhaps it was only a mask that Riddle used to hide his true self. "As Head Boy, I have my own, private room. If you'd like, you can share it with me."

Harry knew he was ogling Riddle as if he were completely insane. "You don't even know me!"

"You look like you can be trusted, besides," Riddle's voice became deeper, "I doubt you'd try anything against me. You wouldn't appreciate the consequences." Harry shivered. That was the voice of Lord Voldemort. Just as quickly as the shift in personalities came, it was gone. "Harry Wood, eh? You're a pure-blood, I'm assuming?"

"Yes."

"Aleron will be delighted to know." Tom rolled his eyes, ascending the staircase.

"Aleron?"

"Aleron Malfoy. You'll meet him soon enough. He's quite vain and self-involved. Compliment him a few times and you're on his good side." Tom laughed, opening the door of his private chambers. "Insult him and you might as well sign your own death warrant. He's pompous but loyal enough. At least _his_ priorities are straight. Make yourself at home."

Harry's lips parted in a silent cry of shock. Hermione was Head Girl and her rooms were nowhere near as magnificent as these were. It was Riddle's own private flat. A gorgeously adorned living room leading into a small but efficient kitchen. Two doors branched on either side leading into what Harry figured to be the washroom and Riddle's bedroom. "This is...amazing. Being Head Boy has it perks."

"More than you know. You can transfigure yourself a bed if you like or you can sleep on the couch. Though, I recommend a bed, specifically elsewhere than the living room. Aleron and Corin are always coming here completely wasted. They think I have nothing better to do than pamper them."

"Corin?"

"Corin Lestrange." Tom smirked, opening the door to his boudoir. "I have plenty of space. You can transfigure a bed in here. I promise I don't have any strange night habits. At least this way, you'll have privacy."

"You honestly don't mind if I stay here with you?"

"As long as you're not a stalker or a pervert, be my guest." Suddenly, voices carried into the room. Tom patiently sighed. "You'll get to meet the infamous quartet of idiots that rampage through Hogwart's as if they own the place. Scared, Harry?"

"You wish."

Tom's laughter rang through the room. "You don't need to be scared of me. I'm harmless." The words, yeah right, flashed through Harry's mind. Harry knew how _harmless_ Tom Riddle was. Even this version of Voldemort wasn't altogether innocent. What it would have been like to go back into time when Tom Riddle was still naïve and still a child but from the stories Harry had heard, Tom was never innocent. From the second he was brought into the world, his innocence had faded and he'd begun to sin.

"Who the bloody hell are you talking to?" a rich drawl came from the living room. Harry was close behind Riddle as they went to join the four boys that had crashed Riddle's chambers. Liquid silver eyes over-looked Harry curiously. "Well, well, well. Did you find yourself a pet?"

"Watch your mouth, Aleron," Riddle's smile was like poison. "Harry Wood, meet Aleron Malfoy." Harry felt his heart leapt to his throat. This must have been Draco's grandfather. The same gray eyes, the same pale blond hair, the same white flesh. "Corin Lestrange." A wiry blond with deep blue eyes and a playful smile highlighting a handsome face. "Romulus Black." Harry's heart descended from his throat to the pit of his stomach. The face...so much like Sirius's. Midnight-colored hair with lapis highlights in the different lighting, pale blue eyes that startled Harry. A lean and limber body, bronzed to the point of perfection. "And of course, Septimus Snape." Mocha-colored hair clipped neatly at the boy's feminine jaw, brown eyes that were so light they were almost a deep golden hue. Tall and slender, he was the carven copy of Severus.

The boy's gave Harry a curt nod of approval, except Aleron. "You know, he resembles Potter." Aleron narrowed his eyes at Harry. "Are you related to Octavious Potter?"

"Who?" Harry's entrails knotted a couple hundred times.

"Your little interrogative finished, Aleron?" Once again, that sweet smile slid into place as Riddle glared at the blond. "He's from Beauxbatons-" Corin and Romulus snickered, earning a glower from Tom. "Do you wish to share?"

"I've heard that all the blokes at Beauxbatons are queer," Corin leered at Harry. "Is it true?"

"No. I've heard the same about Hogwarts's boys. Does the same imply?" Harry smiled innocently at Corin, earning a laugh from Riddle. It wasn't going to be so difficult to befriend Riddle after all. "You know, since you go by word of mouth and all."

"You know how to pick them," Romulus snorted, swinging his legs across Septimus's lap. "They all have to be like you. Doesn't that get old after awhile? Constantly having to battle someone that's an exact replica of yourself. Fuck, he even _looks_ like you. A bit narcissistic, aren't you?" Romulus ignored the death glare sent his way. "Sep, did you get the notes in Transfiguration?"

"I am _not_ your personal note-taker, Romulus." Septimus snarled, throwing Romulus's legs off of his lap. "You should learn to pay attention in classes, maybe you wouldn't be failing if you did! You're more concerned with Quidditch and getting laid."

"At least I'm getting some."

"They must shut your trap up first."

"You're just jealous because you're still a virgin," Romulus mocked, grinning cheshirely at Septimus. "So, Harry, tell us about yourself. Where you from, who're your parents, what's your blood type, what's your measurements, do you fancy girls or boys. You know, the simple stuff."

Harry cast a glance at Riddle, hoping the boy could get him out of the firing squad Romulus was putting him under. Riddle merely shrugged, apparently wanting to know the same. "I was born in Scotland. My parents are Lillian and James Wood. I'm a pure-blood. My measurements aren't your business and I fancy girls. Does that answer your questions?"

"Oh, I'm wounded!" Romulus clutched his chest melodramatically, falling into a heap on Septimus. "You wouldn't even consider doing a bloke, would you?"

"I...I've never thought about it." Harry frowned. "Why, have you?"

Aleron laughed. "Romulus does anything that can walk. If you have an entrance, he'll do you." A pillow was thrown at Aleron. "We have to go to Quidditch practice." Aleron chuckled. "Are you any good at Quidditch, Wood?"

"I'm fairly decent. I used to play Seeker."

"Well, isn't that a coincidence? Just so happens our Seeker position is open. I'm a beater. Corin and Romulus are chaser's and Tom's our keeper. Sep prefers his academics to Quidditch." Aleron rolled his eyes. "What do you say? Want to try out?"

"Alright." Harry began to follow the four boys when a hand on his arm made him pause. "Tom?"

"You should be meeting with Professor Dumbledore."

He had nearly forgotten. "He'll be there when practice is over."

"Suit yourself." Tom removed the hold on Harry's arm. "You do remind me of Potter. Strange, you remind me of myself as well. Should I be wary around you?"

"No, you have no reason to be wary."

"I suppose." Harry stifled his gasp as Tom tilted his chin, their eyes meeting. "You're right. There's no reason to be cautious around _you_." Smirking, Tom went to the door. "Oh, you might want to remember what Aleron said about Romulus." Chuckling, Tom's laughter echoed through the staircase.

Harry frowned. This wasn't going to be as easy as he thought. There were two personalities that Riddle had; Tom Riddle and Lord Voldemort and the latter, Harry was nervous about meeting but he knew before long that personality would become the dominant. Harry had to admit, he kind of like Tom.

XX

Another one! Heaven forbid it! However, I feel like I'm doing good with updating and I'm on a Tom Riddle/Harry obsession right now.


	2. Chapter Two

Title: On this Cross

Warnings: Male x Male

Disclaimers: Not mine

_there's no savior hanging on this cross  
it isn't suffering we fear but loss  
this is closer than I ever came  
just a burning moth without a flame_

Chapter Two

"Since you are new, the others will be trying for Seeker first and should they fail to impress me, you'll be given a chance," Tom said, casually sitting on his broomstick. "The Slytherin Quidditch team hasn't lost in twenty years. If you ruin our streak, you _will_ be expelled from the team." Grinning, the young man winked at Harry. "However, you have the build of a Seeker. I think you'll do fine. Good luck." Tom shot through the wind currents, looking remarkably graceful on the broom yet retaining a commanding presence towards his team.

A snort stopped Harry from staring at Tom. Realizing that he'd been caught, he blushed. Septimus shook his head, joining Harry on the grass to watch the team practice. "Let me guess, you _do _fancy boys and ironically, you've chosen the coldest bastard at Hogwart's to indulge your fancy with? I'm warning you, Harry. Tom keeps a safe distance from anyone, especially those that have a romantic interest in him. Should he find out that you're entertaining those thoughts, you might as well hex yourself."

"I don't have a crush on Tom, I was-"

"I'm not blind." Septimus sneered. "I've seen that same adoration on a couple dozen misfortunate idiots. Tom's handsome. You'd have to be stupid not to see that, even if you are straight. However, I've known Tom since he came to Hogwart's and believe me, finding someone to share happily forever after with is the furthest notion on his mind. He has visions of grandeur and nothing will deter his path. You had best heed my warning, Harry. Don't let Tom know."

Harry kept his growl to himself. He did not want Tom Riddle, in fact, he _loathed_ him. His future self, at least. There was nothing wrong with admiring another boy's appearance, that didn't make him a homosexual. "You're wrong, Septimus." Still, curiosity was driving a stake into Harry's mind. "Why doesn't he accept anyone's interest?"

Septimus shrugged. "Tom's a mystery. He doesn't let anyone close to him, even in a friendly manner. The secrets that are hidden are going to remain that way. That's why it's peculiar that he allowed you to room with him. Tom loves nothing more than his privacy and suddenly, he's permitting a stranger to intrude on that privacy. Maybe he sees you as another version of himself. I wouldn't let Tom's acceptance of you go to your mind or better yet, don't let it go to your heart."

"It won't. I don't have any interest in Tom Riddle like that." Harry resisted the urge to slam his fist into Septimus's jaw just to knock some sense into him. "I just find it intriguing that Tom doesn't accept love. To never experience love, it's sad."

"Love? No one ever loves Tom Riddle. They lust after him." Septimus smirked, looking like a more beautiful version of Severus Snape yet retaining the unmistakable qualities that were associated with Severus. Harry sighed. Did anyone even miss him? "Do you want him, Harry?"

"I _never_ have a relationship based on sex. It's wrong and unfair." Honesty was the best policy. "I don't believe in one-night stands. I believe that relationships could only be based on love, not some perverted view of lust." Septimus regarded him thoughtfully, gaze never leaving him. Harry flushed, unnerved by the inquisition. "Love comes from a need, lust from a want."

"You intrigue me. Maybe that's why Tom's taken up with you." Septimus wanly smiled, opening a notebook and his Transfiguration text, clearly signaling that the conversation was finished.

Harry wasn't bothered by the curt dismissal. He shielded his eyes against the sun, watching the team practice. Aleron was definitely good; fast and with enough maneuvering capabilities to put him to shame. Romulus and Corin seemed to be different people, their visages were set in determination, the sham of gaiety vanished. Harry's eyes drifted over the other players to land on Tom. Calmly and resolutely, Tom issued orders to his team. They were followed without question. It was like Harry was seeing a Death Eater meeting only with Quidditch. Was this how Voldemort's pawns reacted to an instruction from him? Wordlessly? Not for the last time, Harry wondered how Tom Riddle became Voldemort. How did that lovely young man transform into a hideous monster?

"Harry! It's your turn," Tom called from his position.

Accepting the broom that one of the boy's gave him, Harry mounted. He was in his element now. All traces of doubt and worry fled from his mind to be replaced with a serenity that most people would have been envious of. Only a gentle hand on his arm reminded him he wasn't alone in his own fantasy world. He quizzically arched a brow at Tom. "Yes?"

"Do your best," Tom smiled crookedly.

"My best might make someone look bad."

Laughing, Tom patted Harry's arm. "As long as you don't show me up, do what you feel is necessary."

Harry flew towards the center as the practice snitch was released. Hadrian Brody, one of the Slytherin hopefuls for Seeker, was beside him. Harry blocked all distractions from his mind, focusing intently on the faint flutter of the Snitch's wings, the rhythmical breeze the Snitch emitted as it floated through the air. He wasn't the youngest Seeker in history for nothing. The noises around him disappeared as he shot through the air towards the Snitch. Five seconds and the Snitch was in Harry's hand.

Complete silence met Harry's hasty capture. Embarrassed, he swooped to the ground. Tom was waiting for him, an inscrutable gleam in his eyes. "When you said that your best might make someone look bad, I wasn't expecting this." An odd little smile curled Tom's lips as he brought his hands together. The clapping clamored steadily from the other players.

Suddenly, arms were locked around his neck and hands were patting his back and shoulders. Romulus beamed up at him, ending his embrace with Harry quite reluctantly. "That was amazing! I've _never_ seen someone catch a Snitch that fast. Are you positive you haven't played professionally?" The butterflies escaped their prison from the pits of Harry's entrails. This pseudo-Sirius even spoke like him! "You alright, mate? You look a bit woozy."

"I'm fine. Honest." Before Harry could linger on the startling resemblance between Sirius and Romulus, voices interrupted. The Slytherin team was becoming agitated; that was apparent from the scowls and glares. "What's going on?"

"Gryffindor," Corin snarled menacingly. "The bastards think they own Hogwart's. All stuck-up prats with two heads; one lodged permanently up the teachers' arses and one up their own." Harry's grip on his tongue tightened. That was _not_ true. "And there's the ringleader. Octavious Potter."

Erasing all emotions from his face, Harry planted his feet firmly on the ground. It only took a second to find his grandfather. There was no mistaking that face. The swagger that Octavious had and the imperious smirk were the only unfamiliar aspects about Octavious. A full head over Harry and with a body finely tuned for Quidditch, his cocky demeanor suited his appearance. Wayward sable locks haphazardly stood on end, a few strands skimming his cheekbones and partially obscuring the twinkling hazel eyes. The swirling mists of clashing colors landed on him. "What do we have here? Another freak to join the circus. Where'd you find him, _Riddle_?" Octavious growled, eyes never straying from Harry.

Riddle crossed his arms in front of chest, one brow cocking lazily. "I'm not wasting my time on you or your posse of idiots." The darkness flashing in the emerald depths was enough to cause a shiver to wind around Harry's spine. "Practice is dismissed. Our first game is against Ravenclaw on Saturday. I expect you all to be in your top performance."

The Slytherin's departed, following the lead of their captain. Harry kept his gaze from going to Octavious, alarmed by the amount of ferocity and anger Octavious was emitting towards Tom. Had this rivalry sparked Voldemort's hatred for him and his family in the future? Had Tom Riddle carried it with him for all of those years? Harry looked towards Tom, the other youth waiting for his team to clear the field before going himself. How many quarrel's had happened between them since they first met? What had caused the deep enmity betwixt them?

"You look reasonable enough." Harry turned to look at Octavious. "Why are _you_ with Tom Riddle? He's not to be trusted."

"Why?"

Octavious, all traces of humor gone, said, "Because, he's evil. He'll use you and then when he's finished with you, he'll kill you. Why do you think he's the heir of Salazzar Slytherin? You should be careful around him."

Harry shook his head. "You're wrong." Ignoring the fact that Octavious was his grandfather, Harry spun on his heel and stalked towards the entrance. It didn't matter if Octavious was right. This Tom Riddle wasn't like Lord Voldemort, was he? Faint breathing alerted Harry that he wasn't alone in the tunnel leading towards the pitch. Adjusting to the dim lighting, Harry was surprised to see Riddle. "Tom? What are you doing here?"

The feral eyes were narrowed. "What did he say to you? Warn you about me?" Riddle chuckled, the laugh hollow.

"As a matter of fact, he did." Harry grinned, resting against the wall, tucking his arms behind his head. He looked at Tom; the other boy was coldly unresponsive. The only evidence he was furious was the miniscule twitch of his jaw that anyone not perceptive might have missed. "I don't know what rift you two have and frankly, I really don't care. He might want me on his side but I'm on my own side. No one else's."

Tom rolled his eyes, kicking himself off of the wall. "You might change that one day. If you had to choose between life or death, your mind would be made up. You'd choose life, even if that meant serving a lord beyond your wildest nightmares or fighting a losing battle every day of your life. No one is on their own side. Only either the extremely foolish or the extremely brave are. I'm still deciding which one of those you are."

"Me? I can be both," Harry teased. Cringing, Harry mentally cursed himself. _Teasing_ Tom Riddle, also known as Lord Voldemort; that was unacceptable. It came naturally, almost as much as breathing or Quidditch. "Despite your personality, you probably can be as much of a fool as the next person. You just have to be candid enough to not care what anyone thinks about you."

"I'm no fool, Harry. I never was a fool, not even as a child," the anger in Tom's voice was well-hidden. Tom headed towards the locker room, not in the least bit bothered by Harry's increasing tension. "You could have agreed with Potter. You don't know me. What's to prove his accusation false? Why didn't you turn on me, Harry?"

Harry was completely taken aback by the sheer and utter confusion in Tom's voice, the almost yearning look in those clear green eyes. "Do I have a reason to turn my back on you? Can _you_ prove what he's said is the truth?" Harry could prove that Lord Voldemort was evil but he couldn't prove that Tom Riddle was. Tom Riddle had emotions, Voldemort did not. That alone was enough to prove that Tom wasn't completely committed to the dark side.

Riddle shrugged, the discussion finished. Harry stood, awkwardly, to the side as Riddle disappeared into one of the showers. "Let me guess, shy?" Romulus winked, throwing his sopping hair over his shoulders, lips devilishly curled into a seductive grin. "Never been naked in front of other blokes before?"

"No, it's not that. I just don't feel like taking a shower now, that's all."

"Can't you and your libido lay off for a few minutes every now and then?" Septimus cast a glower at Romulus, buffeting the other boy over the head with his fist. "I swear, if you paid as much attention to your studies as you did your prey, you'd be the best student in the school. Probably even more intelligent then Tom."

"You hurt me!" Romulus feigned pain, swooning dramatically to the floor.

Aleron passed, aiming a kick at Romulus. "You should listen to Sep. Unless you intend to make sex your life's vocation then I have no problem with your extracurricular activities but once you interfere with the comfort of another student; it's called rape or does that word not exist in your vocabulary?"

Romulus snorted, sitting on his haunches. "Always going to be a prick, aren't you? Just because Harry's damn good at Quidditch doesn't make you his personal bodyguard. He's a big boy, let him take care of himself. What? Want to change his diapers too?"

"Piss of, Romulus," Aleron snarled.

The air suddenly became twenty degrees cooler as the animosity between the two escalated. "Senseless fighting between housemates is discouraged." Harry knew he was gaping openly at Riddle. In fact, the remainder of the team in the locker room were. "I do find it quite entertaining that you two have a competition that's steadily increased over the years." Harry wasn't paying any thought to the words flowing from Riddle's mouth. It was apparent that Harry's sentiments were met by several of the Slytherin's; Aleron, Corin, Septimus, and Romulus included.

The towel was slung provocatively low on Riddle's slender hips. An artist had to have slaved decades in order to create a being so perfectly formed. A slab of marble sculpted into a human so perfect, the angels had to have envied their master's creation. A sophisticated throat led into elegant shoulders turning into lissome arms, the muscles flexing as Tom gesticulated with a hand. Harry's eyes trailed towards Riddle's chest. Supple and lean yet undeniably sculpted without a hint of blemish. Pectorals that put most of the celebrities from Harry's world to shame. An abdominal plane that held flawless, compact muscles. The curves and symmetrical lines of muscle gave an appealing secret to what lay beneath the towel.

Harry jerked himself into reality, feeling stares upon him. Tom's steady gaze made him flustered. He _knew _he had been caught. Tom merely finished his monologue with a smirk and vanished to storage. Harry glared at Corin's amused chuckles. Much to his bewilderment, Corin wasn't laughing at him. Corin was in an absolute riot regarding the whipped appearances of Aleron and Romulus.

Septimus, however, was not going to let it alone. "He's never done that before." Harry frowned, not liking that Septimus knew what was on his mind; exactly like his annoying grandson. "I told you he was beautiful and that nearly every student at Hogwart's is dieing for a chance to bed him. You're not an exception, are you?" Septimus clucked his tongue. "It is odd that Tom decided that today would the day that he'd intervene on one of Aleron and Romulus's arguments, especially nearly nude. Would you hurt him, Harry?"

"What the hell kind of question is that?!"

"Just answer it."

Aleron, Corin, and Romulus ceased talking. Harry felt the blood pound in his ears, his heart yammering in his chest. Would _he_ hurt Tom? It would more than likely be the vice versa. Why _would_ he want to hurt Tom? Unless they were fighting on the battlefield, Harry didn't particularly see another moment when they would be dueling. Unless....unless...Septimus meant... "No! There's not a chance in _hell_ that I would see Riddle as what you're implying! Are you a deranged psycho?"

Septimus's lips parted to speak but, his eyes slid to look behind Harry. Bristling with rage, anxiety and terror, Harry met the no longer playful green eyes but the garnet flecked jade that he associated with Voldemort. Immediately, Harry's emotions abandoned him, leaving him standing on a plank between one and perdition. There wasn't anger. Just a deep-rooted pain blended with betrayal. "Tom?" Septimus whispered.

"Tom! Wait!" Harry called, running after Tom. Never in his life did he _think_ he'd feel terrible about hurting Tom Riddle's feelings but he did. This wasn't like in his dreams, when he wanted to make Voldemort hurt for all the wrongs he'd done but this wasn't Lord Voldemort. This was Tom Riddle, a boy with emotions, a boy that was already mentally fragile and who with one wrong move could snap into a horrible monster.

XXX

blinks several times That many reviews for this crappy story? falls over dead I'm amazed at the response this story has generated and I only hope that I can keep with it.

Thank you to: **aikidobrat**, **flyingshadow370 **_I have my own little twist ;)_, **goody2sho, hecatedemort, schneeleopard, sharade, Skittles the Sugar Fairy, riantlykalopsic **_Thank you! I was wary about putting the original characters in this story. Your vote of confidence helps_, **Raven's Light, Lady Phoenix Slytherin, sexy pancake, Miss V **_getting reviews like yours makes authors want to continue. Thank you so much! _**Caecuslupa, Kiharu-sama **_I was thinking about how in the second movie there was some...sexual tension. This came to my head and voila! _**chekiita, HellPhoenixSirius, Akkiko, SlytherinHeadGirl, Tigris T Draconis, Angelic Candy **_Harry doesn't KNOW he's gay, yet. There is definite romance involved already but for Harry, he cares because he thinks it's friendly feelings and as for Tom, well, that's a secret. Actually, I hadn't even THOUGHT about adding parsletongue in here! Thanks for the great idea!_, **Gia, ddz008 **_Aww, many thanks, _**Dassani **_I'm not too sure I liked the whole Harry and Octavious meeting. As for the Nc-17 bits.....OF COURSE! I wouldn't be a slash writer if I didn' t include those. The full hard core sex won't be until near the very end but there will be limey bits every now and then. I'll archive those chapters on _

**Once again, I really appreciate the reviews. The more I have, the more prompted I'll be to write. _Hint Hint._**


	3. Chapter Three

Title: On this Cross

Warnings: Male x Male

Disclaimers: Not mine

_isaac's knife can  
cut away  
all the poisoned  
yesterdays  
and the anger  
ease it down  
into the ocean  
let it drown  
as far as east is  
from the west  
I let you go  
I know it's best  
and my answer to the years of strife  
is the way I choose to live my life_

_Chapter Three_

Harry had not realized that the sun had already sank below the mountains. The stars shimmered in the heavens and the moon shone with such radiance that tranquility eased through Harry. That was until his gaze fell upon a figure resting on one of the demolished ramparts. Harry felt for the first time in his entire life the intoxicating and sweetly seductive embrace of pure and utter attraction. The experience was new to Harry and he did not understand the awakening emotions rising inside of him, deluging his entire body with an unknown sensation. He crept silently towards Tom, not exactly positive on what needed to be spoken between them to fix the rift.

A sigh escaped Tom's lips. "I know you're there, Harry. You don't have to hide from me."

Harry shoved his hands in his pockets, standing next to Tom. They were silent, the only noise was the distant hubbub of conversation from Hogwart's and the chirping of insects hidden in the bushes that surrounded them. Harry glanced at Tom, confused. Why did he feel the need to apologize for what he'd said? It was the truth. It was going to be nearly impossible to be friends with Tom since he knew what he became when he was older but to pursue a more intimate relationship? It was too preposterous to consider. Ridiculous even. "Tom?"

Riddle raised himself to his elbows, turning towards Harry. The luminosity of the moon highlighted Tom's eyes, adding an ethereal luster to the deep, almost obsidian-green depths. A faint breeze swept through the trees behind them. The wind ruffled Tom's hair, blowing the tresses aside to reveal the young man's alluring face. The shadows danced mischievously across the visage, the chiseled cheekbones and jaw giving Tom an enticing aura. "Why does it feel like I know you?" the words were whispered, drifting on the air currents. "No, not that I _know_ you but that I _knew_ you or that I should have known you in a past life. One minute I feel like I should be hexing you with the strongest curses imaginable but then the next second, I want nothing more than to be friends with you."

Soothing his nerves, Harry took a seat beside of Tom. He fiddled with the edge of his sweater, unable to look at Tom. "If you can't explain it then why bother to dwell on it? If we were supposed to meet than it's beyond our capabilities to change it. Our meeting might have been written in the stars long before we were born."

"I don't leave my life to Fate. I am in control of my own destiny. No one's going to choose the paths I walk but myself. It might seem callous but to believe in the divine is to believe that we do not have freewill. I do. I'm going to _make_ everyone see that one day." The determiniation in Riddle's voice was resolute and forceful.

"And you will," Harry murmured. "Tom, I don't know what happened earlier. I don't know if you mistook what I said for something else or not." He adjusted his glasses, meeting Tom's gaze. "What I don't know is _what_ you mistook it for. Septimus told me that you don't let anyone past your defenses you've built. I can hardly blame you. It's hard to trust anyone. When I was little, my parents were murdered and I was sent to live with my relatives. They never cared about me. I was beaten, starved, and locked away in a cupboard under the stairs until I was twelve. I never had a childhood, I barely remember my parents."

"You told me your parents sent you here-"

"I lied. I came here because I ran away from home. I'm seventeen, old enough to live on my own and make my own decisions. What I'm trying to tell you is that just because all of those things happened to me hasn't made me completely shut everyone off to getting to know the real me. One day, I hope to let someone in that will love me and take care of me but if you keep barricades around your heart then you'll live a bitter life. Love is the most wondrous gift we have in this life. It's what most people live for. I'm included. I've been waiting seventeen years, I figure another seventeen won't matter too much."

"You're definitely an enigma, Harry." Tom wanly smiled, raising himself fully from the stone. "I hadn't realized that you'd had such a difficult life. I had one too. I'm not going to tell you. Every time I think of what was done I become difficult to manage. Perhaps you can be a welcome distraction from my nightmares." Harry's eyes widened. Tom either didn't notice Harry's discomfort or didn't care. "Septimus is right. I don't let anyone near me. Once those interested discover my true natureâ€they tend to abandon me rather quickly. I can't blame them. I'd desert me as well."

Harry shook his head. "No one deserves to be forsaken. My past has made me the person I am today. I'm stronger than I probably would be if it hadn't occurred. Because of it, I know how to appreciate love when I'm given it. Whether it's friends, family, or lovers. My relatives shattered me repeatedly but I forgave them every time and yes, I even love them. Tom, if you'd just experience it once with the right person, you'd never go back."

"Maybe." Tom stood, crossing his arms in front of his chest, eyes fixated on the distant mountains. "Why do you care, Harry?"

Harry remained seated, contently sighing. "I don't want to see you become a monster hell bent on destroying all the good in the world because you didn't receive enough love as a child. Face it, you're still a kid. You have enough time to find that one person that makes you all tingly and gooey inside." Flippantly smirking, Harry jumped to his feet, landing neatly beside of Tom. "You can be an idiot all you want Tom but understand that someone _will _chase after you and you'll have to decide if you want to remain lonely or not. Your choice. You have free will, after all."

"Right." Tom chuckled. As they began to exist their sanctuary, Tom hesitantly rested his hand on Harry's arm, startling him. "Iâ€I want to thank you. You're the first one who has ever tried to befriend me or to even show that you might be a little interested in me as a person." Tom shyly smiled.

"You're welcome. You know, when you smile and mean it, it makes your whole face light up. It'sâ€beautiful." Harry thought nothing of his observation as he continued towards the door. Tom steadily stared at Harry's retreating back. Shrugging, he followed the other boy into the castle.

X X

Harry was not astonished that the quartet were in Riddle's chambers. "Shouldn't you all be studying or something?"

Romulus's grin was huge. "Why, we are. Tom's the subject of our project. It's entitled, Ten Ways to Wank. Number One, find a drop-dead gorgeous boy. Number Two, find another equally sexy bloke. Number Three, picture the above mentioned boys shagging silly. Number Four, then, imagine yourself in a threesome with the lovely lads. Num-" A pillow was thrown at Romulus's face from a peeved Septimus. "Seppy, what's the matter with you? You were going to be number five."

"You incompetent idiot! If I wouldn't get expelled, I'd kill you!"

Romulus pouted, shuffling towards Septimus. "You'd kill me, Seppy?" Sniffling, he launched himself on Septimus. "Take it back before your venomous words hurt me!" Mock crying, Romulus winked cheerfully at Harry over Septimus's shoulder. "Woe is me to die by the hand of my secret fancy."

"Oh please, the only thing that could kill you would be to have sex withheld from you." Septimus patiently sighed, unwinding Romulus's death grip on his waist.

Tom sat next to the fireplace a couple of meters from the excitement, a steaming mug in his hands. Harry ventured towards him, wondering if he was even welcome. "I should have asked if you wanted some tea. Would you like me to make you some?"

"No, thank you." Harry watched Romulus's antics, finding it highly disturbing. Aleron and Corin weren't even phased as they lounged lethargically on the couch either bored or tired. Romulus was currently doing his best to grab Septimus's buttocks while Septimus swatted the offending appendage to the side only to have to grapple with Romulus's other hand. Then, a spark in Septimus's espresso hued eyes had Harry reeling. "He enjoys it."

"What?" Tom inquired.

"Septimus _likes_ Romulus's attentions. I mean, look. Septimus could easily stun Romulus but instead he lets Romulus do what he wants with him. Either I'm completely batty or my observational skills are extremely good but I think Septimus is fond of Romulus. He loves him, very much, apparently. Unrequited love is terrible but not loving at all is even worse."

"Oh, I wouldn't say that it's unrequited. Romulus is extremely taken with Septimus. He has been since I've known them. Quite a precocious first year if I recall correctly. Already planning to lose his virginity and telling everyone about it. I found him to be a rather disgusting pervert with a hormonal imbalance." Harry laughed. "I suppose he's my ally. He can be a bit annoying but his family are pure-bloods as are Septimus's, Corin's, and Aleron's. Nearly everyone that composes Slytherin are pure-blooded. As I was saying, Romulus adores Septimus to the point of infatuation."

"Then why aren't they together?"

Tom snorted. "Romulus hates monogamy. He has a different lover once an hour. I remember last year he had thirteen girlfriends and five boyfriends in the same week. Septimus on the other hand has always been rather secretive and prefers his own company. At least, he used to. I suppose eventually everyone falls in love. Even me according to you."

"Just be patient," Harry admonished. "You know, you don't have to wait for love to come to you. You can go searching for it just as easily."

"I'm not well versed in the art of romance. Why-"

"Oh boys! It's Friday night! Aren't we going to party?!" Harry glanced at Tom who merely shrugged. Corin was beaming as he opened the door, only to be knocked to the floor being suddenly engulphed in a clash of brown, black, and red. "Hi guys! You ready to paint the town red with us?" Three girls were eagerly watching the six young men anxiously. Harry pursed his lips, deciding where he'd seen them before. The one attached to Corin like a leech reminded Harry of, terrifyingly enough, Marcus Flint. She was modestly attractive with long, nut colored hair skimming her slightly robust waist. Slightly narrowed gray eyes landed on Harry before returning to Corin's ministrations. The petite one was rolling her brown eyes at the couple's public display of affection. She barely came to Harry's chest and was her tiny disposition was shadowed by Harry's girth even though he was not a hefty man. The last one caught Harry's attention. Honey colored hair fell in sensual curls to the small of her back, clashing with her perfectly bronzed flesh and seductive violet eyes. Tall and thin, she was the model of perfection that most boys sought after in a girlfriend.

"My, my, who is this eye candy?" the blonde asked, looking near ready to eat Harry alive.

"Harry Wood, meet Ghislaine Montague, Kaie Flint and Lykaios Nott. In other words, meet the women that make our lives a living hell," Romulus introduced the trio. He grabbed his sweater that had miraculously came off during his and Septimus's altercation. "Harry, you coming with us?"

"I, um," he glanced at Tom. "I think I'll stay here."

"Suit yourself," Ghislaine sneered. "You're rather handsome, are you sure you don't want to come with us? I could show you a time that you wouldn't forget. Unless, you take it like dear Romulus does. Do you, Wood? Like it from the back? I bet you and Riddle keep this place steamy." Harry flushed, glimpsing Tom's pale face.

"Ghis" Romulus warned, normal voice a gruff bass. "If Harry wants to stay here, he can. Keep your mitts away from him."

"Why the protection?" Ghislaine shoved Romulus to the side. "He certainly looks strong enough to fend a little girl off. I wonder, does his wand skills match?" Ghislaine seductively licked the tip of her finger. "Come with us, please? I'll show you what a real woman can do. I can take care of you, more than that _half-breed _can," the venom in her words was enough to send Riddle into red-tinged world.

"_Leave_," Tom hissed, hand gripping the mug in his hand tightly.

"Fine. Mark my words, _Riddle_, someone is going to knock you off of your pedestal and I'm going to be there to gloat in your face. You faggot, ugh, you disgust me. I hope you're not one of those nasty bastards too, Wood." Snarling at Tom, Ghislaine made a rude gesture and left, a nonchalant Aleron following her.

"What is her problem?!" Romulus screeched, trembling with anger. "Harry, I'm real sorry you had to see that. Ever since Tom refused her advances, she's been out to get him ever since. Not that Tom can't take care of himself because he can. Harry, you should watch your-"

"It isn't necessary to warn him, Romulus." Tom, fury gone leaving nothing but cold ash behind. "Harry's protection is mine. You tell Montague that if she comes within a meter of Harry, I won't hesitate to kill her where she stands." No emotion registered from Tom. "Why you choose to make her your friend is beyond me. Why Aleron follows her with those sad eyes is phenomenal. Just go, alright? Have fun with each other and don't even bother coming here when you get back completely plastered."

The assembled winced as the bedroom door slammed. "You sure you want to stay behind?"

"I'm sure, Romulus. Thank you. It was nice meeting you, Kaie, Lykaios. Maybe next time we can drag Tom to come with us as long as your friend isn't invited. Septimus, keep an eye on Romulus, will you?" Winking, Harry knocked on the bedroom door. "Tom? Please, let me in. They're all gone." No answer from inside. "Oh Tom, I'm sorry. I know that saying it won't make it better. I know that it hurts, Tom. I really do. I-"

The door opened, revealing a ghostly white but composed Riddle. "You should have taken her offer. She's better company then I am, even when I'm in a normal mood. You can come inside. You're sharing the place with me, might as well make yourself comfortable."

Harry smiled at the second bed. "I thought I was supposed to do that?"

"Yes, well, I took the initiative," Tom grinned.

"Tom, I won't deny it. Ghislaine is incredibly attractive but, other than that, I wouldn't touch her. Besides, who wants someone you'd have to stupefy just to be around?" Harry laid on Tom's bed, gazing at him cheekily. "Your bed's softer. I think I'll stay right here."

"Harry, I'm not in the mood for this. It's too confusing as it is and you're only making it worse."

"Oh. Okay." Harry, puzzled did as he was told. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine. You don't need to worry about me. I'm going to sleep. You can leave the door open if you want to stay up." Ignoring the fact that Harry was looking at him, Tom divested himself of his robes. "You forgot to talk to Professor Dumbledore. You can borrow a pair of clothes to wear to bed if you'd like. We're roughly the same size though, you're a bit thinner than I am." Self-conscious of his body, Tom hastily dressed into his pajamas before slipping underneath the duvet.

Harry took silken pants from the wardrobe. "I wonder what Romulus and the others are doing? I'd like to see him with Septimus." Wistful tears came to his eyes. Seeing all of these people that reminded him of his family and friends made his soul ache terribly. Especially Romulus. That had to be the thorn in his side. They were alike in so many different ways that Harry had to keep watching which name he called Romulus. "Tom? Are you awake?"

"Yes."

Removing his glasses, Harry buried himself against the down feathered pillow. "Do you have nightmares?"

"Yes."

"Willâ€will you wake me up if I have one tonight? I should be fine butâ€I never know when I'll have an attack." Harry instinctively moved aside his hair to feel the scar beneath. Although Dumbledore had used a charming spell to hide the appearance, the actual scar remained buried. "If it's an inconvenience to you then you don't have to bother. It's justâ€it's nice to have someone hold you when your scared."

"I wouldn't know," Tom's voice whispered.

"It doesn't have to be like that. If you have a nightmare, I'll comfort you. Do we have a deal?"

"Harry, I don't think that'd be such a good idea."

"Why not?"

"I don't feel like discussing this. Not yet. Goodnight, Harry."

"Tom, thank you for what you said earlier about you know, protecting me. It means a lot to me." A noncommittal grunt was all he received for answer. "Good night Tom." It felt strange not being his room with the other boys. He strangely missed Ron's snoring, Seamus's sleep walking, Neville's groaning and Dean's sleep-talking. However, he liked this. Harry glanced at Tom's blurry form. What was Tom talking about earlier? What _didn't_ he feel like discussing? The cogs in Harry's mind eventually slowed and Harry fell into a deep slumber.

XXX

Once again, I'm in complete and utter shock that this story is liked. I think I'm doing terribly but if I don't stop blushing with the praise I'm going to turn into a tomatoe.

I was wary about adding the three female characters but I love angst and Ghislaine is adding the perfect angst.

I hope I'm not rushing anything and if I am, kindly tell me so I can slow it down a bit.

Thank you to my readers: **Skittles the Sugar Fairy **_thank you! I'm glad you don't think it's crap because I do. _**ddz008 **_There is another Tom/Harry called Bonds, I think. It's very good. It's what started the whole Tom/Harry obsession for me. _**Hoshi Hikari4ever, Evil Enchantress, Sweet-Pea Fairy, Schneeleopard, hecate de mort, Foxy Kitt Kat 2000, Angelic Candy **_Thank all the reviewers. I was waiting to see if I could get 25 for chapter two and I did! Shocked the hell out of me. You're hinting at a lot of things, Candy.. You might figure out the story before I do. Lol. Longer chapters?! This one's five. That's saying a lot for a three page chapter person. _**Whyshoulditellyou, Raven's Light, Kiharu-sama **_Nothing that happens in this story will be reflected on the Harry's time. In fact, another world is being created from this time line. It's odd. _**Caecuslupa, jessie, Midnight Silver Shadow, goody2sho, SlashableAmaryllis, Virginia-RiddleMalfoy, Akkiko **_Kawaii! XD_**, Mandala, kizna2, lil-black fox, nicolettenick, Delinka, Lisa **_the 50th reviewer. yay.I'm trying to make it as realistic as possible but if I fail, be sure to tell me._


	4. Chapter Four

Title: On this Cross

Warnings: Male x Male, reference to rape

Disclaimers: Not mine

_there's no savior hanging on this cross  
it isn't suffering you fear but loss  
when there's no one else around to blame  
you're a burning moth without a flame_

Chapter Four

Blatant sobbing permeated the depths of Harry's dreams. Was he asleep? Were these sounds, so terribly painful, his own? A sharp cry of intense suffering shattered Harry's confusion. "Tom," Harry breathed, forgetting the boundaries between his limitations, the boundaries that had been erected since he was an infant when Lord Voldemort murdered his parents. All he knew was that Tom Riddle was in emotional turmoil. Tom Riddle, the young man that would become Lord Voldemort at any given moment never to revert to his old self again. Against the protests of rationality, Harry crossed the gap between his and Tom's bed.

Nightmares, the kind that most humans never had to experience were plaguing Tom. The ones that terrorized one's waking and sleeping psyche, emitting such trepidation that it was nearly impossible to carry on life with even a hint of normalcy. Ignoring the fact that Tom had bade him steer clear of offering any comfort, Harry crawled into bed beside the whimpering boy for Tom was a boy despite his maturity. This night, Tom would receive the care he so desperately sought for but did not have. This night, the blockades around their unique situation would be annihilated.

Harry gazed at Tom's face, heart wrenching at the site of tears staining the fair cheeks. Gently, he reached forward, fingers wiping the saline rivulets aside, gasping as Tom unconsciously leaned into the touch. He caressed the sable locks from Tom's sweat-ridden face, lingering for a few seconds on the beautiful visage before him. Not heeding the warnings issuing the consequences of his actions, Harry wrapped an arm around Tom's waist, urging him to rest against his chest. Tom nestled against his pectorals, warm breath dancing across Harry's skin. "Tom, you don't have to be afraid. I don't know what made you become the demon that I know but I will try to prevent that from happening. I promise that none of the nightmare's you have will ever become a reality again. I'm your friend as remarkable as that is. I want to know you. The real you, if only you'll let me. Let me inside of your walls, Tom. We can save each other." Harry sighed, tucking Tom's head underneath his chin. "If only my friends could see me now." He laughed quietly, tangling his free hand through Tom's hair.

In a matter of minutes, Tom's sobs were completely silent and Harry was once again asleep.

X X X

Warmth. Security. Love. Hope. Tom felt foreign emotions course through his veins as consuming as wildfire, plunging through the catacombs of his heart. What was this safety he felt? Why did he feel so content? Radiant jade eyes shuddered open slowly, only to widen in alarm. "No," Tom whispered, seeing that the protection he'd felt was not his imagination and the cause was Harry. "No," Tom repeated, this time louder. He scrambled from the embrace as if the two arms holding him were the plague. "I'm not weak enough to have to have someone take care of me. I can take care of myself. I don't-"

"Tom?" Harry inquired, blearily reaching for his glasses. "What's the matter?" Panic unleashed itself. Immediately, Harry was awake and gazing at Tom.

"Why did you do that?" Tom's voice was eerily placid, reminding Harry of the calm before the storm. "Why did you feel the need to make of fool of me. I told you not to touch me and disregarded what I had said. I have no need to be consoled. I've been providing my own solace for seventeen years. Do you think I need to be pacified? Do you see me _that_ fragile?"

Harry's anger domineered his mind. "To seek comfort from another source other than yourself is not a weakness, it's a strength! You were having a nightmare and I couldn't see you suffer like that!" He growled, removing himself from Tom's bed. "You're like a fallen angel, Tom. Something caused you to become what you are today. If you opened up a little, it might help. I'm willing to listen and be your friend. You just have to allow yourself to trust in me."

"I trust no one, not even myself. Should I ever become stronger, I'll forget who I am. I'll change my name and my identity to where I won't able to recognize myself. I will make those who hurt me pay with their miserable lives." Tom's fist clenched. "When I'm finished, the reason for who I am will be purged from this planet and those worthy enough will revel in my gift." Dangerous eyes flickered towards Harry, the emerald losing itself in the crimson. "One day, I _will_ deny my heritage and become the most powerful wizard that ever lived and my enemies will be slaughtered by the thousands." The shudders consumed Harry's shivering body. "Now, do you think I _deserve_ to be soothed when I have my hellish dreams? Am I worthy of any sort of affection when I've already turned my back on this entire _fucking_ world?"

"Tom, this isn't you."

"How do you know?" Tom approached Harry, lips curled into a maniacal sneer. "I could strike you dead at this very moment. I could torture you for hours and not feel a single emotion." Tom called his wand to him silently. "Are you scared, Harry? Is your soul prepared should you die?"

Chest heaving with anxiety, Harry motioned for his own wand. "My soul is always ready. I have no sins to account for. Would you honestly kill me, Tom? I won't go without a fight." Wand poised to defend himself, Harry braced for Tom's offensive but it never came. Slowly, Harry peered at Tom. The boy was regarding his wand thoughtfully, glancing at his own before returning to staring at Harry's.

"How can this be?" Tom's voice was barely audible. "Your wand is the same as mine. I don't understand. How did you come across your wand?"

"I was given it. What's so special about it, anyway?"

"The phoenix pinion used in my wand is the brother of the one used in your own. I can sense it, as strange as that sounds. It's perplexing. In short, it means that should we duel and duel in earnest, most of our spells would be rendered useless save for the strongest ones. Should I cast _Avada Kedavra_ on you, the spell wouldn't be deflected but if I were to cast _Petrificus Totalus,_ that spell would return to me and I would be under the affects of my own spell." Tom shook his head, placing his wand on his bed. "And I wouldn't cast a death spell on you no matter what you did to irk me. I might cast a silencing charm but other than that, I doubt I could seriously injure you."

"Are you bipolar?" Harry asked, blinking dazedly. "You just _asked _me if my soul was prepared to die! Generally when someone speaks like that, it usually means there's going to be a fight! Now, you're saying that you don't want to hurt me. What kind of psycho are you?"

Tom laughed, going into the living room with a bundle of clothes tucked underneath an arm. "I was testing you. I wanted to see how serious you were. Harry, in all truth, do you think that I could become the next Dark Lord? Is my soul as evil as I think it is?"

"No, it isn't." Harry smiled. "The fact that you cried last night in your sleep is more than enough reason for me to believe that it's not too late for you to change paths and start towards a different future. You're hatred towards those that hurt you is deep but then again, there are people that care about you. If you had honestly turned your back on the world, you wouldn't associate with Aleron, Corin, Romulus, or Septimus and you sure as hell wouldn't let me live with you. You wouldn't show that your human or open up to me if you hated me. The question is, do you _want_ to become the next Dark Lord? Is your past reason enough to murder innocent people?"

"I don't know. I don't know much of anything anymore. Had this been a week ago or even a couple nights ago, I would have told you that yes, I am the next Dark Lord but now, I'm too confused to even think straight. What are you doing to me, Harry?"

"Huh?" Harry cocked his head to the side. "What do you mean, what am I doing to you?"

"That's a secret. Here, you can wear these until you get this whole situation sorted with Professor Dumbledore." Harry caught the jeans and shirt thrown at him. Tom sent him an undecipherable look, that quiet smile curling his lips. "I'm going to take a bath. You can freshen yourself if you need to. I won't mind if you come in."

Harry was rooted to his spot, gawking at Tom as he vanished into the bathroom, door open in invitation. Water being disturbed snapped Harry from his reverie. He needed to wash his hair, the permanently disheveled tresses were mussed beyond. "Are you sure you're fine with me coming in there?" A grunt was all the answer he was given. Taking that as an affirmation, Harry carefully walked inside of the bathroom, surprised by how expansive it was. The tub had to have been large enough to accommodate four people and appeared to have quite a large amount of depth considering Tom wasn't visible. "Tom?"

A head emerged from the water. "Why don't you get in with me? There's plenty of room and I promise that I won't hex you if you see me naked." The voice was light, teasing, and mildly flirtatious. Harry was oblivious to the latter, being the naïve young man that he was. "Our Quidditch game is at one o'clock. Unfortunately, it's only eight. Septimus will be arriving any second now and you know that Romulus will be tagging along at his heels." Tom rested against the side of the tub, arms folded on the edge. "Will you be going with them to get breakfast at Hogsmeade?"

"Probably, I'm starving. I didn't eat at all yesterday. You don't go out with them, do you?"

"Not once. Social situations don't appeal to me. I prefer my privacy and if I do want to socialize I only like to do it with one person at one time. I might be cruel but I've been known to give advice when it's desperately needed. I listen unprejudiced and give my honest opinion and thoughts. You should feel lucky, you're the first person I've ever allowed to see sides of me that no one has seen before. Sides that I want to forget, sides that I loathe. I will rid myself of them eventually. Then, I won't have any need to have feelings. I won't have to be confused or scared or lonely." The last word was a whisper.

"Why are you so damn eager to lose your humanity?" Harry sat on the edge of the tub. "It's not like having emotions makes you pathetic. It's the opposite. Everyone feels what you feel. I do. I feel scared and lonely all the time. I've never had a serious relationship in my life, just a mistake when I was fifteen. I'd like the girl for a while and I never thought she'd see me as anything but after her boyfriend was killed she began to see me in a different light. We kissed but it felt so wrong to be with her. I knew she didn't care about me, just that I reminded her of her dead boyfriend. She was using me, I think. See? You think you're the only who knows about loneliness, you're wrong."

"I've had no one, Harry. Not even a first kiss, as embarrassing as that is. I've never held hands or embraced another person. I just don't care about that. At least, I never thought about it. I've had more offers than I can remember but they were after my looks or my influence or my power or my titles. I guess, someone like me is only good for sex. No one in their sane mind would be insane enough to fall in love with me. I learned that a long time ago. Montague is one of many, all with the same attitude that a half-breed like me isn't worth their time. I refuse to be common whore."

"And what about loving another half-breed or is that against your laws?"

"I hate Mud-bloods and muggles," Tom spat.

"Then you should know that I'm a half-breed as well. I told you all that I was pure because I didn't want to be hated by the rest of the Slytherin's. To be hated by _you_. I understand if you can't stand to be near me anymore. I don't mind. I can-"

A long finger pressed against Harry's lips, shadowed green eyes met Harry's own. "We have very much in common, Harold Wood. Do you want to know _wh_y I hate Muggles? They spoil all innocence. My mother died not long after giving birth to me and that bastard of a father left her before I was but a tiny cell growing inside of my mother's womb. I was sent to an orphanage where I continued to live until I left of my own accord when I turned sixteen." The finger softly traced the ridges of Harry's lips. "Do you know what happens to you in orphanages, Harry?" Tom's voice became deeper, more smooth. "I was five when I was raped, Harry. Five. You might have been beaten and starved but I doubt you were forced to have sex. From that day on, I kept all from seeing the true me. Love became distorted. I'm still not clear on what love truly is. The only love that I have ever known was through pain. Do you see why I am the way I am, Harry? _Muggles_ turned me into what you see before you. _Muggles_ raped me. They all deserve to die. Purity is nothing more than another object they can acquire. I'm a used, disturbed young man with a dark past. Do _you_ hate me?"

Never in Harry's wildest dreams did he think that Tom Riddle had been raped, driving his hatred for Muggles. It was disturbing, disgusting, and depressing, adding to intangible pity that was slowly building within Harry's emotions. "Tom. I don't hate you. I don't think I could ever hate _you_." Heart beckoning him to take the initiative, Harry covered the finger currently on his cheek with his hand. "I don't really know you that well. There's only so much one can get to know about a person in sixteen hours. I don't know if things are moving to fast for us to truly trust one another to the fullest extent or not but I'm not going to stop trying, Tom. I really want to know _you _and I don't care that your past is dark. I honestly don't. I've seen dark and believe me, you have yet to become that evil."

"Harry," Tom murmured, mesmerized by the depth of emotions in the other boy's eyes, knowing that Harry had no earthly idea that he was broadcasting so much compassion. He ventured his other fingers to intertwine with Harry's, nearly trembling with the amount of raw _love_ reflecting in the vivacious emerald shards. _Never_ had Tom been this _close_ to another human being, especially outside of abuse. "Harry," Tom repeated, slowly inclining his head towards Harry's, close enough to feel Harry's breath. "This is too sudden. I'm not prepared for this and I know that you're not. You don't even know what you're asking for. _I_ don't even know what we're both yearning for. It's there. Can't you feel it?"

"Yes." Harry swallowed the lump in this throat, allowing Tom to come within mere centimeters of his personal space. _Oh God_, Harry whimpered to himself, mind drifting into reality. This was almost the exact scenario as when Cho has kissed him in fifth year except this was a Tom Riddle. Those long fingers trailed to Harry's chin, tilting the youth's head. "T...Tom?" Harry's breath hitched in his throat. Tom's eyes were closed, their noses a tiny fraction from touching. Harry felt the erotic tightening of his nether regions, the fires spreading rapidly from the places Tom had touched to delve greedily into a consuming pool of molten magma bursting forth in his loins. Just as those delicious lips came into contact with his own, Harry realized that what was about to happen was _not_ the same situation as Cho and him. This was far more deadly and far more intense. Swiftly, Harry jerked his head backwards.

Tom's glittering eyes snapped open, mystified. "What's wrong with you?"

"I don't want to kiss you. I don't like you like that, Tom!" Harry controlled his anxiety-ridden tremors. "I like girls."

"You don't sound very convincing." Tom laughed, splashing water on Harry. "I should be apologizing for my behavior. I told you, I'm often not myself when I talk about my past. It's good that you like girls or you might have made a mistake in letting me kiss you or forbid it, you might have kissed me in return and enjoyed it." Tom disappeared into the water again, leaving a distraught Harry.

His skin burned where he'd been touched and Harry knew that if Tom had kissed him, his lips would be burning as well. Harry sighed, submerging his head in the bath, satisfied enough that it was clean. Why on earth did Tom _want_ to kiss him? He hadn't gave any inclination that he longed for that, had he? He was friends with Tom. Nothing more _could_ happen, could it?

X X X

I reiterate, I am gobsmacked by the interest in this story. I'm a humble author who, hopefully, will be a _published_ author by early 2005. Random House has already agreed to publish my books. I'm very excited though, I doubt I will ever cease penning fanfiction. I want my own novels to have a legion of fanfiction writers. Especially slashers.

Thank you to: **HecateDeMort, lil-black fox, XHidden, foxy-kitty-kat2000, Akkiko, Skittles the Sugar Fairy, snuffles, bri, Raven's Light, sanzo, HoshiHiarki4Ever (**actually, I'm debating on how Harry should approach Dumbledore regarding Tom because Harry has no idea what the letter from the future Albus says**ddz008, Saavik13, Schneeleopard,LilBlackNiteCat, goody2sho, Angelic Candy (**Once again, your suggestions are wonderful, I'll probably use them. Hopefully this chapter brought Tom's hatred for Muggles into light as well as Tom's indecision regarding his feelings for Harry. Tom's not stupid, he knows something is going on inside of himself that is causing him to flirt with, touch, and in this chapter, nearly kiss Harry. Although the romance is prominent so early, there will be plenty of angst for the two to overcome in order to be together. Harry's naive and doesn't quite realize the truth. I desperately hope the "rape" wasn't too much for you but rest assured that there will be no other raping in this story. Thank you again!) **Delinka, Tigris T Draconis, Dassani, Kiharu-sama, Lisa, riantlykalospic (**the girls won't play a major role, they're there so the rest of the characters aren't purely gay. Lol) **chiemi, pixie, Sian, celestial light, ObsessedWithBlack**

**_Notes: This story will not effect the Harry's own time. Another, alternate, timeline is being developed. _**


	5. Chapter Five

Title: On this Cross

Warnings: Male x Male

Disclaimers: Not mine

_maybe I should take your face tonight  
let you see yourself in a different light  
if you were to take my place tonight  
wouldn't jesus be surprised_

Chapter Five

"But Seppy!" the whining voice of Romulus greeted Harry's ears as he ventured into the living room, drying his hair lethargically, mind elsewhere. In record time, Harry dressed into his borrowed clothes, frowning a little that the trousers were a bit loose and the sweater was a smidgen large. He felt self-conscious about his appearance; he knew he had lost a lot weight since Sirius died. For a couple of months all he ate was just enough to keep him alive.

_Sirius_, Harry conjured an image of his godfather. He missed him terribly; the feeling of protection, the fact that Harry _knew_ Sirius cared for him without the actual words being spoken, and interestingly enough, the embraces that Harry cherished above all else. Sirius was the first to hold him and mean it. Harry used to entertain thoughts of desire for Sirius, that the paternal loved he felt for Sirius was interwoven into the love of a partner. It was right after Sirius's death that Harry realized that his affections for Sirius were the exact opposite. Harry had seen Remus's strong fortitude collapse one night. The sobs that wreaked havoc on Remus bordered on the line of hysterical. Almost as if his soul had shattered. Harry frowned, easing the knot in his stomach. How was Remus coping without him? Harry was Remus's confident and the two often sought comfort together.

"Aren't you going to let them in?" a drawl interrupted Harry's thoughts. Harry shyly blushed, avoiding meeting Tom's vivid gaze. How on earth was he going to be able to be in Tom's presence after what had occurred? "Harry. I don't want anything to be different between us. I made a mistake and I apologized. My rationality had decided to abandon me." Harry nodded, slowly raising his eyes to look at Tom as he crossed the room to the door.

Tom was right. There was no need to act like something had happened because it hadn't. Harry dwelt his eyes on Tom for a couple of seconds, astonished that Tom could look so human. Jeans that fit a little too snuggly to the youth's hips and thighs-and dare Harry think his buttocks? The plain tee added a sense of humility and vulnerabiltiy to Tom, a sense that Tom wasn't the future Dark Lord. Harry raised a brow as Romulus bounded inside, leading an annoyed Septimus. He smiled. It was rather odd that Severus's and Sirius's grandfathers had a relationship when they were young but seeing the amount of mutual affection radiating from them, Harry couldn't see it as anything but right.

"Oh, Harry!" Romulus purred, resting a lanky arm on Harry's shoulders. "You look scrumptious enough to eat! Do you mind if I have a taste?" Romulus teased, releasing Harry. "You need to gain some weight. Your skin and bones in Tom's clothes and I've always thought _he's_ tiny. However," Romulus's predatory gaze wandered to Tom, "Seeing you in nothing but a towel has completely changed my perspective of you."

Tom rolled his eyes, crossing his arms in front of his chest. "Septimus, why do you bother with him? He's quite attractive-" Romulus squealed- "Other than that, he has absolutely nothing going for him. You're an intelligent boy. Can't you figure it out by yourself?"

"I, um, I," Septimus was momentarily flabbergasted, cheeks staining pink against his will. "That is not your business!" Septimus retorted. "I have no interest in that brat and I most definitely would not consider pursuing a relationship with _him_, even if I liked other boys which I don't!" He missed the flash of pain in the clear, beautiful azure eyes. "Besides, you've seen the kind of idiots he dates. I hardly merit to his standards, now do I?"

Harry cast Tom a side-long glance, puzzled by Tom's motive for beginning an argument. Romulus's demeanor slipped into another personality that was the opposite of his normal attitude. "What do you mean, you don't merit to my standards? Inform me, what _are_ my standards?" Harry shivered, having seen that gleam in his godfather's eyes many times; the glimmer of someone that could impale you on a sword just as easily as he could kiss you.

"Where do I begin?" Septimus asked mockingly, not in the least bit perturbed by Romulus. "First, with girls. All are tall, well over 69 inches and weigh less than 49 kilograms. They're blonde, usually with green or blue eyes, and let's not forget that they have to have the body of goddess. Second, with the boys. Once again, tall. I've never seen you with a boy that's less than 72 inches. Once again, they're blond or a light brunette, usually with freckles or endearing dimples. Bodies that most envy: lean, muscled, and tan. Oh but with no personalities. Yes, it's quite hard to meet the criteria."

"You notice. If you hadn't made yourself clear, I'd think you were jealous." Romulus sneered. "Are you envious of the people I'm with or is it because _I'm_ with _them_ and not _you_? Have you thought about why I date them based on their appearances? I do it because the one that I love doesn't even bother with reciprocating! This person is the exact opposite of the airheads I date because there can only be one of him, no replacement."

Harry stifled his laughter, finding the entire ordeal hilarious. Seven years of skirting around the issue and finally, it was going to happen. Septimus's eyes widened. "What? You _love_ someone? I didn't think you were even capable. Your reputation is notorious."

"I've loved him for a long, long time. He's too smart for me." Romulus chuckled, running a hand through his hair and Harry could tell that Romulus was about to lay all the cards on the table. "You're too intelligent, Septimus. I've always felt inadequate compared to you. Oh, don't give me that look. You wouldn't have told me either. I love you, Septimus. I always have."

"This is absurd! What kind of sick joke are you playing, Black?" Septimus hissed.

"This is no joke, Sep. I'm giving you my heart, if you'll have it."

"I'm not like you, Romulus. I'm not good enough for you."

"What? Are you blind? You're gorgeous!" Romulus smiled. "There's no getting out of this, Septimus. Either you can reject me or we can go somewhere a little more private and create orchestral maneuvers in the dark all day and night."

Septimus blushed. "Romulus, if we have a relationship, it's going to be for keeps. I don't want you to be going behind my back to visit your old lovers and I don't want our relationship to be based on sex. Is that clear, Romulus?"

"Of course. I wouldn't have it any other way."

"Then, let's see where this takes us."

"Seppy!" Romulus screeched, winding his arms around Septimus's waist and squeezing the life out of him. "I knew you loved me too. I'm so happy!"

"I think we'll leave," Tom interrupted the intimate moment. "Feel free to...explore one another here. Just, please, clean your mess when you're finished. Congratulations. You finally had the nerve to admit what I've known for seven years. Come on, Harry," Tom prodded Harry's arm, grinning at the gob smacked Septimus and Romulus.

Harry sharply glanced at Tom as he closed the door. "You did that on purpose, didn't you?"

"I might not know anything about love but I'm not blind. Those two have been pining at each other for seven years. I decided I'd lend a helping hand. Your influence is corrupting me." Tom shrugged, shoving his hands into his jeans. "I'm not exactly certain if I should be thanking you or cursing you. You come along and all that I have ever known becomes distorted. I don't know why you're able to affect me, only that these feelings that I know you from someplace are becoming much more frequent and stronger. I have yet to explain that."

"Maybe we're connected to one another."

Tom chuckled. "I hardly doubt that unless you're considering yin and yang however we would have to be lovers in order for that to be an option. The only remaining option is that we were twins separated at birth but that's even more preposterous then the former. I see you're becoming uncomfortable again." Riddle frowned at Harry. "I told you that I meant nothing. If the idea of us being lovers is so revolting then I suggest you clear your mind of the memory."

Harry was taken aback by the fury in Tom's words. Was he actually _hurt_ by Harry's blatant anxiety? Harry gave a disgruntled sigh. "It's not that I'm disgusted by it, Tom. I'm straight and the thought of being gay is a little disturbing. It's a taboo-"

"It's a taboo set by Muggles," Tom snarled, garnet flecking emerald. "Are you thick, Harry? Have you even _looked_ at the students here? A quarter of them are gay and are not ashamed because of a stupid law that Muggles forced upon everyone. You honestly think that Romulus would be so damn casual with his relationships if he was afraid of being hated? You-"

"Then why did Ghislaine-"

"Because I wouldn't date her!" Tom growled, frustrated. He moodily kicked a piece of debris from his path. "She's an egotistical brat that knows her appearance can get her anything she desires. She tried to seduce me, Harry." Melancholic green eyes snapped to Harry. "How do you think I felt when my body wouldn't respond to her ministrations?" Tom's voice was barely audible. "I knew before she realized that I wasn't reacting and told her to leave. She decided that I was gay and has wanted me dead ever since. Then one night, I saw Romulus shagging one of his boyfriends and became aroused by it. Do you have any idea what it's like to _know_ you're more attracted to the same sex? Even after what happened to me when I was a child, I couldn't deny that my body longed for male interaction. That was four years ago. I've tried my hardest to ignore it and I thought I had beaten those desires."

"Tom..." Harry whispered. How on earth did Tom survive the ordeals he'd been subjected to? A lesser man would have crumbled. Were these the reasons for his becoming Lord Voldemort? Had something even worse happened later to cause the shift to permanently become the Dark Lord? Perhaps, Harry would be there to witness the occurrence and maybe, prevent it.

"I don't feel like talking about this anymore. I know you must hungry. We can go to Hogsmeade, if you'd like."

"As in me and you?"

"Yes."

"You're coming with me?"

Tom laughed. "Hopefully I'll give someone a heart attack for seeing me journey outside of my rooms. It's a beautiful day, we should make the most of it until our game." Tom shoved the main doors open, taking a deep breath of air. "I would hate to destroy something as lovely as nature. Muggles do. Muggles are slowly destroying this planet and although we may not be alive to see it, Earth will crumble because of what they're doing to harm the world. They can murder one another senselessly-death of humans doesn't bother me but once they start to cause pain to the planet, their deaths are even more encouraged."

Harry nodded, enthralled by how serene and angelic Tom appeared. The sun formed a halo on his dark hair, the wind ruffled the sable tresses, a faint blush stained Tom's cheeks as the cool air whipped around him. He was a vision of beauty. "You're odd, Tom. You can talk of becoming the next Dark Lord and yet the destruction of the planet means more to you then anyone I've ever been around in my life. Why? Is it because of what happened when you were little?"

"A bit. I just don't like seeing something innocent being corrupted, that's all. The planet cannot fight back and there is no one to defend it. I'm one person. I hardly have the power to control the actions of others but one day, I will." Tom paused in his tracks, steady gaze not leaving Harry. "Would you fight by my side, Harry? I wouldn't want you as one of my followers. I want you to be there with me, as my equal. It's silly to ask you, I know, but if it should happen and I have my chance to lead this festering world, would you support me or would you fight against me?"

"Tom, I don't know." Harry's heart leapt to his throat. Tom wanted him to be his equal, his partner. "I'm flattered that you'd even take into account that I might make a worthy ally but killing innocents just does not appeal to me. I'm sorry."

"It's alright. I didn't expect for you to agree but I thought I would give it a chance. Just know that if we should ever cross paths on the battlefield, you had better hide or run. I don't have the heart to kill you, Harry. It's strange. I could murder any number of people that I want without a care but when it comes to you, I don't want your blood on my hands."

**_Perhapsss you are more of an idiot then I thought you were,_** a voice came to Tom and Harry's ears. A gorgeous corn snake was slithering towards them. **_Tom, I have not ssseen you in a while. Have you been avoiding me?_** The tone was light and teasing.

"**_Of course not, lovely. I have been very busy." _**Tom held his hand out, smiling as the snake eagerly wrapped herself around his neck.

_**Who isss thisss you have brought with you, Tom? **_

"**_His name is Harry. He's very beautiful, isn't he?" _**Harry's eyes widened, not certain if he heard right. Tom Riddle has just called him beautiful. He wasn't sure if he should be more touched or disturbed by the compliment. Then it dawned on Harry; Tom had no idea that Harry understood ParselTongue. **_"He confuses me, Caelestis. I do believe this is the first time I've ever been so puzzled."_**

_**There isss no need to be ssscared, Tom. Your heart cannot help who it choosssesss. I may be only a common sssnake, Tom. You need love just asss much asss anyone elssse. He looksss honessst enough. Doesss he not return your affectionsss?**_

"_**You see, I'm not sure if I have feelings for him or not. I've never been in love, you know that. That's why I'm confused."**_

Harry watched the emotions dance across Tom's face. There was so much inner turmoil that Harry felt he had to intervene, even if that meant risking who he was. **_"You don't have to be confused, Tom." _**Tom and Caelestis turned to Harry. Tom's lips were parted in complete and utter shock, unable to speak a single word. **_"She is right. You deserve love but I'm not sure if I can offer that to you. I would, Tom. I honestly would but I'm just as confused as you are. I've never felt more protected in my life then when I'm with you. I don't think I've ever been this happy, either. We're friends but to us being more: I haven't the slightest clue. I've never considered having a relationship with another boy and like you, I feel something when I'm with you but if it's love or just plain affection towards a friends, I don't know. With time, I might be able to tell you but you need to know that in three months I'm going home."_**

"**_Who _are_ you, Harry? How can you speak ParselTongue?! I am the heir of Salazzar Slytherin and suddenly, there's another one?! How _could _keep this from me, Harry?! You're almost an exact replica of me and that terrifies me! Now you're telling me you're going to desert me in three months?! I can't deal with this, Harry. I don't have any strength left." _** Tom gently set Caelestis on the ground before he bolted to Hogwart's.

"TOM!" Harry yelled but his scream was met with silence. Harry sighed. "Why do I always mess everything up and why is he always running from me?"

**_Tom hasss lived a difficult life. _**Caelestis slithered towards Harry. **_I have lived for decadesss longer than you both. I have ssseen many thingsss. Heard many thingsss. Tom is full of anguisssh and he's terribly confusssed. I have known him sssince he wasss a child. I came here with him in order to keep him sssafe. However, he hasss become a man and he mussst make his own choicesss now. I am asssking you not to hurt him, Harry. No, I am begging for you not to. I love him like he isss one of my own brood. You need to sssearch your heart jusst as he needsss to sssearch his own._**

"_**How do I do that? This is Tom Riddle! He's not some common idiot. He's more complex then most people know. I don't want to knowingly hurt him, Caelestis but I fear that I will only break his heart if we were to pursue a romantic relationship. I am leaving in three months and I'll never return to this place. How do you think Tom would cope with that?"**_

_**Ssstay here, Harry. Ssstay with Tom. I am going to sssee if he isss alright. You might want to keep your dissstance from him for a while. Being in your presence might inadvertently caussse his fragile emotions to collapsse.**_

Harry frowned as Caelestis disappeared into the grass. Perhaps she was correct. He did need to search his heart for the cause of the awakening emotions inside of him. He needed to know if he did in fact feel more than friendly love towards Tom Riddle. If he were to be honest then he would have to admit that he was frightened of what he might find. Love, lust, or another more deeper emotion that none could escape.

X X X

5 pages. Wow. I normally do not write this much for fanfiction.

There was interest sparked for my two stories being published in 2005. The first one is titled, The Chosen One and unfortunately does not involve an slash but it's fantasy. The other is the first book of thirteen for the Love, Lost, and Lessons Saga. It's partly finished and yes, it does contain slash. I was extremely surprised that a story involving gay characters would be published! Look for them early 2005.

Thanks to: **goody2sho, Kiharu-sama, ddz008, lil-black fox, Dassani, HoshiHikari4ever _I liked your suggestion and will definitely use it! Thank you! _Angelic Candy _Harry's never had an actual relationship outside of the Cho Incident so he doesn't exactly know if he likes boys or girls. And no, Lord Voldemort does not know anything about where Harry is. Later on, well, you'll see. WINK. _Sweet-Pea Fairy, Celestial Light _Yes, the note to Dumbledore will bring about trouble, _I luv Kai, pinksakuya, bobby, Gia, slashgurl, Queen of Slash, Tigris T Draconis, Wanamaker, borne-shadow-child _My pen name is Alethea Valentine. _super-sailor-saturn39, Caecuslupa, HecateDeMort, KendaSakuyamo, snuffles, tripchick, riantlykalospic _Aleron's not gay and neither is Corin... hee hee. I figured putting Romulus x Septimus would provide some, oh, I almost gave out too much information! _UsagiLovesDuochan _Who doesn't love Duo? I know Heero does. Happy ending for the lovely bishonen? You'll have to keep reading to find out. _Shadyfaerie, Lily, fangirl**

I am in shock I recieved 29 reviews! Thank you!


	6. Chapter Six

Title: On this Cross

Warnings: Male x Male

Disclaimers: Not mine

_I'd give anything to give me to you  
Can you forget the world that you thought you knew  
If you want me,  
Come and find me  
Nothing's stopping you so please release me_

_**Evanescence- Anything for You**_

Chapter Six

Tom glanced at Harry from the window, twisting his hand into his hair. "Why did you lie?" he whispered, leaning his head against the wall, diverting his gaze from the figure rapidly disappearing from view. He wouldn't cry. He was stronger than that. He wouldn't let one measly _boy_ affect him this much. Tom could not prevent the few tears that coursed his cheeks. Angrily, he wiped them on the back of his hand. How could this be happening to him!? Why was he even surprised? He was such a fool for getting too involved with Harry. "Damnit!"

_**Tom? What isss the matter with you, my child?**_

"**_It hurts! It hurts more than I thought it ever could, Cael." _**Tom collapsed onto the floor, wary for any interruptions. **_"I know that I care about him. I know that I would gladly lay down my life to protect his. How can he change me? I've never wanted to keep someone safe as much as I do him. What's wrong with me? I'm scared." _**Tom whimpered.

Caelestis gently wrapped herself around his throat, offering as much comfort as she could. **_Becaussse you are finally realizzzing that life cannot be lived alone and dependent on yoursssself. All humansss crave love, even if they become the darkessst sssoul imaginable. As for being ssscared? Do you not think Harry isss asss frightened asss you are? There isss no reassson to flee him all the time. _**Caelestis flicked her tongue to lick the boy's saline stained cheeks. **_I often wisssh that I wasss human ssso that I could raissse you._**

"_**You did, Cael. Without you, I don't think I could have survived and I'll always be grateful to you for that."**_

If snakes could smile, Caelestis would have done that. **_Then do me a favor, Tom. Forgive Harry for being naïve. Forgive him for not telling you the truth becaussse I have good reassson to believe that hisss sssecretsss that he carriesss in hisss heart are tormenting him and being with you all the time isss causssing more pain. I want you to try to give him time. Be hisss friend until he hasss decided where his heart laysss._**

"**_Patience is not one of my strongest virtues." _**Tom smiled, tenderly stroking the snake's head. **_"I don't have many morals to speak of. I lost those when I was a brat. Cael, am I stupid for thinking someone like Harry could love me? He's so good, Cael. He's nice and compassionate and he's so _unlike_ me. I'm afraid I'll corrupt him."_**

_**My Tom, the only way you could corrupt him would be to sssteal hiss innocccenccce. **_

"_**I know what you're hinting at. I wouldn't rape him. I wouldn't let him go through the hell I did. My whole view of love was destroyed that night when those men had their way with me. Then, those mishaps with Ghislaine and Nevan? Ghislaine made me understand that I did in fact prefer men to women and Nevan...Do I even have to go into that one?"**_

**_No. I know what he did to you. You had just healed from all the terrible wrongdoingssss at the orphanage when he decided to ssstake his claim on you. Ten isss too young to go through that, again. He warped you more than the pedophilesss at the orphange ever could have. He wove a falssse sssenssse of sssecurity. You were vulnerable and you fell for it. Tom, you need to hear thisss. _**Caelestis carefully tightened her grip on Tom's neck, making the boy listen. **_He manipulated you, my ssson. I warned you about him, I told you what he would do but you chossse not to believe me. Nevan broke your will to live. He broke ever fiber of humanity that had been inssside of you. He sssssculpted you into what you are today. It doesss not mean that you cannot trussst again. Often timesss you must leap into love and ignore the consssequencesss. Forget Nevan and Ghissslaine. Clossse your eyesss and focusss on Harry. _**Tom obeyed, jade eyes sliding close. **_Tell me, what do you sssee when you think of him?_**

"**_I see us. We're by the lake. It's autumn and the moon's shining and the stars are so clear. We're holding hands, staring into the water. The wind's dancing around us. He rests against me. He's so beautiful. I want to kiss him. Wait...there's someone else here." _**Tom's voice was trembling, brows furrowing. **_"The figure's robed. I can see his eyes. They're....red. Slitted pupils. Pale, paler then any ghost and thin, emaciated. He's....he's me."_** Tom's eyes snapped open, entire body quivering. "**_What the hell was that? I don't understand."_**

_**You need to take a nap, Tom. Your game is in a few hoursss. I am going to find me a brief repassst. I expect you to be sssleeping.**_

Tom swallowed the foreboding lump in his throat as Caelestis vanished. It was not a premonition. It felt like the man...himself...was there in reality. Why did it frighten him? Was this the person he would become or what he already was? Could it be prevented?

X X X

Harry lounged at one of the bistro style tables by the quaint Café Fleur. The betrayal in Tom's eyes had nearly shattered him right then and there. Harry grimly stirred his latte, his reflection swirling in the murky liquid. Tom Riddle preferred males to females. He'd been raped when he was a small child. He was an avid nature lover. He blamed Muggles for all that was wrong with him; his inability to trust or love. Tom Riddle became Lord Voldemort after he graduated Hogwart's or, he was in the process of finalizing selling his soul to become _him._ That meant, Tom Riddle was definitely on the verge of delving into the shadows. Harry didn't know how _he _could possibly prevent Tom's change, especially now.

Harry and Tom has admitted they were attracted to one another. It might not have been spoken in that context but the confusion they both felt was more then enough to suffice. Harry felt his stomach knotting uncomfortably. _Attracted_ to Tom Riddle. Tom Riddle, also known as the Dark Lord. Harry couldn't deny it any longer. Tom was most definitely physically beautiful. Even a fool had to see that. Internally? Harry found Tom to be an enigma, like a maze that couldn't be solved; a maze that Harry didn't intend to solve either. A complex puzzle that even the most talented genius couldn't finish.

"Harry?" Harry snapped from his musings to meet the hazel gaze of his grandfather. Octavious smiled, taking a seat at the table. "I don't see Riddle or the rest of his brood with you? Have a spat or did you just need to escape it all?"

"We aren't fighting. They're asleep. It's only 9:30. Where's _your_ gang?"

Octavious laughed. "I don't _want_ to know. Last night they were plastered. Are you prepared for the match today? It's been rumored that you're an excellent Seeker. I'm eager to see you in action." He rose to his feet. "You're not like the other Slytherin's. That's why I'm warning you. One day, Tom Riddle will be destroyed, I'll do it with my own hands if I have to. I'll break him and make him wish he'd never been born, never came to Hogwart's, and _never _met me. You had better not involve yourself too much with Riddle or you'll be hurt in the end as well. I've seen it, Harry. I've seen what he does."

"What do you mean? What he_ does?_"

"He might act innocent with you, Harry but he's far from that. Watch yourself around him. Don't get attached, I'm telling you. Riddle's world will come to an end soon. I'll make sure of it."

Harry frowned, a sense of foreboding etching itself into his heart and mind as Octavious ventured from Hogsmeade. Octavious had to have had something to do with Tom's changing into Voldemort. What did Octavious do? Was it _all_ Octavious's fault? He wanted to protect Tom yet he also wanted to protect himself; from eventual heart break that would come from any romantic liaison formed between him and Tom. An affair that would pain them both. A tryst that Harry didn't know if he wanted or not, a vexing riddle that was plaguing his mind.

X X X

Septimus glanced at Romulus, silently asking one another the same question as Harry trudged into the Slytherin locker room to dress for the game, avoiding Tom who was doing likewise to Harry. What in the hell had happened between them once they'd left? Romulus shrugged, receiving a patented glare from Septimus that would have put Tom to shame. Romulus groaned, doing as his lover was silently bidding. Romulus sneaked a peek at Septimus as he went towards Tom, proud that his significant other had the courage to confront Tom. "Are you alright?"

Harry peeled his sweater off. "I'm fine." Harry glanced at Tom who was currently coldly ignoring Septimus. "I'm not stupid. You're wondering why we're not speaking, right? It's our business, not yours. Anything that happens between Tom and myself is our affair. We'll deal with it." Then, those gorgeous eyes were on him and Harry felt himself shiver with the unexpected emotions seering his heart. They could not continue like this. "Get Septimus away from him. You'll only upset him."

Romulus growled, slamming his hand against the wall behind Harry. "I've known Tom for seven years. I know a lot more about him then _you _do! Nothing upsets Tom and I'm not about to let _you_ hurt him. I won't let you use him and abuse him. He doesn't deserve it. I don't know much about his past but from what I _do_ know, it would kill him if you were to do anything remotely painful. He's fucking fragile, okay?! Oh, he's powerful when it comes to magic or academics or Quidditch or brute physical strength but when it comes to his psyche, he's as weak as babe. That's _why_ he keeps everyone from seeing the real Tom Riddle. I suggest you tell me what the fuck is going on between you right now before I beat you into a blood pulp, you little shit."

Completely taken aback by the fury radiating from Romulus, Harry nodded, acquiescing to his demand. "Not here. Do we have time to go somewhere and talk about it?" Though Harry dreaded telling Romulus what had transpired between him and Tom, he knew he might feel a bit better to have it all in the open with another besides himself.

"We'll miss practice but we have about twenty minutes. Come on, we can talk in Professor Koka's office." Harry protested Romulus's hold on his hand as he determinedly led Harry from the locker room, Tom's gaze on them the entire time. Romulus wound the corner, throwing a door open. "Koka won't care if we borrow her office. She's an airhead but as a teacher, she's phenomenal. Alright, spill it. Tell me everything. You better not leave a single detail out."

"We've been getting pretty close since I came. It's kind of hard not to when you're living with him. I'm not going to tell you all that's happened because Tom might not like it if I do. The basic gist of the story is that I told Tom that I was leaving in three months to go back home. I didn't think he'd overreact with my news but he did and now he hates my guts. That's that."

Romulus snorted incredulously. "You're getting _close_ to Tom? Oh you have to elaborate for me to really judge what's going on."

Frustrated, Harry ran his hands through his hair. "If you tell a single soul, including Septimus, I'll kill you with my bare hands." The intensity in Harry's eyes had Romulus believing that Harry would and could make due his threat. "Tom's told me about his past, well, as much as he wants me to know. There are still some missing pieces and I figure he'll tell me when he's ready. He's told me about Ghislaine and what became a result of it. For Merlin's sake, he _cried_ in front of me. Albeit he was sleeping but he didn't stir when I held him. He didn't wake up and hex me because I was comforting him. God, Romulus, do you have any idea how _awful_ his nightmares truly are?"

"I know." Romulus nodded jadedly. "When he was living with us in the dorm rooms, he'd have to use silencing spells on his bed to prevent from waking us. Sometimes he forgot. Once you hear the amount of anguish that he goes through, you don't see him in the same light ever again."

"That's so true. I saw that he was human and not that asshole personality that he keeps as a guard. I saw the _real_ Tom Riddle, Romulus. And he's beautiful. Perfect. A fallen angel. I could describe what I saw in a million different words. I _liked_ what I saw. Yes, I haven't known him as long as you have but there's something special about Tom. I want to find out what that special quality is but I'm confused and terrified. I don't like other boys in the romantic sense. It just doesn't appeal to me, sorry if I offend you." Romulus waved it aside. "At least, I thought it didn't. He tried to kiss me this morning."

"What?!" Romulus screeched, eyes widening impossibly. "This has got to be good."

"I don't know why it happened, maybe it was just the mood. He was telling me about his past and he asked me if he was evil and I told him he wasn't. Next thing I knew he was touching my face. I played my own part though. I touched him back. I got scared and moved away from him. He told me that he did things he wasn't aware of when he was talking about his past but I don't believe that. I think he knew what he was doing."

"Of course he did, you dolt! Tom's not an innocent person. He knows exactly what his body wants and he's spent of a hell of a long time ignoring the needs of his teenage body. He might seem superior to us but he's going through the same things we are. I'm not stupid either, Harry. Tom's lonely, more lonely then I could even _begin_ to imagine but he has good reason to be the way he is and I know you know what I'm talking about! Is that what scares you? Tom's celibacy?"

"No! I'm scared because I reacted to what he did. I'm not gay. I'm not. I don't find anything attractive about other boys-"

"Look, why don't you convince yourself before you try and convince me?" Romulus sighed, patting Harry's arm comfortingly. "There's no shame in liking other boys, Harry. You can't prevent what your heart feels. Maybe it's only Tom that gets you hot and bothered."

"No because I find you attractive as well."

"Me?" Romulus batted his lashes. "I'm flattered but I'm taken and I don't think Tom would like me hitting on his crush." Sobering, he took a deep breath and did his best to give sound advice. "Either you can be miserable in a loveless relationship with a woman, have dozens of kids, live in a quaint house and be repressed your entire, miserable life. Or, you can ignore what society set as a standard and focus on making yourself happy. I don't know what warped your sense of right and wrong but most pure-bloods don't give a damn about supposed 'taboo's' that some of the half-blood's bring in here. What can make you happy is Tom. That's evident in the way you blush and the way your eyes sparkle when you're around him. Even right now, you're eyes are twinkling. I'm not going to press you into pursuing any sort of relationship with Tom. You have to decide on your own time if that's what you truly want. However, I suggest you two make-up before Tom burns the entire school down to the ground."

"But I told him I was leaving! He looked like I'd betrayed him!"

"Moron. I don't believe you're leaving. You'll stay here because face it, you belong here. You have a reason to stay, don't you?" Winking, Romulus ruffled Harry's hair. "Tom's a good reason to remain. Who knows? You could help each other."

"I'll apologize to him but I doubt that I can stay here past three months. I'm sorry."

"All I'm asking is that you consider the possibility of staying."

"Alright. I will." Harry knew it was impossible. There was no earthly chance of him remaining in 1945. He had to admit, he enjoyed this place immensely but Harry knew it was for the wrong reasons. It was because Romulus and Sirius had an uncanny resemblance in both personality and appearance and in Harry's mind, Romulus could replace Sirius but Harry knew that was silly. There was no replacing Sirius. Then, there was Tom. Harry shook his head. He didn't want to think about Tom, not yet. He needed to focus on the game instead.

X X X

"You had better not disappoint the team," Aleron smiled charmingly, patting Harry's shoulder. "I have yet to understand exactly _why_ you're as good as you are. You just don't seem the type to be a Quidditch player. You're more like Septimus. Oh and don't think that Ghislaine forgot your blatant rejection of her. She's quite serious about pursuing you. Useless woman, she is." Harry smirked, knowing that Aleron's insult to the girl was moot. Obviously Ghislaine and Aleron married, producing Lucius. Harry stared at Aleron harder, seeing most of Lucius in his father but there was an unmistakable amount of Ghislaine in their son. "What is it?"

"Nothing, just thinking. I promise that I'll win. I always do."

"Becoming too cocky is ill-advised, Harry." Harry froze mid-step, heart thumping painfully loud in his chest at the euphonious tones gently interrupting his and Aleron's conversation. "You're good but having your ego swell with pride from the fact is idiotic. I will not have one of my players make an error due to his extreme confidence in his own abilities. Aleron, would you mind excusing us? Harry has not yet been versed in the strategies that we have developed against Ravenclaw." Aleron sent a curt nod at Harry and a glare at Tom before joining Corin on the field.

Tom was completely indifferent, focused solely on the game ahead of them. "Ravenclaw's speed is the best there is. However, when strength is concerned, they lack considerably. Romulus and Aleron will be acting as Beaters since they're tougher then all of the Ravenclaw team combined and their aim is deadly accurate. Though, taking Romulus from Chaser will definitely limit our speed. Our second-string Chaser is Kasch. Not as quick as Romulus but I suppose he'll suffice considering it's important we target Ravenclaw's Chasers." Tom laughed quietly, almost as if he were hiding the fact that he _could_ laugh from his peers. "These are not your concern. Kearney Davies's speed rivals your own and I suggest that you keep your head in the game and not in the clouds. One wrong move and you'll be injured. Davies takes no prisoners when playing Quidditch, it's more then just a game to him just as it's more then _just_ a game to _me._ I've devoted most of my life to this sport. When I was little, this was the only aspect of wizard life that I knew." Tom smiled, seeming to be reminiscing. "I was fascinated. I only heard about it from a few Daily Prophet's that I'd managed to come across. It's silly but it kept me sane, knowing that there were others like me in this world. I was turning eleven and a letter was sent to me from Hogwart's. I was desperate to leave the orphanage. To just, escape all that had happened. To see a real Quidditch game. I'd studied the game enough to be drafted onto the Slytherin team during first year. I was a Chaser. The fastest that any had ever seen. I was so honored to be a member but, my attitude kept my teammates from getting close to me. Professor Russe thought it best that I keep to the sidelines. Being a Keeper kept me from interacting with the rest of the team and ended most of the distrust and disloyalty." Tom's chuckles were hollow. "I suppose I drive everyone away from me, don't I, Harry? I've driven you away."

"Please, I'm not ready to talk about this. After the game, if you want."

"I'd like that. Well, good luck and remember what I said about Davies."

Harry could only nod, feeling his intestines twirl in his stomach. Tom blamed himself? How? _Why_? It was Harry's fault for lying in the first place. Harry sighed, shooting to the sky. This was hardly fair. What Harry wanted was to go home. Truthfully, he longed for it. That would end the confusion and arguments. If he went home, there would be no Tom Riddle with his gorgeous eyes, lovely face, sweet voice.... Just Lord Voldemort. A monster hell bent on destroying any one with non-magic blood in their veins. Then why was his heart aching at the prospect of abandoning Tom?

"Welcome to the first match of the season. Slytherin versus Ravenclaw! A new addition, new student, has been added to the roster this year! Harold Wood from Beauxbatons! Wicked fast as the rumors go, he's definitely going to be competition for Kearney Davies!" Harry toned the commentator out, eyes sweeping over the crowd. Dumbledore. Harry's stomach clenched furiously. The letter! Controlling the growing panic, Harry immediately looked towards another object. Unless Albus had contacted his past self somehow, then Harry was a strange boy trespassing onto school property. It was decided. Harry would _have _to confront Albus after the game.

The Snitch was released and that was all Harry could see or hear. He didn't notice Kearney trailing behind him nor did he notice the bludger's rapidly being batted at him from the Ravenclaw Beaters. Unfortunately for Harry, a figure in the distance took his attention rapidly away from the Snitch. Tom Riddle. Elegant and poised, keeping all of Ravenclaw's quaffles from reaching their target. So incredibly beautiful and alluring that Harry narrowly missed the bludger aimed at his head. Shaking his head, Harry returned to the game, wanting to make Tom proud of him by winning the game for him.

Less than three seconds and Harry's hand closed over the Snitch. A wild cheer arose from those supporting Slytherin. The team wildly cheered, jeering at Ravenclaw. Harry laughed, holding the Snitch close to his chest. Kearney amiably smiled, clapping Harry on his back. "Well done, ole' lad. You gave me a run for my money and I have to say, I'm impressed! I look forward to going against you some other time."

Harry smiled in return as Kearney went to join his defeated team. Harry looked for Tom in the crowd of people rushing to greet him, curious as to who the newcomer was and exactly how had become so good. Several girls flashed charming smiles at him but all Harry saw was the quiet, crooked smile that Harry associated with Tom when he was in thought. Harry walked towards Tom, the people around him invisible. He paused a few steps in front of Tom, holding the Snitch in his palm. "For you."

Tom's smile deepened, the dimples clearly detectable. "Thank you Harry."

"Harold Wood, I presume?" Professor Dumbledore inquired politely.

"Yes, sir. I am. I meant to talk to you."

"Then you can talk to me now. I'm sure Mr. Riddle doesn't mind, do you?"

"Of course not, sir." Harry could only stare at the tightly strained civility between the two. Those twin orbs of garnet flecked emerald landed on Harry and for once, Harry didn't shudder. "Our discussion will have to be postponed for later this evening. Good afternoon, Professor." Dipping his head slightly, Tom rounded on his heel and marched towards the locker rooms.

"Quite an interesting young man. Dangerous as well. I've learned that you've been rooming with him. I must commend you on your pity towards him."

"Pity?" Harry bewilderedly stared at Albus. "I _don't_ pity Tom, I'm sorry to say. I'm rooming with him because he offered since there were no other rooms available and I was not keen on sharing the same bed with another boy."

Albus chuckled, blue eyes twinkling. "There are plenty of spare beds, Mr. Wood. Do not look at me like that. I'm not senile yet at any rate. Tom must have lied to you. What are his intentions towards you, Harry? Has he made those clear?"

"I don't understand. Look, you need to read this before I go on." Harry handed the letter from his Dumbledore to this past one. "Everything you need to know about why I'm here and why I'm impersonating a student is all in there."

"Is that so?" Albus opened the letter, reading it hastily.

_Dear Albus,_

_This is not the first time and most definitely not the last time I will contact you regarding events in the future. It's disconcerting that I would have to keep in touch with you just to remind me of my past but alas, it cannot be helped. I will not avoid this with idle pleasantries. Harry Potter, the one that was spoken of in the Prophecy, will be joining you. Lord Voldemort's power is growing substantially and I fear that it is impossible to defeat him with the limited information we have about his weaknesses. That is why I have sent Harry to you. He will be befriending Tom Riddle in order to learn what Tom's weakness is. He will be sent home in three months, whether or not he discovers the truth to his mission. _

_Harry's young and inexperienced with a person like Tom Riddle. Tom's exquisite features and mysterious personality have most under his control the second upon meeting. I'm asking you to prevent that from happening. I will not see Harry seduced by him. The boy's heart is too kind to recognize the dangers associated with Tom. He would rather kill himself then ignore someone as desperately lonely as Tom. That is why I am trusting you with my utmost confidence to keep him safe from Tom's ulterior motives regarding Harry. Harry is your charge now and should be treated as your own son. Keep Tom Riddle away from Harry._

_With the best of luck,_

_Albus Dumbledore, Headmaster of Hogwart's _

"I see," Albus murmured. "Apparently my dear future self has forgotten that Tom Riddle isn't completely soul less. I've seen him smile more then I ever have in my life since you came into his life. However, I will do as he asks and keep you safe from Tom."

"You don't have that right! Tom isn't going to turn his back on me. I care about him and sure as hell am not going to let you tell me what I can and cannot do!" Growling, Harry pivoted, angrily stomping towards the door, slamming it shut behind him.

"You forgot to mention how incredibly obstinate the boy is and I'm afraid that your wishes will not be coming true for, what you've predicted is already unfolding." Albus hummed a little song to himself, carefully destroying the letter. "And I will not stop it."

X X X

Thanks to all my reviewers, you're all so amazing and I appreciate your kind words and advice greatly. As any true novelist at heart will tell you, it's the readers that make the entire process worthwhile. :)

I would individually thank you all but, I'll do it next chapter. Thanks once again.


	7. Chapter Seven

Title: On this Cross

Warnings: Male x Male

Disclaimers: Not mine

_But then I find ...you here  
Through your eyes everythings clear  
And I'm home inside your arms  
But I'm alone for now ...alone for now_

_**Staind- Safe Place**_

Chapter Seven

Harry Potter was beyond angry: he was _furious._ What _right_ did Dumbledore-both past and present-have to control what went on in his life? He barely could keep it straight from one day to another. Tom had promised not to harm him and Harry believed him. It was Tom who shouldn't trust _him _yet Harry knew he could not tell Tom his secrets. To do so would be to jeopardize the intent of the mission; Voldemort's weakness. So far the only vulnerability that Tom had shown him was regarding his dreams of his past. Other than that, Tom's hatred for Muggles was prominent in nearly every conversation they had. Harry could feel his anger deserting him. It was not like Albus did not have a good reason to prevent Harry and Tom to _actually_ become friends.

However, was Albus correct? That the only reason Harry cared for Tom was because of how alone he was? The two were alike in so many different areas that it was almost as if he was changing himself while doing his best to save Tom Riddle's soul. Was he selfish in relishing in the company of the lonely young man, a youth starving for affection just as much as Harry was? Tom was cold towards his peers and supposed friends while retaining a warmth for Harry. Could it be possible that Tom was leading him along into believing that he cared for him in order to only cause him pain for his own sadistic glee? To seduce him? Tom changed personalities rapidly. Did _Tom_ in fact care for him? Did _Voldemort_ want to use him and abuse him? Which personality was the dominant in Tom's shattered mind?

Questions with no answers plagued Harry's conscious. Questions he rightly could _not_ answer without leading into even more vexing puzzles. Harry leaned against the wall, pressing the heel of his hand against his forehead, eyes closing. He damned Dumbledore for the doubt creeping into his heart. Tom and those beautiful green eyes that sent waves of emotions through him. A week ago, Harry would have never thought another male was gorgeous. Three days ago, Harry had glimpsed a peek of Heaven when gazing into Tom Riddle's eyes, a heaven that Harry yearned to lose himself into. Then, just as radiant as Heaven was, Hell would become prominent. The green became red and that was when Harry's doubts surfaced.

"Lost in thought, Harry?"

Harry blinked, snapping from his musings to see Ghislaine smirking at him. "Ghislaine? What are you doing here?" Harry ignored the queasiness in his stomach as the stunning blonde approached him, strides a seductive trance meant to entrance the male eye into a web of desire. The predatory gleam in the woman's eyes had Harry backing away from her. "I'm not interested in you."

"Of course you are." Ghislaine smiled mockingly. "I don't believe that you're a faggot, Harry." Two seconds and Ghislaine's wand was pointed at Harry's chest. The violet eyes darkened. "I can take over your mind, you know. I can have my way with you whether you consent or not. Now, we can play by my rules or we can play by yours; I win regardless."

Harry shook his head, exhausted mentally. "I don't want you at all, Ghislaine. You're warped if you think I do. Your personality is enough to make me hate you. I don't want you to touch me, there's no telling where you've been or more precisely, whose bed you've shared. Put your wand away. I'm not going to fight you."

"Who says we're going to fight?" Ghislaine laughed, prodding Harry's chest with her wand. "I take what I want and I want you. You cannot-"

"Cannot what?"

"Tom!" Harry and Ghislaine's voices were one. The fire burning in the scarlet flecked green eyes was enough to cause Harry to shudder. Ghislaine sneered, promptly ignoring Harry to face Tom. "Came to protect your little pet? Did it occur to you that he might not want you? He's not a dirty little cock-sucker like _you_ are, Riddle."

"Still angsting from my rejection of your less then adequate services?" Tom laughed. "It doesn't matter if Harry wants me or not. I do know that he's not interested in you. Most men aren't. You're just convenient when our hormones become too powerful for us to control. There are plenty of-how did you term it-cock-suckers who have been with you that have decided that being with other men is much more enjoyable then sharing your bed."

The most evil smirk that Harry had ever witnessed in his existence curled Ghislaine's lips, lavender eyes an almost deep wine hue. "It's a shame that Nevan chose to defile you with his perversion." Tom's nasty smile vanished immediately. Harry glanced at Tom, heart tightening at the lost expression that Tom wore so blatantly that Harry was positive he was seeing things. It was there, though, when Harry looked again. The pain was etched in his eyes and in his pale face. "Oh, that's right, no one knows about Nevan, do they? But I do. I slept with him a few years ago and he told me all about this sexy little boy named Tom. He described you perfectly. He even got off on pretending to re-enact your rape. It made me even randier when he told me all that he did to you. How he-"

"Enough!" Harry yelled, wand threateningly close to Ghislaine. "I swear, one more word, and I'll kill you where you stand. You have no right to talk to Tom like that. You have even less of a right to discuss his past. If you go near him, I _will_ kill you, no regrets." Ghislaine scowled. "You think I'm lying to you? You want to die this young?"

"You wouldn't dare-"

"I would," Harry said coldly. "Leave. Now."

"I will but this is far from over."

The second Ghislaine was gone, Harry turned to Tom. "Tom...are you okay? Do you want to...talk about what Ghislaine was?" The utter hopelessness crossing Tom's visage was enough to cause Harry's bravado to vanish immediately. "Tom?"

"I was supposed to keep you safe from her."

"What?"

Tom collapsed to the floor, resting against the wall, listless green eyes shadowed. "I promised you that I wouldn't let Ghislaine cause you any pain. It would seem that I was the one who needed protecting. I didn't expect her to know about...about _him._ I had thought that that part of my past was gone, that I'd never have to deal with facing it except in my dreams. You must think I'm pathetic, don't you? That Tom Riddle, the cruelest bastard at Hogwart's needs to be kept safe from the boogie man."

Harry sank down beside of Tom. "Pathetic? No. Someone that needs to be cared for? Yes."

"You don't understand," Tom said, sighing. "I don't know who I am anymore, Harry. I told you what happened when I was a child. Believe it or not, I actually healed from those scars. It was when I was ten that an occurrence happened to change me into what I am right now. Nevan was an older boy at the orphanage and the only one who did not treat me like a freak. He seemed interested in me and he wanted to my friend. Oh, he wanted to be my friend but not the kind I had thought. He raped me, Harry. He raped me repeatedly for months. I trusted him. He shattered my psyche, my heart, my body, and my soul, even. Do you see why I'm like this, Harry? Why I don't trust anyone or fall in love? I don't know _what _love is."

"But you can't let that dictate who you are! Your friends care about you. _I_ care about you and I'm not going to let you just give up and become something you'll regret, something that would make everyone's lives a living hell."

The flashback of what Tom saw entered his mind. "Harry...how did you get that scar?"

Harry's eyes widened, not even realizing that Tom had noticed his famous scar. "I...I really don't want to talk about it. Why do you ask?"

"I'm just curious. It's very oddly shaped, you know. Like a lightning bolt. Not a normal scar in the least bit." Tom gently moved aside Harry's hair, touching the scar tenderly. "You told me that the girl who you'd been intimate with, her lover had been killed. Did the killer hurt you as well?" Harry's heart skipped several beats, terror rearing it's ugly head. "Who is he?"

"N...no one."

"I would prefer you did not lie to me, Harry. I've been lied to by everyone. I wish you wouldn't as well." Tom caressed Harry's scar. "But you don't have to tell me now. Instead, we need to discuss what happened earlier. Why didn't you just tell me you were going home in three months? That you're a ParselMouth?"

"I didn't know that I'd like you as much as I do. As for speaking ParselTongue? You can answer that one yourself. Tom, we haven't known each other very long but I do care about you." Harry sighed, burying his head into his hands. "Tom...would you trust me enough to...see if I do like men better then women?" Tom's eyes widened. "It's stupid. I'm sorry. I want to know and I do care for you...I shouldn't have-"

"Hush. You want to experiment with me?"

"No! Well, yes."

"I'm not a side-show oddity for you to have your way with." Tom smiled sadly. "I don't want you to become involved with me. I don't deserve you. I'm positive that there is another who would be more then willing to 'experiment' with you. I have to study."

"Tom, please. I...please, just kiss me like you were going to."

"Harry, you don't want that. My kisses are poison." Tom softly touched Harry's cheek. "Besides, I don't have any experience that I remember that didn't involve force. I don't want to hurt you. Merlin, you seem so sincere. I _do _want to kiss you, Harry. I want to very much. Don't do something that you'll regret."

Harry growled, shaking his head furiously. Harry needed this. He needed to know if the swarming emotions inside of him were real or a fragment of his imagination. "I won't regret this and even if you don't have experience, you just go with what you feel. If your kisses are poison then I will die tasting heaven."

Tom leaned closer to Harry. "Are you positive?"

"Yes," Harry breathed, meeting Tom's lips in the middle. The intense collision of two opposing forces, so different and yet representing many of the same qualities is oftentimes extremely powerful, resulting in a connection that neither members can avoid. For once, in their lives, they felt cared for and safe. Protected knowing that should one be harmed, the other would instantly defend them. As Tom's arms wrapped unknowingly around Harry's waist, holding him so close that there was no margin of space separating their bodies. As Harry wound his hands into the tangle of sable hair, their kiss deepened. It was two souls connecting, deciding that this was what they had yearned for, for seventeen years. It was the closest to heaven either had been and they knew they did not want it to end.

As Harry shifted positions and Tom felt Harry's obvious arousal, reality thrusted itself upon him. Tom withdrew his lips from Harry's. "I think we just made a mistake. A terrible mistake. Your body has decided what you want long before your heart and mind have. If you rushed into something with me, relationship or otherwise, you would hate yourself for the rest of your life and you would hate me as well."

Harry angrily removed himself from Tom's hold, ignoring the momentary loss of warmth. "How can you say that?! Your body wants me just as much as mine wants you," Harry gestured towards the evidence. "Or what, is the Great Tom Riddle unable to love someone that isn't pureblooded?! Or is it because you're petrified that you might be seen as human instead of the cold fucking bastard you show to the rest of the world?!"

Tom shook his head. "No. I'm not afraid of people of seeing me with you or that I'm gay. You're stubborn and reckless and I know you're not heeding my warnings about wanting to involve yourself with me. I speak the truth. Your hormones are what want me. Not _you_. No one wants me for anymore then sexual desire. You're not an exception."

"What?!" Harry screeched, staring incredulously at Tom. "You believe that bullshit?! You can trust me, Tom. I trust you. It's supposed to be mutual. You think that little of me that you can't find it in your heart to trust me?"

"Perhaps you think that _little _of _me._ I don't trust easily, you know that. I've told you a thousand times what happened in the past. I thought you might understand but I guess I was wrong. I apologize for believing that you might be able to look past my faults but you're just like the rest of them. You see a body and a face that are worth worshipping but my personality deters you from pursuing me because of who I am. The real me."

"Tom, I don't see you as just a pretty face. Yes, you are very beautiful but the person you are on the inside, I find just as beautiful. There are times when I don't know who you really are. You get this look to you and your eyes, they change from green to red and it scares me to death. At times you're so sweet and innocent that I think you have to be an angel but a second later you can be the devil incarnate." Harry watched Tom's face closely, seeing if Tom even knew he changed so drastically when Voldemort took over. There was no recognition, only confusion. "You don't even know? Tom...you have two personalities. You have yours and then another, extremely frightening and evil one."

"Then the person I saw in my mind _was _me." Tom gently placed his hand on Harry's cheek. "What I saw was a premonition and because of that, I'll disappear from your life. I'll leave. We won't have to see each other again."

"Tom, no!" Harry growled. "I'm not someone to be brushed aside on any given whim. What are you talking about? If you'd just tell me, then I could help you."

"Caelestis asked me to picture you in my mind. When I did, a figure in black robes with red eyes, almost serpentine, was approaching us. From what you just finished telling me, I _know_ that person I saw was me in the future."

Time stopped. Harry gazed at Tom in horror. Voldemort! How in the hell could Tom have seen Voldemort? Did Voldemort know what Harry was doing? Was he trying to contact his past self in order to kill Harry in 1945? Harry felt his entire world go blank and the last he heard was Tom's concerned voice saying his name as he tumbled forth into a black oblivion.

X X X

4 pages, I know. Extremely short and I apologize. I figured at the current point was perfect to end the chapter.

Thanks to: **ddz008 **Why thank you! Tom Riddle has two different personalites. That's what I'm trying to portray. **speed2, Sweet Pea Fairy, HoshiHikari4ever **Future Albus has told Past Albus about Tom Riddle becoming Lord Voldemort. Past Albus is being quite selfish by allowing Tom and Harry to pursue a relationship due to the fact that in his time line, Tom Riddle will not become the Dark Lord if Harry can change him. **LilBlackNiteCat, Yana5, flyingshadow370 **Thanks! **Dassani **Then I'm cruel because the the boys have much more hell to go through before, if, they reach heaven. **Pure Black, anna may, Hecate De Mort, Angelic Candy **Am I moving the romance along too quickly because if I am, I'd like to know! Eek! **novgue, snuffles, orangeaura868, goody2sho, foxy-kitty-katt2000, Ivin Artemis Draconis **LOL. Dumbledork!!**, Miss V, Caecuslupa, Akkiko, Mintvee **Don't worry. The lemon won't be on this site. I promise. It'll be on adultfanfiction,** Sylvia Sylverton, Sian, Dark Guardian24, Happy Slytherinson, Kiharu-sama** I love angst as well as except much, much more. **super-sailor-saturn39, S.Malfoy **Is this chapter better? At least Harry stood up to Ghislaine**, celestial light**


	8. Chapter Eight

Title: On this Cross

Warnings: Male x Male

Disclaimers: Not mine

_If I could be everything you want  
If I could change everything that I have done  
Only you know where I have gone  
I want to prove I am worthy to be called yours  
I need you more that I ever have  
And I don't want to stay, try and find me if you can  
If I get lost along the way, please don't forget me  
Know that I'll be here_

**POD- Find My Way**

Chapter Eight

"I don't care if I'm not allowed to see him. Those are your rules and I have never abided by them and I don't intend to either. You _will _permit me to see Harry or I swear, I'll make you regret your decision." Harry slowly opened his eyes, adjusting to the dim lighting in the room. He felt fatigued, almost as if he were recovering from the affects of Crucio. Groggily, Harry raised a hand to his forehead to feel his patented scar. He yelped as a searing pain lanced throughout his entire body. "Harry?" Harry ignored how dreadfully uncomfortable it was to raise himself from the bed to peer into Tom's concerned beryl eyes. The pain disappeared as those lovely emerald gems bored deeply into his soul, issuing the most intense feelings of warmth and comfort that Harry had ever felt in his entire life. "How do you feel?" Harry was too overwhelmed to speak from the emotions swirling inside of him colossally.

The Head-Nurse, Madame Tavalya, bustled towards the bed followed by Headmaster Dippet and Dumbledore. "You've been unconscious for a week, Mister Wood. We have been unable to determine the exact cause of your lapse but we have come to the conclusion that your fainting was due to that odd scar on your forehead." Tavalya reached forward to touch the legendary scar when Tom hastily grabbed her bony wrist, preventing her from going through with the action. Tavalya glared hatefully at Tom, wrenching free from his vice-like grasp. "Riddle brought you in the second you fainted. The scar was bleeding quite profusely. How did you receive that scar?"

"That's not your business," Tom automatically responded for Harry, surprised by his own need to protect the other boy. "He just woke, can't you let your questions go unanswered until he's feeling better? Honestly, you're supposed to care for the injured, not aid in their pain or has it not occurred to you that Harry's memory involving that scar causes him harm?"

"Tom is right," Dippet agreed. "Harry needs to heal. With time, you can ask your questions. I do believe that Harry is well enough to return to the Slytherin Tower, isn't he, Madame Tavalya?"

"Of course," Tavalya frowned, wanting to inquire to Harry's condition.

"Then, it's settled. I have a meeting with the Headmaster of Durmstrang, I expect that my wishes to _not _pester that young man are heeded." Headmaster Dippet patted the medi-witch's arm as he went to leave the room.

"Madame Tavalya, would you mind excusing us for a few minutes? I would like to ask Mister Wood some questions not relating to his scar but to other aspects of his well-being." The nurse grunted in acknowledgement. Albus waited until Tavalya was gone before using his wand to lock the door. Tom sat closer to Harry on the bed, feeling challenged by Dumbledore's presence. "I am not going to hurt Harry, Tom. There is no need to be concerned for his safety. He has my sincerest considerations at heart." Tom wouldn't budge, just moved nearer to Harry. Albus sighed. "It has always been your way or no way at all. I find it highly disconcerting that you keep that in mind when it comes to your lover."

The verbal arrow lodged itself accurately in Tom's heart. "Harry is _not_ my lover, Professor." Green eyes were quickly hardening, the tender fire melting only to be replaced by the coldest ice imaginable. "Is it a sin to be concerned for another's well being? Or do I not merit to feel what normal human's do?" Rivulets of crimson and obsidian began to streak the jade. "Is that what you believe, _Professor_?"

"No, I do not," Albus placidly responded, not in the least bit bothered by Tom's abhorrence towards him. "In your case, there is cause to be suspicious. You keep your distance from all who dare to enter your life. Perhaps, you are terrified that someone may permanently dwell in your heart. That in turn will lead into what you fear the most despite that you would never admit to it: the fear to be loved. You have always been afraid of love, even if it's purely platonic. It is not my business to interfere with how you live your life but when it involves another person, it becomes my business. Harry is not to be hurt. If you cannot adhere to that, then I suggest you walk away right now and never be in his life again."

Harry pursed his lips, wanting to reprimand Albus for not keeping to himself but he couldn't. He needed to know exactly where Tom's mindset lay. Tom's hand clenched the sheets tightly. "My life is not your concern, Professor. I want you to leave. I have to talk to Harry, preferably alone. I don't want you coming in between Harry and me ever again. I don't want you talking to him. There's no telling what lies you want to fill his head with but I'm not going to let you turn him against me."

"Fine. If that's what you want, Tom. Harry, I do hope you feel better."

Tom stood, crossing the room to stand by the window. "Dumbledore _is_ right, Harry. I _am_ afraid of being loved. I suppose it's because I never have been and that those who have told me they love me lie to me in order to gain my trust only to hurt me in the end. I'm also afraid _to_ love. Then you enter my life and make all that I once thought I knew completely obsolete. I never had a conscience when it came to purging the world of Muggles and Mud-bloods. They were just pawns in the game I was all to willing to play. I still want to but not alone. I'm tired of being alone, Harry. I'm going to ask you again. Would you be by my side as my equal during the war?" Tom turned to look at Harry, the afternoon sun haloing Tom. "If not, I'll leave your life. I'll forget about everything. I'll forget _you._ I know that vision I saw is a premonition. I _will_ become that man and the last thing I want to do is hurt you."

Harry sighed, tangling his hands into the sheets. What _did _he want? Harry dwelled on that question as he gazed at Tom thoughtfully. That kiss had caused Harry's emotions to become a monsoon of confusion yet he'd never been more aware of himself then in that moment when his lips touched Tom's. He _liked_ that kiss. It made him tingle in places that Cho's kiss had not even come close to delving into. An inferno that greedily spread through him to finally pool at his loins only to make him ache with the need to satiate his battling emotions. It was true that Tom made him feel secure, moreso then Sirius or Remus combined. He trusted Tom to a point; he didn't trust Tom when he became Voldemort but Tom Riddle he did. Harry wanted to prove to Tom Riddle that there were people that were not after just his body but that cared for who he was on the inside. However, those nagging voices inside of his head kept warning him that to pursue any sort of relationship with Tom was a mistake that Harry would pay the consequences for, for the rest of his life. In the end, Tom and Harry would both be hurt when Harry was forced to return to his own time and abandon Tom. Looking at Tom, it made Harry swell with warmth. To _know _that Tom Riddle only showed the caring side of his personalities to him and no one else.

Harry pondered Tom's question. _Did_ Harry want to be Tom's equal? How much of life would be different if Harry became a Dark Lord like Tom was destined to become? If all went according to plan, Tom would _not _ become Lord Voldemort in this time line and Harry would carry the secrets of Voldemort's weaknesses to the future to destroy him once and for all. Harry knew that Tom would carry through with what he'd threatened, to extricate himself from Harry's life for good. Harry wasn't going to be submissive like he'd been his entire life; towards the Dursley's, towards Albus, towards all that thought he couldn't win against Voldemort. If it meant lying to Tom about serving as his equal, Harry was determined to discover the root of Voldemort's weakness. "Yes. I will be by your side, Tom." The lie sliced Harry's heart and for a minute, he forgot to breathe from the amount of pain radiating through him; almost as if his soul were protesting.

"Harry? You mean that?" Tom asked, the smile curling his lips was so lovely that Harry was mesmerized by how much Tom's beauty could escalate by such a simple action.

"I'm tired of being alone, as well, Tom. You understand me and I don't want to lose you."

Tom's expression grew serious. "I'm not someone to be played, Harry. I'm discovering sides of myself that I had thought were completely gone. I don't know what love is Harry, but I'm willing to learn the meaning if you're willing to teach me. I have to know the truth about you Harry. I don't believe for a second that you received that scar during Quidditch or a duel. That scar was meant to kill. How did you get that scar, Harry? Who hurt you in the past?"

Harry sighed, joining Tom by the window, leaning against the frame. "I can't tell you. Just know that no matter what happens or what you start to question about me, I do care for you and that won't change. My past is as much of a secret as yours is. I know that you're mother died during birth and your cowardly father abandoned your mother before you were born. I know that you were raised in an orphanage where you were raped. I know that you spent so many odd years healing only to be hurt again by that boy Ghislaine was speaking of. Nevan." Tom flinched at the name. "I won't tell you how I got my scar but I will tell you anything else you want to know if you tell me about Nevan."

Tom wryly smiled, sinking onto the sill with his arms crossed in front of his chest. "That's fair. Nevan was fifteen, a new boy at the orphanage. I was ten at the time and had _just_ healed from what happened when I was five. Oh, I was physically abused hundreds of time after that experience but never sexually. I was the only wizard at the orphanage and I was treated as an outcast, a freak. I practiced what I knew in hiding and it seemed that the incantations came to me by nature. I never required a spell-book. Nevan was different from the rest of the children. He treated me like I was normal, that I wasn't cursed with my magical talents. He seemed to be interested in me as a _person_. That'd never happened before. Nevan was a site to behold; tall, well-muscled, long black hair, and the most tantalizing blue eyes. My body reacted around him, even though I had no idea why I was feeling that way. For six months, he earned my trust. I followed his every word. I don't know if I loved him or not but I felt something for him and it made me feel so warm inside that I was addicted to those feelings he had unearthed inside of me.

"One night, it had been snowing very hard and the orphanage was ancient so the drafts made the place abysmally frigid. I crawled into bed with Nevan seeking comfort and warmth. He didn't speak and he wouldn't hold me. I was confused. Why was he acting like that? Why was he staring at me? I didn't have time to scream. His kisses were bruising, all about power and punishment. My lips were bleeding by the time he'd finished. His hands were everywhere, my clothes were torn from my body." Harry's brows furrowed and he wanted so much to comfort Tom but he knew that Tom wouldn't welcome it. Instead, Harry watched as Tom's face became lost in the memories. "You know the sickening part? He told me he loved me as he touched me, as he raped me. It hurt more than you can imagine. At least the men from before had prepared me. Nevan didn't bother. I fainted after he'd finished. The duvet was stained with blood and semen and Nevan was gone. I never thought I'd have to face that but with what Ghislaine had said and then Cael earlier... For seven years, I made myself become a shell without emotions. I suppose I could blame you for making me like this." Tom indicated the few tears on his cheeks with a nonchalant wave of his hand.

Harry sat beside of Tom, awkwardly taking hold of his hand. "I shouldn't have pried but I'm glad that I did. I won't do that to you. I won't hurt you if I can't help it. What Nevan did, only bastards do that. Not everyone is like that. I'm not. I promise." Harry felt bashful underneath the scrutiny of Tom's emerald gaze. "I don't know what it is about you. I'd thought I was straight until I met you. I thought I knew where my priorities lay but now I'm not so sure. I don't want to leave you when I have to go home in December. I'd like to take you but that's most assuredly out of the question. I'd stay with you but that's even more absurd. Even though I'm going home in three months, I don't want you to close yourself off from me. These three months can be perfect if you want them to be. We can learn to trust and love again and when time passes, we'll forget about one another and move onto someone else that will make us even happier."

Tom chuckled softly, squeezing Harry's hand tighter. "If that were true, then why are you crying?" The Heir of Slytherin gently reached forward with his free hand, wiping the tears aside. "I don't understand why you must leave in December. What's waiting for you at home? A lover?" Tom teased, ruffling Harry's hair. "You can make your final decision with December comes. Until then, you're mine."

"Oh, I'm yours, am I?" Harry laughed, capturing the fingers trailing his face into a kiss. "And what rights do you have to that claim?"

"Every right. I want to take you somewhere."

Harry raised a brow at Tom's abruptness. "Take me where?"

"You'll see." Tom's eyes twinkled mischievously. "It's Hogsmeade weekend. All of the students are gone except the first and second years. We can escape for a little while. Come on. We can ride on my Nimbus 200." There was so much eagerness on Tom's face that Harry could only nod, quelling the tremendous amounts of little trolls in his stomach turning hundreds of cartwheels as Tom led him from the Infirmary and towards the main doors.

The cool, night air greeted the pair. Students were flocking to and from Hogwart's, none paying any attention to the two. Tom called his broom, the Nimbus happily pausing in the currents for the two boys to settle on comfortably. Tom whispered something unintelligible to his broom and the direction was changed. Harry was awestruck by the scenery as they quickly left the castle. It was exquisite from his perch on the broom, arms wrapped securely around Tom's waist. He sighed, resting against Tom's back. He'd never been this relaxed and blissful in his life. Thousands of lights littered the patchwork ground below, the clouds slowly journeyed past the young men, the stars glittered in the heavens above like millions of shining diamonds etched into the abyss of night.

"Almost there," Tom's voice interrupted Harry's reverie.

The broom came to a stop. Harry watched Tom, not even seeing his surroundings. The pure beauty that Tom radiated was enough for Harry's world to come to a halt. "I've never shown another this place. I go here when I need to be alone and think. I'm sharing this knowledge with you because I want us to have a special place to share. I know, it makes me sound ridiculous but I'm starting to realize that I can't predict what you make you me do or what you make me feel. Even when you return home, you can come here and you'll know that I was here."

Harry's breath was caught in his throat. Not because of the sheer loveliness of Tom's spot but because it was _his_ spot. It was the same exact place that Harry ventured to when he needed to escape the crowds and to think. He'd came here once in first year, only to keep returning until it became habitual. It was odd that this was also the place Tom used for the exact same reasons that Harry did. It was enough to make Harry wonder if perhaps their Fates _were_ written eons ago. "Tom, it's beautiful. Thank you for sharing this with me. I'll always remember this place for the rest of my life. It sounds like we're hopeless romantics but I know that no matter how much time passes, this place will be ours."

Tom smiled, uncharacteristically flopping onto the grass, patting the space beside of him for Harry. "You said that I could ask anything I wanted to ask if I told you about Nevan. I think it's time that you upheld your end of the bargain. You and that girl, were you intimate?"

Harry had been expecting another less lenient inquiry. Tom's eyes were twin glowing, jade orbs, full of an emotion Harry could not place. "No. We kissed, that was it. I'm a virgin, if that's what you honestly want to know. You don't have to hide what you want to ask behind useless questions, Tom. I'm not ashamed of my virginity. All of my friends have lost theirs, including the girls. I get teased a lot because of the fact but I want my first time to be special. Not a bunch of hormones telling me what to do."

"With your looks I had thought you might have plenty of lovers." Tom grinned cheekily, lying on his back with his arms tucked behind his head. "I noticed your appearance the second I met you in the hall. It's hard not to. You're exceptionally beautiful."

"You're one to talk, Tom. Most of Hogwart's wants you. That little show you put on in the locker room, was that on purpose?"

"Yes," Tom simply stated, winking at the scowling Harry. "I must say, the reaction I received from you was wonderful. Of course, I hadn't expected Romulus and the rest to react in the same context. Am I honestly that attractive?"

Harry scoffed, flinging a piece of grass at Tom. "As if you didn't know. Yes, you are. There, is your head inflating with the compliments that you're too sexy for your shirt?"

Tom laughed cheerfully. "Too sexy for my shirt? Where in the hell did you hear that?"

"Oh, it's a song." Harry smiled, scooting closer to Tom, meeting the indiscernible green eyes. "Let's not forget that you're a genius. Your attitude could use an adjustment but I suppose that I can overlook that annoying aspect. What else do you want to ask? I can see you want to."

"Does being gay bother you?"

"Ah, that's the question I was waiting for." Harry smirked, drawing his legs to his chest and resting his head on his knees, gazing at Tom side-long. "No. I mean, kind of. No one I know is gay. I know several bisexuals but no one that's purely gay. The three bisexuals I know have been in relationships since they were younger. After the entire mistake with when I was fifteen, I began to really _look_ at women. They're all the same except for my best friend and one of my godfather's cousins. My friends always griped about their girlfriends and I did _not_ want to be in one of those relationships. I thought that I just needed to wait for that special one to come along that didn't adhere to society's standards. Someone unique. Silly me not to consider another boy because another boy's the one that's special."

"How disgustingly endearing," Tom drawled, earning an adorable pout from Harry.

Silence passed between them for several minutes. Nothing but the wind could be heard. Harry glanced at Tom, seeing the other boy's eyes were closed. Harry felt the incessant urge to touch Tom. Listening only to his heart, Harry laid down beside of Tom, resting himself on Tom's chest. Immediately, Tom's eyes snapped open. "Is this okay?" Harry whispered, almost fearful of being rejected.

"Yes." Tom's eyes slid shut as his arms wrapped around Harry. Harry listened to Tom's heart beating peacefully his chest, a lullaby that quickly had Harry's own eyes closing. Within a matter of minutes, both boys were asleep and more happier then they'd ever been in their lives.

X X X

This chapter was _much_ too happy. I need lots of angst next chapter. Yes. Lots of it.

Thank you to the reviewers. Please review again. Feed the author.


	9. Chapter Nine

Title: On this Cross

Disclaimers: Not mine

_Sanity now and beyond me, I will always love you,  
However long I stay, I will always love you,  
Whatever words I say, I will always love you  
There's no choice  
  
Whenever I'm alone with you  
You make me feel like I'm whole again  
  
Voices in the darkness  
Scream away my mental health  
Can I ask a question  
To help me save me from myself_

**A Perfect Circle, Diary of a Madman**

Chapter Nine

"First day of Hogwart's classes, scared?" Tom inquired, seated opposite of Harry in the conversational area of Tom's Head Boy quarters. The fire eagerly leapt at the tinder that Tom slid into the blazing inferno. Harry smirked at how odd it was that such an intelligent and gifted wizard like Tom still chose the more menial task to feed the flames. Tom enjoyed the simple aspects of life and it was becoming increasingly apparent as the days passed. Perhaps it was Tom's inner, hidden traits that perpetrated the boundaries of Tom's opposing personalities; the part of Tom that he'd never been. A child. A child whose light had been greedily extinguished, a bright ray of love that had never been given the chance to show that love to the rest of the world. Perhaps, it could happen now. Perhaps, with him. "Harry?"

Harry grinned, shaking his head. "Headmaster Dippet finalized my schedule with Professor Dumbledore. _All_ of my classes are either with you or Romulus so I have nothing to worry about. You'll protect me, won't you?" It had become a natural habit to flirt with Tom. The words just came to Harry with no uncomfortable amount of thought. It was normal to Harry, just as ordinary as teasing a girl. It made Harry grin and blush at Tom's own shy, tentative smiles and lightly cherry-stained cheeks. "Or, would you leave me to fend myself from those corrupting succubus's?"

"You know I'd make you fight for yourself but if the situation were serious and you were in danger, I would give my life to protect yours from harm." Harry's grin vanished at the sincerity in Tom's voice. The intense gaze Tom was giving Harry had him nearly shivering. "I would, Harry. I don't mean to insult your abilities but should the time come when you need my protection, I _will_ be there to keep you safe. No one touches what is mine."

Harry frowned, not appreciating the hard edge to Tom's eyes, the possessiveness. "I'm not something you own, Tom. I never will be either. I'm my own person you have no claim to keeping me to yourself or to tell me who I can see or what I can do. I-" Harry paused as Tom crossed the space, resting his head on Harry's knees. "Tom." Harry sighed, fingers curling into the dark locks. "I don't know what to do. Sometimes, you're so nice to me and other times you regard me like I'm your property. What _am_ I to you, Tom?"

Tom closed his eyes. "I don't know. I don't know when I do those things to you. I apologize if I frighten you. I'm not exactly positive how relationships are supposed to work seeing as how I've never been in a mutual relationship. All I've ever known has revolved around abuse and rape. If I'm a bit selfish with you, it's because of my past. I don't want to be without you."

Harry caressed the silken strands of sable, staring at Tom's visage. Those jade eyes, so much like his own, shuddered open, meeting Harry's conspicuous gape. "You won't be without me for the time being, Tom but I am going home in December. I wish that I could tell you that I'll stay with you forever but I can't. I want you to decide if you want us to progress....this...whatever this is or if you want to just be friends. It's your decision."

Tom slowly rose from his position, face inches from Harry's. "I've never had someone like me for who I am, Harry. I'm not about to end this before it has a chance to become what we both want it to be." Tom cupped Harry's face in his hands. "I'm not a romantic person so any ideals you have regarding the kind of idiotic relationship that normal people have, just forget them. I will never be like that." Harry's heart leapt to his throat as that agonizingly beautiful face approached his own, their lips just centimeters from touching. "But I promise that I will take care of you to the best of my abilities."

Harry felt his cheeks flush. His arms wound around Tom's back. "Why couldn't we have met earlier?" _But you're not even supposed to know him. You weren't supposed to be involved in his life, _Harry's inner, snide voice that sounded suspiciously like Professor Snape reminded Harry harshly. Harry ignored the voice. He knew that he was playing with fire and he also knew he was going to get burnt when it all came to pass. "You don't need to pretend to be someone that you're not when you're around me. Are you forgetting? We're two sides of the same coin."

"Yes. It's difficult to not forget that." Harry was taken aback by the nervous glimmer in the emerald shards reflecting, shockingly, Harry's own anxiety. "This entire concept is new to me but I do know that we cannot let the others see what is developing, especially not Dumbledore. It makes me sound extremely terrible for wanting to hide _us._" Tom's smile was radiant, infecting Harry with more emotions then he thought possible. "I'm not ashamed of you but this is foreign to us both. I want to keep it as our little secret."

"I completely agree." _You're making a mistake. You're leading Tom Riddle on. This isn't an idiot like Cho. This is the future Dark Lord. You had better watch what you do or you might cause Riddle to become Lord Voldemort regardless. _Harry shoved Snape's voice into the farthest recesses of his mind. "Tom, why _do_ you like me? You can have your pick from the best and yet you choose me."

Tom's fingers languidly touched the contours of Harry's face. "I don't need to explain my reasons. If you haven't found the truth on your own then you'll never find it. We haven't known one another for long, I know, so it's odd that I attached myself to you. The second I saw you, I felt that I could trust you, that you were the one that could heal me. Now that we've gotten to know each other, I believe my that initial instincts regarding you were honest. I _want_ you to heal me, Harry. I feel like a moron for telling you that." Tom's crooked smile had Harry's own grin surfacing. "If I hadn't met you, I was more then prepared to vanish after I graduated, to spend years perfecting my knowledge of the Dark Arts in order to become a Dark Lord. Now? I don't know. I want to spend time with you and since you've agreed to be by my side, we can learn the Dark Arts together, take over this world as one unit. However, with you leaving in December, I had thought that I could go with you."

"What?" Harry swallowed the lump in his throat. _What are you going to say to that?_ The voice inquired acidly. What _was_Harry's response to Tom's oblivious question? He couldn't possibly tell Tom the truth. He had no intentions of telling Tom at all. "That might not be a good idea. Once I get home, I'm going to study Potions in Japan. I doubt you'd want to travel the world with me when you have your own ideas and dreams."

Tom nodded mutely, lips pursing. His withdrew himself from Harry. Harry could only stare at the young man with tears welling in his eyes. "Romulus is expecting you in the Common Room. You can't be late. Your first class is Transfiguration and Professor Ledoux despises Slytherin. I'll see you in Potions." Without another word, Tom grabbed his Arithmacy books and stalked through the door.

_Went and hurt him already. You fool, fool boy._

"Shut the fuck up," Harry growled at Snape's voice. In bad humor, he took his Transfiguration text and hurried down the stairs to the Common Room. Most of the Slytherin's were already gone save for Romulus. The other boy arched a brow at Harry's expression. "It's nothing," Harry pasted his fake smile on his face. "Where's Septimus?"

Romulus rolled his eyes, the two leaving the Slytherin Tower. "I was molesting him and he decided that I'd went too far. Honestly, does he think I can just _stop_ having sex in order to appease his virginity. He's never had a relationship before but I'd thought, you know, he might be fair game with me. Apparently not considering he threw a pretty hefty hex at me for touching him below the waist." Grinning manically, Romulus sent a sly wink at the blushing Harry. "I'm lucky I get to kiss him but without tongue. It's frustrating as hell on my libido."

Harry laughed, forgetting his own personal troubles for the moment, feeling at ease with the youth who reminded him so much of his godfather. "Give him time, Romulus. You said he's never been with another person so it's obvious you were his first kiss. He's not ready to pursue something more intimate. If you do push it, he might think you're only with him for sex which...you're not, are you?"

"No!" Romulus snapped. Seeing Harry's frown, Romulus said, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have yelled. I finally have my chance to be with the one person I've loved and now I can't even touch him without him yelling rape? I've spent seven years craving his touch and he hardly has the nerve to bring his arms around me when we hug. What's worse is that my parents want me to settle down and get married, produce some little brats. The terrible part; they want me to marry Sahila Snape."

"His sister?!" Harry's eyes widened.

"Not so loud," Romulus pleaded, glancing around the corridor for prying ears. "I love Septimus more than I thought possible but I don't want to disappoint my parents either. If I told Sep that my parents want me to be with Sahila, he'd never speak to me again. He'd hate me for the rest of my life! I couldn't deal with that. I don't know what to do, Harry. I'm confused and depressed. What should I do? Do I tell Septimus or just hope this all goes away?"

"It isn't my place to tell you what to do. It's your own." Harry smiled encouragingly at Romulus. He knew he couldn't say a damn word to Romulus for fear of neither Sirius or Severus being born in this dimension. "Right, who's Transfiguration with?" The melancholic visage disappeared from the naturally cheerful face as a grin brightened Romulus's face. Harry inattentively listened to Romulus prattle about the most obscure topics. He missed Sirius. Missed him so much it hurt. Was it wrong to entertain thoughts of Romulus as Sirius to fill the aching void in his heart where his godfather had been?

...xxx...

"Bloody hell! You're talented, Harry!" Lykaois Nott screeched, brown braid flippantly slithering behind her very much like a snake. "I've never seen someone so good at Transfiguration! With you by our side, we'll claim the House Cup and the Quidditch Cup again." Lykaois threw a fist triumphantly into the air before blowing a raspberry at the scowling Gryffindor students. Harry laughed at the giddy mood Lykaois seemed to be stuck in. "You're amazing!"

Harry blushed modestly. "I wouldn't say _that_ but thank you. I haven't been able to talk to you since that mishap with you friend-"

"Ghislaine is _not_ my friend," Lykaois spat, mocha hued eyes narrowing. "I can't stand that whore and I wish she'd die. She's sly, manipulative, cunning, and beautiful. It's a small wonder that Aleron pants after her like a dog in heat. Honestly, after the thing she's pulled in order to be popular, sleeping with all that idiots who will have her, it's a surprise that Aleron hasn't smelled the coffee. Oh, Professor, is there something you want?" Lykaois innocently looked up at Professor Ledoux.

"Yes, as a matter of fact, there is. You could keep your mouth closed while I'm teaching my class. Twenty points from Slytherin and detention with me tonight at eight. You had better be careful or Mister Wood's had work will be moot." Lykaois grinned cheekily, winking happily at Harry as she turned around in her seat to continue with her own assignment.

Harry thought of Severus. The Potions Master was teaching Double Potions at the same time as Harry was in Transfiguration. Only ten brave students had decided to take the class and Harry had been one of them. He and Severus had forged a sort of odd friendship that they had both desperately needed at the time. Sirius had been murdered and Harry was trying to cope with the loss when Severus had begrudgingly offered to listen to Harry's laments. Inadvertently, that had formed into a bond that was familial. With Sirius gone, Harry needed the paternal guidance and wisdom that Severus could offer. Harry smiled, playing with the edge of his feather. Merlin, he missed Severus. He could have used his input regarding Tom. Harry didn't notice as his eyes slowly closed and he drifted to sleep...

"_Harry Potter," the hissing voice that haunted Harry's mind came to Harry's dreamscape. "Harry Potter," Voldemort repeated. "The bane of my entire existence. I cannot find you. I've been looking for you and yet somehow you manage to escape me. I _know _you're not that talented in the Dark Arts to render your aura signature obsolete. Where _are_ you, Harry? Where are you hiding from me? I'll find you, boy."_

_Harry shook his head, hand going to his wand. "No, you won't. You can't hurt me. I'm not afraid of you anymore, Voldemort. I've spent half of my life fighting you and I can finally say that you don't scare me any longer. I'm going to kill you soon."_

_Voldemort laughed. "Is that a fact, boy? You stupid, stupid child. I'm much more powerful then you can imagine. You don't have the protection of your parents and those who do love you, are dead. That traitorous Black." Harry ground his teeth at the mention of his godfather. "Diggory, the first boy you unconsciously desired." Harry's brows furrowed. How in the hell did Voldemort know that intimate detail of his life? "And yes, the others will be dead shortly. My attack upon Hogwart's is going to be devastatingly. Will you even be there to save them?"_

"_You're lying!"_

"_Am I?" Voldemort hissed, wand pulled from his robe. "I'd think that my threats wouldn't be considered idle. Shall I conjure the truth for you?"_

_Harry shook his head, vehemently refusing to believe a word that Voldemort spoke. "It doesn't matter even if you do! I know it's not true!"_

"_Suit yourself," Voldemort waved his wand and suddenly, Harry saw carnage. Hogwart's was blazing on fire, students were running from the castle in fear while several thousand Death Eater's wreaked havoc and death upon the unfortunate children. Ron Weasley lay next to Hermione, both bearing evidence of Crucio. Remus Lupin was a raging werewolf, being cursed with Avada Kedavra tenfold. Severus Snape was being tormented by Lucius Malfoy. "I think you see the truth," Voldemort laughed, causing the imagery to vanish. "Still won't reveal yourself, will you? Fine. Crucio!" Voldemort hissed, the curse flying towards Harry in record time._

_Suddenly, Harry was knocked to the ground, the full brunt of the spell being deflected. Harry glanced around, finding the look of shock on Voldemort's face that must have mirrored his own. There was not another person that could have saved Harry. It was only Voldemort and Harry. Voldemort glared at Harry. "Your parents are dead and no one else has bonded you so why, why did that happen? The wizard who has claimed you must be very powerful to prevent your death even in your dreamscape. I will find the truth of who has marked you..."_

A hand was on his shoulder as Harry's eyes snapped open. It was Tom. "Tom? What are you doing here? You don't have Transfiguration with me." Harry frowned, confused. "Romulus? I don't understand. What's going on?"

"You fell asleep in Transfiguration. Romulus tried to wake you but you wouldn't respond. Professor Ledoux brought you to the Infirmary." Tom hesitantly leaned forward, wrapping his arms around Harry, ignoring Romulus's bewildered gasp. "I was worried about you, Harry. I thought you'd went into a coma like you did before. Don't scare me like that again, okay?" Harry nodded, burrowing against Tom's shoulder. "You were trembling and your scar was bleeding. It looked like you were under _Crucio._"

"I was," Harry murmured against Tom's robe. "I've been under it several times. It's not very pleasant. Vo-the person in my dream, he cast _Crucio_ but just as it came into contact with me, I was shoved to the ground. Tom, did you do that?"

"I...I don't know. All I did was kiss you."

Harry frowned, looking up at Tom. "You kissed me while I was asleep? You don't kiss me when I'm awake. That hurts, Tom." Sheepishly smiling, Harry nuzzled Tom's throat. "Thank you. It makes me happy that you have that affect on me. Did you like it?" Harry grinned like the cat who just caught the canary. "Was it nice to kiss unresponsive lips?"

Romulus cleared his throat. "I think I'm going to go. I'm already late for Potions. Harry, feel better, eh?"

"I don't think I need to warn you to not to tell anyone about what you've seen," Tom threatened.

"Of course not."

Harry smiled charmingly at Romulus as he exited the room. "For your information, no, it was not nice to kiss you when you were sleep." Tom's cheeks were faintly pink. "It's much easier. After that first kiss, I've been a bit reluctant to kiss you again. A bit is a understatement. I'm terrified of kissing you again. You should feel proud that you're the only living being that can frighten me." Tom laughed at himself. "I didn't think you wanted to either. You never made any moves."

"You _want_ me to make the moves? I'm just as inexperienced." Harry chuckled, lips finding Tom's. The kiss was sweet and clumsy, all about innocence and testing new waters. Their first kiss had been about passion and need but this one was the complete opposite. Harry's tongue nervously flicked against Tom's lower lip, entreating entrance. Tom's lips opened, allowing the appendage to slip inside easily. Harry did as his heart told him to, making up for his lack of experience. Coaxingly, Harry's tongue beckoned Tom's to join. Slowly, unsure, Tom's caressed Harry's in the most pleasurable dance that either boy had received in their lives. It was something neither wanted to end but knew it had to before the kiss progressed into an act they were nowhere near ready to explore.

"That was certainly different," Tom panted, regaining his breath. "Where did you learn to do that?"

Harry blushed a dark crimson. "I saw two friends do it. I...I'm sorry if you didn't like it."

"I did like it." Tom smiled. "A lot. I sound very articulate." Laughing, Tom held Harry close to him. "You've made me feel alive and I must thank you for that. I _am_ sorry that I got angry with you earlier. I know you had a life before you came here and met me. I need to respect that. Just don't be too surprised when I convince you to remain here with me or for you to let me accompany you home." Harry pursed his lips, nodding. "We've already missed our second class. Might as well spend the time...cuddling." Tom's lovely face blanched at the term.

Harry laughed, snuggling against Tom's strong chest. Yes, cuddling was what Harry wanted. He wanted to forget his troubles and just let life stop in its tracks. Nothing mattered as Tom held him. All he knew was that he loved the warmth inside of him and the feel of that lean, muscled body pressed against his own, providing a net of safety that Harry selfishly held onto.

...xxx...

People still like this. I'm in so much shock. Hopefully this story isn't moving too rapidly. I'm estimating ten or fifteen more chapters. Perhaps more depending on what all I want to happen. Also, I'd like your opinions on what should happen with Tom and Harry. Does Tom go to Harry's time, does Harry stay in Tom's time, Does Tom and Harry go to the present only to both be Dark Lord's, Does Tom go to kill Voldemort....or any other ideas you have. There are many possible turns that this story could take. I'm debating on which one.

Once again, thank you to my reviewers. It makes me so happy!


	10. Chapter Ten

Title: On this Cross

Warnings: Male x Male

Disclaimers: Not mine

_You face me in silence and hope is in your eyes  
Unspoken yet pleading you wait for my reply  
Alone now I tremble in want of your embrace  
Let not tears fall for me, let me show the way_

_**All that Remains- Behind Silence and Solitude**_

Chapter Ten

"What do you say, Harry?" Romulus inquired, draping his arm over Harry's shoulders, ignoring the warning growl that was inaudible to most of the students gathered around the Slytherin table. The black haired boy merely smiled incorrigibly at Tom. "I promise you'll have fun with us and we won't hurt you much." Romulus frowned at Harry's pursed lips. "Look, it's just a swim in the lake among a couple of friends. It'll just be me, you, and Septimus. You don't have to be scared of us, you know. We can be pretty nice when we want to. We just don't like non-Slytherins and since you're one of us, we _love_ you." Romulus glanced at the scowling Tom. "You can come too, Tom, to make sure we don't harm a hair on Harry's precious head."

Tom snorted, rolling his eyes. "I doubt you'd try to in the first place. I have nothing to worry about. By all means, take Harry with you on your idiotic escapade to break the school's rules. I _am _Head Boy. I could give you detentions for being rebellious." Tom smoothed the folds in his robes just below the glistening Head Boy badge. "It's high time I retire to my own rooms. This being in public with the rest of these fools is irritating."

Harry sighed, flinging Romulus's arm from his shoulders. "Why don't you stay with us Tom? I don't want to eat alone. I'm having fun with Romulus." Lips forming a perfect pout, Harry blinked pitifully up at Tom. The other boy's eye twitched. "Please?" Tom nodded curtly, sidling a bit closer to Harry then would have been considered appropriate between friends. If only Harry moved another inch, their bodies would be touching. Realizing it, Harry felt his cheeks seep with warmth. He adverted his attentions from Tom, focusing on the plate of food in front of him.

"Anyway, Seppy and I were thinking of heading down to the lake about eleven. That way, most of the students will be asleep and the teachers will be busy doing whatever it is teachers do. It should be loads of fun. Usually it's just me and Aleron but Aleron is occupied with Ghislaine." Romulus gestured towards the two blondes necking at the end of the table. "Honestly, can't they keep their public displays of affection in private? It's revolting enough to imagine Ghislaine but paired with Aleron?" Romulus shuddered. "Not that Aleron's bad-looking because he's not. He's sexy as hell." Septimus's grunt had Romulus hastily commenting, "Nowhere near as delectable as you are, muffin."

"Muffin?" One of Septimus's brows darted to his forehead. Harry smothered his giggles behind his napkin. "Why in the hell did you call me muffin? Couldn't you use a word that's less girly? I am _not_ the girl in this relationship, thank you very much."

Romulus's humor switched from teasing to snide in five seconds. "Oh, is that so? You sure as hell act like a girl. You're acting like a prude. You won't even let me touch you , for fuck's sake." Harry fiddled with the napkin in his lap, hating to hear the two argue. "You said you love me and yet you don't even let me _show_ you love. I could make you feel so good, Septimus. I've been saving _that_ part of my virginity for you, I'll have you know."

"You're a liar," Septimus snarled, glaring at his significant other.

"_What?_" Romulus seethed.

"The rumors about you and Potter-"

Harry's eyes snapped from his shredded napkin to gaze gob-smacked at Romulus and Septimus. The Slytherins near the quartet immediately went silent at the mention of Potter. Was Octavious hated _that_ much by the Slytherins? Harry felt the temperature immediately descend twenty degrees at the pure frozen ice in Romulus's eyes. "Those rumors were spread by Potter. I wouldn't touch that bastard with a fucking pole. Merlin, Septimus, you believe that? Why?!"

"Why not? Look at him!" Septimus waved a hand towards Octavious. "The entire school lusts after him and the nightly sessions you have are legendary. What's to say that you _haven't_ had sex with him? It doesn't help that you fawn all over _him_," Septimus pointed accusingly at a bewildered Harry. "Just because he looks like Potter, you can't stop touching him. What? Boned him yet?"

Tom's glare could have curdled blood. "You _will_ leave Harry out of your quarrels."

Harry felt like giggling, that Tom was taking up for him but also, he felt like he should be concerned for the covetous control that Tom continued to exhibit. Romulus's ire deserted him. "I don't want Harry, Septimus. I'm his friend. I'm sorry that I got mad at you. It frustrates me that I can't be with you in the most intimate way possible. I love you. I'm sorry that you don't feel the same." Before either Harry or Septimus could stop him, Romulus was stalking towards the doors.

Septimus sighed wearily, rubbing his temples. "What have I gotten myself into?" he rhetorically asked no one in particular. "I should go after him. Harry, I apologize for my behavior. This entire concept is new to me. I should explain my hasty accusation. You come along and manage to steal Tom's attention, a feat that hasn't been accomplished in seven years." Harry glanced at Tom's expression, not surprised to see his face vacant of emotion. "I'm jealous to put it simply. Not only that but Romulus seems to hold you in high esteem. I think my reasons for being envious are justified. Now that that's clear, I'm going to throttle Romulus for his public tantrum."

Harry scattered the remains of his napkin on his plate. "Well, that's certainly interesting. I don't think anyone's ever been jealous of me over something so trivial." He grinned, winking at Tom. "And to think, all I had to do was capture your attention."

"You had better watch yourself," Tom teased. "Are you finished?" Harry nodded, scowling at the food with napkin pieces littered on it. "Would you like to take a walk with me?"

"Are you asking me out on a date?"

Tom rolled his eyes, standing. "Take it how you wish. I usually take a walk after my meals. It would be a nice change to have company that doesn't irk me." Neither boy heeded the stares accompanying their exit from the Great Hall. "I always feel claustrophobic surrounded by those idiots. I haven't inquired about your first day of classes. How were they? Did anyone cause you any trouble? Were the professors fair?"

Harry laughed, feeling more light-hearted and carefree now then he ever had in his entire life. There was something about Tom that eased his soul and made him comfortable. "It was fine. I was a little disappointed that the only class I had with you was the one class that we missed. Romulus was over-protective of me. I think he's terrified of me being harmed because he's concerned your wrath will be directed at him. I'm not a child, I'm old enough to take care of myself." Sobering, Harry reached forward and caught hold of Tom's elbow. Tom quizzically raised a brow. "I don't think you truly know how much it means to me that you're letting me know the real you. I came here thinking that I could just keep to myself, not make any friends, and when December the 20th comes, I could return to my old life without any emotional attachments." Harry smiled warmly. "Septimus warned me about you. He told me that you kept to yourself and your privacy was very important. After that, I _knew_ that I didn't have a chance to befriend you. You've let me past your guards and I'm doing the same for you."

Tom wrenched free from Harry's hold on his elbow. "It would seem everyone warned you about me and with good reason. I can't explain this to you, Harry. I can't even explain it to myself. I have more doubts then you can imagine. You've forced yourself into my life and I don't think I _want_ to remove you from it. Once the ineptness of this ends, we can talk about our reasons. Hopefully by then, we'll have figured the truth out. Anyway, there's no point dwelling on it. In addition to the spot we've termed ours, there are a few others that I've claimed for myself that I wouldn't mind sharing with you."

"I'd like that very much," Harry responded shyly, blushing. To cause Harry's cheeks to darken even further, Tom hesitantly slipped his hand into Harry's. Harry gaped, hand going limp in Tom's grasp. Tom flushed at Harry's reaction. Just as Tom started to remove his hand from Harry's, Harry quickly intertwined their fingers together, tightening the hold. _Holding Tom Riddle's hand, aren't you feeling cocky?_ Harry mentally smirked at his inner voice. Yes, he felt very smug. Smug and blissful; two emotions that he rarely felt in his own time. It was vexing that the reasons for Harry's elation was Tom Riddle. _You're attracted to Lord Voldemort..._

For once, Harry had to agree with his inner musings.

..xxx...

The sun was setting below the horizon, the heavens streaked with shades of gold, rose, and tangerine. The trees were becoming thicker, their shadows dancing on the grass. Harry felt himself shiver as Hogwart's began to disappear. Tom squeezed his hand. "You don't have to be afraid, unless you don't trust me." Harry shook his head. He trusted Tom, just not his Voldemort personality. "Then you have nothing to worry about. This place I'm taking you, it's not on the school's boundaries. I've taken the liberty of casting an aura-hiding spell on us so that the wards will not detect us leaving. Do you know how to Apparate, Harry?"

"Yes..." Harry said slowly. "Why? Where's this place at?"

"Oh, no, we don't have to Apparate to get there. I was only wondering. Wizards can't receive their Apparating License until they're 20. I find it curious that you already know how to." Tom shrugged. Harry winced. He needed to watch what he said around Tom. "You must be extraordinarily talented to be able to Apparate at 17. It's refreshing to find another person that doesn't follow the rules and learns on his own. I've been waiting a long time to meet someone like you. You'd make a worthy adversary but I would much rather have you as my ally. My only ally." Tom's lips curled into a devilishly handsome grin. "I could call you _my_ Harry but I'd rather not have my head chewed off again."

"You _can_ call me _your_ Harry but I get to call you _my _Tom. It's only fair." Harry giggled. Pause. Rewind. Harry just _giggled_? Since when did he do such a horrible action? Girls were the ones that giggled. Deciding that it was best to _not_ go into thoughts of which one of them were the girl in their strange relationship, Harry continued, "Do we have a deal?"

"No." Tom chuckled. "Ah! Finally. I didn't think it took so long to get here. Usually I fly but I wanted to walk with you." Tom pushed aside the branches of two evergreen trees. "This is my second sanctuary. I discovered it back in first year. It's been quite some while since I was last here." The glade was beautiful. The aroma of meadow flowers greeted their scents gaily. Past the flowers, a grave of boulders spread for meters to come to an abrupt end at the edge of a cliff overlooking a hefty part of England. "Do you like it, Harry?"

Harry nodded, unable to speak the words to describe what he was experiencing. Tears unbiddingly to his eyes. Tom was sharing these special sanctuaries to him almost as if they were small gifts. It was enough to cause Harry's heart to beat erratically. "Oh Tom," Harry whispered at long last. How on Earth was he going to be able to abandon Tom in December? All of the happiness he'd ever felt revolved around the other boy. Sirius couldn't even bring the amounts of joy to his heart like Tom was doing. Tom Marvolo Riddle who was Lord Voldemort. It seemed impossible and if Harry wasn't actually_ feeling_ the emotions, he would have believed that he was in the most pleasant dream imaginable. He _wanted_ to remain with Tom, to forget all about his time and savor the ecstasy. Harry knew he had to return with the secrets of Voldemort's weakness so that his friends could live in peace for the rest of their lives. What about _his_ life? What about_ his_ peace and happiness? He couldn't just marry a woman to forever dream about Tom Riddle. All of the signs were pointing that the key to his delight was Tom. There was no denying it as Harry gazed at Tom with new eyes.

Tom's crooked smile. The way his usual perfectly combed black hair was wafting in the breeze, showing the high, chiseled cheekbones. Tom's beautiful green eyes that even with the garnet and sable didn't lose their radiance. Tom's dimples when he grinned at him-a grin that was reserved specifically _for_ Harry. Tom's voice, so dulcet and tender that Harry had trouble placing that angel's voice with the Dark Lord's. Harry couldn't stop himself even if he'd wanted to as he launched himself at Tom, wrapping his arms around Tom's waist and sending both of them crashing to the fragrant flowers. It felt so_ right_ to be that close to Tom. Felt absolutely _wonderful_ to feel Tom's own arms encircling his own waist, molding their bodies perfectly together, as if they were made to _fit_ each other.

"Harry?" Tom asked softly. "Are you alright?"

"More than I've ever been," Harry said hoarsely. "Tom? Does it bother you? Touching me and kissing me?" Merlin, he _had_ to know. "I want the truth." Even if it killed him, he needed to know if Tom was experiencing what he was.

One of Tom's arm unwound itself from Harry's waist. He uncertainly raised his hand to touch Harry's chest, the muscle fluttering at the gentle contact. "No. I'm not bothered. Afraid? Maybe. I don't want to disappoint you, Harry. I can't commit to you like a normal person because I'm _not_ normal. I...I have feelings for you though I don't exactly know what they are yet. I don't think it's love, not that I would know the difference. I feel like nothing else means anything when I'm with you. If that makes sense to you then you must be going through the same."

"I am." Harry patiently smiled, shifting their positions so that the two young men were both laying on their sides, facing one another. "I just want you to hold me. It's been a while since I've been held. I've never been held in the romantic sense, only a couple of times by my best friend's mother and my godfather." Harry's smile grew larger as Tom moved Harry closer to him, the bespectacled youth burrowing against Tom's chest, nose nudging Tom's throat. "Thank you."

"You're thanking me?" Tom laughed quietly, not in the least bit embarrassed by how incredibly intimate they were. He lightly kissed the top of Harry's head. "I should be the one thanking _you_. Why does it bother you that I'm possessive of you?"

"Don't Tom, you're spoiling the mood," Harry murmured. Tom's embrace went lax. "Fine. I've always been treated like I'm property, someone's pretty little china doll to keep on display. I'm _not_ fragile and I'm _not_ an asset that can be ordered around when the need arises. It's hard to tell if they honestly care about me or they care about my image. At least with you I know you're sincere. They all have two faces; one on their heads and one up my ass. It's annoying."

Tom played with the smaller boy's hair. "What makes you think that I'm sincere?"

"When you're not hiding yourself, your eyes are the windows to your soul. I've become very good at reading people's emotions and you're not an exception just because you're Tom Riddle." Harry sighed, wriggling from Tom's clutches. He moved becoming face to face with Tom, their eyes locking fiercely. "I'm not one to invest my time or my heart into something that only works one way. I've been in that predicament before. I wouldn't allow myself to go through the pain again." Harry touched Tom's face, caressing the soft skin beneath his fingertips. How was it possible that one person could cause him to _feel_ so many different emotions when a crowd of his friends couldn't? "I won't let you go through it either. If this isn't mutual, I want you to tell me. Please, don't play with my heart."

"Here I was thinking it wasn't mutual on your part. Not for the first time when it's concerning you, I'm mistaken." Tom nuzzled the hand on his face. "What is it about me that attracts you? Is it my looks? My power? It can't be for the witty conversation unless you're some kind of masochist."

"Your appearance is the most beautiful I've ever had the privilege to see in my entire life. Your strength is phenomenal. You're an excellent Quidditch player. You're a genius. Let's not forget the _real_ you and not the bastard that you keep as your façade or your other personality that scares me to death. The real you is someone that I could see spending the rest of my life with. He's kind, curious, mischievous, and undeniably innocent. What's _not_ to like about you?"

"The fact that I'm used and worthless as a lover."

Harry stubbornly wrapped his arms around Tom's neck. "It's not your fault that you were used by those fuckers in the past and I don't want to hear you say that again about yourself. As for being worthless as a lover, you're not. I don't know what the hell to do either. I just go with what I feel and if it makes me look like in idiot then so be it. You can't just not hold back because you don't know what you're doing or nothing will ever get done."

"You make it sound so simple," Tom said, frowning. "I'll never be able to fornicate."

Harry's brows shot to his hairline. "Bloody hell, I haven't thought _that_. I'm more worried about kissing, not actual sex." Harry's cheeks turned the same cherry red as Tom's. "What makes you think you won't be able to have sex? I mean, oh Merlin, you know what I'm saying. Not that you're going to have sex with me. Well, I wouldn't say no and I'd probably enjoy. What I'm trying to get at is, why do you think yourself incapable of sex? Are you a eunuch?"

"No, Harry." Tom laughed, shaking his head. "I'm positive all of my appropriate appendages are in their designated places. I'm fine with kissing and the occasional touching but to copulate with you? I'm afraid that all of my memories will make it very difficult to achieve."

"Oh Tom, I don't care about sex. I don't want you for that. I just like being in your presence and holding you. I feel sappy and foolish for admitting that. We're young, Tom, we don't have to rush into anything that we're not ready for."

"Have you forgotten? You're leaving in three months," Tom reminded Harry bitterly. "We don't have _time_ to procrastinate. I'm being unfair, I apologize." Harry knew Tom didn't mean it. "Can we stop talking of this before we argue?" Harry gratefully nodded. The last thing he wanted was to get into a fight with Tom and ruin his chance. "You're my only weakness."

Harry jolted at the admission, wildly staring at Tom. Tom couldn't have figured out the real reason Harry was present at Hogwart's circa 1945. "Your _only_ weakness? You have to have more then one. Everyone usually has several."

"I'll let you know when I think of one," Tom teased. "I'd much rather try what you did to me earlier." Before Harry could protest, Tom's lips were on his, an inquisitive tongue questing for entrance into the cavern of Harry's mouth. Body going completely slack, Harry offered himself to Tom on a silver platter. Tom brought Harry closer to him, their bodies completely molded to the other's with no room to spare. If Harry had been paying any heed to the outside world rather then how unbelievably fantastic it felt to be submissive to Tom, he would have realized that he wasn't alone in his physical lust for Tom. Tom's body was responding eagerly to Harry, the flames of desiring hungrily consuming his body and fueling an intense, _raw_ want. Perhaps it was Harry's fervent surrender underneath him as Tom became dominant, rolling Harry onto his back and perching over him. Or it might have been the enthusiastic passivity of Harry's flaccid body as Tom deepened the kiss even further, his hands exploring the supine body beneath him. All either boy knew was that this was their moment of heaven.

A falling star made its descent from the heavens above, hearing the silent wishes of the two time-crossed young men desperately needing their wishes to be granted if only to save their souls.

..xxx....

_My God! **53** reviews for **one**__chapter?! I'm in complete and total shock. I never imagined in my wildest slasher dreams that I'd get this much of a response. I'm so appreciative that words can't even begin to tell you how much this means to me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart, it makes me feel like I'm **not **wasting my time._

_The link below leads to what I picture Harry and Tom to look like. It's what sparked me to write this story. Just close the spaces._

w w w . h o u s e o f b l a c k . n e t / d o u j i r e v / s c a n s / h a r r y /

Go to the aganai c

Oh and it looks like you all are about tied in what you want me to do with Tom. Either he does to go the future and kills Voldemort or Harry stays in the past. I have several very interesting ideas. My favorite is from the **Great Sarini**.

Thanks to: **Mel, ddz 008, Saavik13, RitGlobe, Akkiko, speed2, Skittles the Sugar Fairy, HoshiHikari, Tamara, Cat, flyingshadow370, anna may, goody2sho, Yana5, Pure Black, Skeet, Randell, Ebony Moonlight, Kiharu-sama, morgain the fairy, Angelfirenze, raintlykalopsic, Neko-Yuki, HecatedeMort, Catriona McCormack, Padfoot, deathscythe, Chiisai Angel, keeyan, swtdreams07, Cicy, Angelic Candy (_as always, your reviews give me so much insight into what to do with this story and my god, once again you hit the nail on the head! Very good. Tom's weakness is himself and then Harry which is going to serve to make things very interesting) _Ivin Artemis Draconis, syaoran and sakura, wingsister, countingcodfish, caecuslupa, who cares, TinuvielBrazilXXI, starswarm, Dark Catalyst, Giara Gryffindor, Morauko, The Great Sarini, Ashi-chan and Ichi, Saranthe, IndigoCat, Knee-shell, Maxennce, Funkegirl, xDestinyx, darkanglefromehell**

_I was wanting to add a sex scene but instead, I decided to just let them snog. Afterall, they might be Tom Riddle and Harry Potter but they **are**__still teenagers with raging hormones. While I'm thinking of it, there is going to be a sex scene in a few chapters. Nothing too graphic, just some nakedness and touching below the waist. Would this squick some of you? Those that **are** interested, let me know now and until the chapter before I decide to add the sex scene so I can send you the link._

_Thank you again! _


	11. Chapter Eleven

Title: On this Cross:

Disclaimers: Not mine

Warnings: Male x Male

_Say hello on a day like today  
Say it everytime you move  
The way that you look at me now  
Makes me wish I was you  
It goes deep  
It goes deeper still  
This touch  
And the smile and the shake of your head..._

**The Smashing Pumpkins, _A Night Like This_**

Chapter Eleven

To put it mildly, Harry was completely and irrevocably confused. It was all centered around the boy nestled in a cocoon of blankets, his dark tresses fanned onto the pillow. Had Harry been asked a month ago if he would ever consider a relationship with another male, he would have more than likely sent a terrible curse at the misfortunate idiot who wanted to know. Now though, not only was Harry attracted to another boy, that boy was none other then Tom Riddle. The time had passed by quickly, bringing about awakening feelings that Harry _never_ thought he'd have. Just the slightest touch from Tom sent a shiver along his spine and the most excruciating heat to well in his nether regions that foretold that he was in fact yearning for Tom.

Lord Voldemort, the incarnation of evil that Tom would become. The Voldemort that Harry knew had crossed the last line of humanity during 1945. After graduating, Voldemort murdered his father and began the arduous study of the Dark Arts that shaped what he was during Harry's time period. _Something_ had to have occurred to cause the handsomely bewitching Tom to be molded into the serpentine Voldemort. For the young man with feelings to develop into a cruel, malevolent slayer. Harry wasn't knowledgeable with the Dark Arts nor did he have the faintest idea as to what one must sacrifice to the practice in order to fully gain the requirements to become a Dark Lord. Did one bargain with their soul in exchange for mastery of the skills? Had Voldemort completely eradicated the Tom Riddle personality, only to lose that which _was_ his humanity? How, though, could Voldemort have extricated the Tom Riddle qualities? Harry had never heard of such a feat being accomplished and yet, it was the only conclusion that Harry had that sounded plausible but utterly impossible. Could Voldemort have been so venomous and angry that the Tom persona vanished on its own without any assistance from magic?

Harry stared at the slumbering figure. There was no denying the fact that Tom was on the verge of becoming Voldemort, that in those eyes was the soul of killer just begging to be released. He'd seen it several times and it scared him like nothing else had ever done. There was also no contradicting that Tom could be saved, that he was incredibly fragile. Harry had seen the gentleness and decency within Tom. Unless Tom was a mastermind at mimicry, Harry believed that Tom was in fact honest in all that Tom claimed he felt for him. Harry knew he should be ashamed for fraternizing with the man who had slaughtered his parents, Cedric, and countless innocents, with the man that had ordered Sirius's death but Harry couldn't. Tom was special, so different from any other person that Harry had ever met in his life. He made Harry _feel_ without having to use a sham of happiness as he did frequently around his friends. How could he loathe someone that did _that_ to him? Tom allowed him past barriers upon barriers that had been erected in order to keep people like Harry from seeing the real Tom Riddle and that was the sole reason _why_ Harry chose to keep getting closer to Tom. The mission to discover Voldemort's weakness was no longer his objective. His intent was to prevent Tom from becoming Lord Voldemort, to change Tom's mind about becoming a benefactor of evil. It was already progressing into phenomenal proportions that was steadily turning into more then he could control, more then he _wanted _to control.

December seemed bleaker as the days passed by and Harry found he didn't _want _ to return home with people that didn't understand him. Either they kissed the ground he walked on or they treated him like a child. The only two people he could speak to were Remus and Severus and even they held a golden halo on him. Yet, Harry knew he had to return to his time. Voldemort had to be defeated once and for all to put an end to his tyranny but could Harry do that? Could he actually consciously kill Voldemort knowing that he was once Tom Riddle? Would the sin of slaying Voldemort weigh heavily on his mind forever? But, Voldemort wasn't Tom any longer, was he? Would Harry's conception of time traveling be proved false, that there was not another dimension being created but that which was happening in the past was now affecting the present? Was Voldemort remembering a life he had had with Harry in 1945 while in 1999?

Harry sighed, pressing his fingertips to his forehead. There was no point ruminating over that which he did not have answers. "You're thinking too much." Harry jolted at the liquid silken voice that interrupted Harry's musings. Tom was grinning serenely at him from underneath the blankets that he'd become tangled in. "The more you ponder, the more likely you are to carry conversations with yourself or inanimate objects. I talk with myself constantly, just not aloud."

Harry smiled, ignoring the questions still lingering. "Is that so? Maybe I should get inside your head and see what all you talk about. I bet I'm the main topic." Cheekily winking, Harry slipped into Tom's bed and burrowed into the mess of blankets. "How did you know that I was still awake?" Harry inquired, crossing his arms in front of his chest and staring at the ceiling.

Tom yawned adorably. "It's something that I can tell. Call me insane but, it's almost as if we've been linked." Tom sighed, propping himself on his elbow in order to gaze at Harry. "I've been contemplating why I'm addicted to you, why I'm allowing myself to become a person that I thought had been lost long ago. Do you think it an odd notion that we could be linked by magic?"

Harry shrugged. "I don't know. I'm not familiar with any sort of magic that could link two people. I suppose the possibility isn't unachievable." Harry frowned at Tom. "Why? Do you know of any spells that can bond two people together?"

Tom nodded. "There are two that I know of. _Vita_ _Iugo_, which simply connects two lives that doesn't necessarily have to deal with love. Friends can have _Vita Iugo_. Then, there's _Vinculum Amor_ that brings two ideal partners together. _Vinculum Amor_ occurs when two souls are intertwined, most often before either member are born. _Vinculum Amor_, when awakened, always disarrays' both participants conceptions, invoking thoughts that one would never have had before."

Harry pursed his lips. Yes, that sounded commendable but Harry already had a connection with Tom. The scar on his forehead bound him to Voldemort, however, not to Tom Riddle. _Vinculum Amor_ would have joined Voldemort and Harry in the future, not just the past. A sudden thought dawned on Harry. Was _Vinculum Amor_ the real reason that Voldemort's curse had been returned to him because they were bound and the magic wouldn't allow Voldemort to kill Harry? Was it just not fully awakened in Harry's time? Harry felt his stomach tighten. If Harry's hypothesis was true, then Voldemort and Harry were connected just like Tom and Harry. "Do you know any more about _Vinculum Amor_?"

"_Vinculum Amor_ can take as short as a week to as long as a century to be invoked. There are certain versions of _Vinculum Amor_. The two main ones are either intense infatuation, which is the form we're experiencing and then there is the darker type. The darker mode causes enmity between the pair and results in a hatred that lingers for the remainder of both participants lives; _if_ they live to old age, that is. The loathing is so deep that neither can settle until the other is dead."

Harry's lips parted in shock, confusion, and utter pain. _Vinculum Amor_ explained the abhorrence that Harry and Voldemort felt for one another, the longing to destroy the other. It also clarified the severe passion that Harry and Tom were being subjected to. With Harry's time traveling to 1945, the lighter side of _Vinculum Amor_ had been summoned. If _Vinculum Amor_ was in fact the reason for Voldemort's curse being reflected, then the cause that Harry had been told for seven years was obliterated. His parents love had nothing to do with Harry being spared from death. Harry felt a tender hand on his chest. Tom's jade eyes were full of concern at Harry's unease. Harry felt his entrails knot further. Was this entire _thing_ nothing more then a charade caused by _Vinculum Amor_? That all of the emotions that he and Tom were having were derived from magic, that it wasn't sincere?

Without a word to Tom, Harry sprinted from the bed and through the door.

..xxx...

The calm wind rippled the clear waters of the lake peacefully, quieting Harry's rapid pulse. He hugged his knees to his chest and watched disinterestedly at the mer-folk frolicking in the distance. The sun was peaking above the mountain range, the sky an artists' palette. It would be time for breakfast and then classes. He would have to face Tom soon and explain himself. To know that _nothing_ he felt was factual, that it was all a lie from a spell. Magic being involved meant that Harry had not consciously felt, dare he admit, love towards Tom. It was magic being forced upon them both, forcing them to feel that which was not possible; that which made no sense at all. It cleared up why Harry felt the incessant urge to ravish Tom when a month ago he'd never considered kissing another boy. If it was _only _magic, why did Harry feel a void in his heart?

"Mister Potter, you are awake rather early. Is something troubling you?" Albus inquired, azure eyes twinkling in the morning sun. "Have your injuries healed?"

Harry nodded, not looking at the professor. "I'm fine. Actually, I want to ask you something and I'd appreciate the truth. How much about me do you know? How much has your future self told you?"

Albus chuckled, hands folding behind his back. "Ah. I see. You are wondering whether or not I can explain your fascination with Tom Riddle, are you not?" Harry kept silent. "Your Dumbledore has only told me about Tom's transforming into the Dark Lord Voldemort. Dumbledore only wishes you to be safe because he remembers what Tom was like; arrogant, haughty, cruel, cold, unmerciful. He is blind to the human side of Tom that Voldemort rid himself of. You have brought forth that human side, supplanting the Voldemort part as the submissive. I am being very selfish for allowing your and Tom's relationship to escalate into more then we all have bargained for. I know that in this time, after Grindelwald is defeated, that there will not be a Dark Lord for Tom Riddle will remain Tom Riddle." Albus smiled at Harry, seeing the boy's face lose some of the sorrow. "Your coming to the past has caused a rift in time. You were beseeched not to interfere, to _only_ befriend Tom and learn his weakness. You have fallen in love with Tom and if I am not mistaken, that is to be said for Tom's behalf as well. Because of this, the future that is yours will remain status quo but the future that is mine will be much, much different. All that will happen, is now forgotten. Only myself and you know what should have came to pass."

Harry sighed, jaws clenching. "Then you're deliberately keeping me and Tom together for your own personal gain. You know all that has happened in the future from Albus so you know what is going to occur should Tom become Lord Voldemort."

"Yes, I know but I was wise enough to not intervene. You have done that deed for me though completely oblivious."

Harry rose to his feet, nodding. "I understand. Through me, your future is secured as are those that I have come to love in my time. I just wonder, how much will be changed in this age. After Grindelwald, the threats will be gone. I-"

"That is not your concern, Harry." Albus patted the boy's shoulder. "This is no longer your time. Now, I sense there is a question that you wish to ask me."

"Tom mentioned a spell called _Vinculum Amor._ Is that what we share?"

"Tom's a genius, an intellect whose mind prowess is beyond my own, even though he's much younger then I am. He was correct in assuming that _Vinculum Amor_ is the cause for your intense obsession with each other and that your own assumptions regarding Lord Voldemort are in fact valid. However, you need not despair. In order for a binding spell to work, the two members involved must possess just an inkling of feelings for one another. You and Tom must have felt the beginnings of attraction the very moment you laid eyes on the other. That is the only way that _Vinculum Amor_ could have made itself known. It works on either mutual attraction or mutual hate. In your case, you have both." Albus's eyes twinkled with more amusement. "You came here because you thought that it was _only_ because of _Vinculum Amor_ that you and Tom were interested in each other, am I right?"

Harry laughed, shaking his head at his folly. "I'm a fool. I didn't give Tom a chance to tell me the rest of what he knew about _Vinculum Amor_. I was hurt. It felt like all that I'd ever lived for had suddenly come crashing down on me. He must be mad at me. Albus, I need your honest opinion." One white brow rose. "When I leave for home, will Tom become Voldemort? Will all that I've been bringing forth from his soul be destroyed upon my abandonment? Is there no way that I can be with him when my time is through?"

"That is for you to decide. You know the answer. It's in your heart already. Now, I must be going to breakfast. I hear the Elves are making French Toast."

The answer in his heart... Harry's hand went to his chest, fisting. "The answer," Harry whispered. Yes, the answer was there but he didn't know if he had the courage to do it.

..xxx...

"Harry!" Romulus screeched, embracing the smaller boy cheerfully. "I'd thought with the way Tom's been pacing and rampaging that you were nothing more then a pile of ashes. We'd thought he'd killed you and from the look in his eyes, I was fearing the worst!" Romulus eagerly led Harry by the hand towards the Great Hall. "Septimus is already waiting inside. Anyway, what happened between you and Tom last night? A lover's tiff?"

Harry snorted, following the nonchalant boy into the Great Hall. "No, it wasn't an argument. I did something stupid and now I'm going to pay for it. Look, I'd like to join you and Septimus but I really need to talk to Tom. I'd rather not have him blow the school up, you know?" Romulus pouted. "I'm sorry. If it makes you feel any better, I'll come with you tonight to the lake, alright?"

"Well...okay. I guess that can compensate. Try and drag Tom with you." Romulus winked, leaving Harry to roll his eyes at the go-lucky attitude Romulus had. Just like Sirius. Harry ignored the melancholy stealing through him at the image of Sirius that was produced. Happy, smiling, laughing and yet, Harry knew almost nothing about Sirius. Why on earth was he so sad about his death? They'd hardly had time to talk before he died. Most of what Harry knew about Sirius came from Remus. Still, the hole in his heart where Sirius had been was ever present.

Harry swallowed the lump in his throat as he whispered the password to the Slytherin Tower, summoning his legendary Gryffindor courage. Resounding crashes and the yell of hexes could be heard as Harry entered the Common Room. Several first years went scurrying towards Harry, one was holding a bleeding shoulder. "Damn," Harry cursed, drawing his wand. Two third years scuttled from the staircase. Harry grabbed one by the arm. "What in the hell is going on up there?"

"It's Tom. He's lost it."

Harry rushed towards Tom's Head Boy room. "Tom?" Harry hesitantly opened the door. The place was a mess, furniture strewn everywhere, pages of books scattered on the floor, and much to Harry's disbelief, he heard faint sounds of weeping. "Tom?" He walked slowly towards the bathroom lest the toilette be thrown viciously from the door but nothing came. On the floor, head in his hands, Tom Riddle was sobbing. The bathroom was in shambles and Harry had the idea that the state of the room was the same state in which Tom was; broken and shattered. "I shouldn't have left like that and I'm sorry."

Tom raised his head, crimson eyes bloodshot and cheeks streaked with saline. "Is that so? I don't think you are. You heard that you were bound to me and the thought disgusts you. Besides, who would want to be bound to me anyway. With binding comes a lifetime commitment where we'd have to rely upon one another until our dieing day and then beyond. Bindings are not meant to be taken lightly. They are connection that even death cannot end. I don't blame you. After all, you're just like the rest of them. You've finally showed me your true colors."

"That's not true and you know it." Harry knelt beside of Tom, taking his hands into his own. Tom yanked but Harry tightened the hold. "I have seven years of Quidditch under my belt, I'm not easily physically deterred. You told me about the spell and I thought that what we're feeling was _only_ because of _Vinculum Amor_, not that we honestly _are_ feeling something. I felt my heart break when I thought that what's happening is fake. I shouldn't have run off like that, not when you needed me just as much as I needed you then. I understand the binding spell more, now and I know that if we weren't starting to fall for each other then it would have never began. What I'm trying to say is; I'm prepared to sacrifice all that I know in order to be with you."

"Harry, that's more than I could have ever asked for but what about when you go home?" Tom gazed at Harry wide-eyed. "I can't ask you to stay with me."

"That's why you're going with me." Tom's lips parted in shock. Harry had made his decision, this was his answer. "I don't want you to argue with me and if you don't see us making it past a couple of weeks then I have to know. Will you do me the honor of joining me when I go home? It might be weird for a little while until my friends get used to you and Merlin knows that it'll take me getting used to as well but come December the 20th, you _are_ joining me on my return voyage home."

"You don't leave room for any argument," Tom said, somewhat breathlessly. "Then you want this binding to be permanent? You want us to...branch into the full degree of the bond? Do you know what the entails? You get the entire package; my mind, my body, my heart, and my soul and I get yours as well. Bonded mates have been known to read the other's thoughts, to be able to cast simultaneous, powerful spells, to even have emotional orgasms during sexual intercourse. We could rule the world."

"Or just live in quiet peace for the rest of our days. Why does ruling the world appeal to you so much? Does not growing old together without worry not appeal to you in the same sense of dictating the world?" Harry frowned, holding Tom's hands to his chest. "But, my heart beats for you and for you alone and, if you want to continue with your quest to dominate the planet then I will be by your side. I just, I'd rather have the simple life. You know, children, pets, gardens, the whole fairytale ending to our affair."

Tom smiled, kissing Harry's nose. "I'd like that as well but my goal is to purge this planet of the filthy Muggles that are destroying it. After that, we can have your life. Look, it's a long time from now. Let's just enjoy the moment, the here and now." Tom wound his strong arms around Harry's neck, resting his head against Harry's. "We'll have our happily ever after, Harry. I promise."

_Yes, and you'll both be the next Dark Lords. Honestly, Harry, what **have** you gotten yourself into? You just promised Tom Riddle a one-way ticket to 1999 where Lord Voldemort is wanting to end your life. How are you going to explain his presence to the Order? _

Yes, how indeed...but as Tom said, it was the here and now that mattered. When the time came, Harry would think of the consequences of his actions.

...xxx...

_60 reviews?!!! Have I lost my vision or are there actually that many? Whoo-pee!! I thank you all from the bottom of my heart. It makes my day to see that much interest. Most of you agree to a sex scene and yes, you can expect one next chapter though nothing too vivid. Just like I said before, just some naked naughtiness without penetration. Hee hee. Anyway, I've been contemplating what to do with my two lovely boys. I figured there needed to be some sort of explanation for the hastiness of their infatuation. What was better then a bond? This bond will be bringing some much needed angst as well as much needed happiness. Harry has made up his mind that Tom will be going with him to 1999 and I can't say that I blame him. After all, the sheer looks of shock on the Order's faces will be much fun to write. I'm so evil. haahahaha! _

_As I've read over my work, I noticed that I put that Septimus, Aleron, and Romulus were Severus's, Lucius's, and Sirius's grandfathers. That's not the case. The three aforementioned are the latter's sons. I apologize. _

_Thank you again, my wonderful reviewers! _


	12. Chapter 12

Title: On This Cross

Warnings and Disclaimers: I don't own Harry Potter and this is boy x boy. If it squicks you then why the hell are you on chapter twelve:-/

Notes: Oh right, there's a lemon and I have to admit, it's a pretty short, very horribly written one. You'll notice that Tom is a bit out of character. Love does all sorts of queer things to the mind. There are similarities between HBP but it doesn't necessarily delve into the book. It's kind of AU but kind of not. Does that make sense? I didn't think so. :-(

Chapter Twelve

Harry stared across the expanse of the Quidditch field. The snow lazily drifted to the ground but Harry barely even felt the flakes dampening his face. It was peaceful sitting in the Slytherin wing of the stadium without any intrusions from prying eyes and eavesdropping ears. It was serene to be by himself in order to calm his raging nerves and hostile anger. He and Tom had just experienced their first argument as a couple. It killed Harry to keep battling the demons inside of Tom. He knew there had to be an escape for Tom but Tom refused to listen to sanity. Now, Harry could only hope that Tom forgave him; that his last resort hadn't ended their relationship.

It had started as a normal day with Tom studying by the fire and Harry playing chess with an imaginary opponent. Then, Harry had to open his big mouth…

_"Wouldn't it be nice if we could be like this in oh, let's say, ten years or so?" Harry glanced at Tom. The other boy slowly lifted his eyes from his book to Harry and for a second, Harry felt his blood curdle at the emotionless void in Tom's eyes. "I mean, we could adopt a couple of kids, have a bunch of pets, the whole nine yards. It'd be great," Harry said, knowing he was walking a treacherous line with Tom._

_"Are you living in a dream bubble, Harry?" Tom asked, chuckling. "Kids? Pets? The future Dark Lord can't have hindrances to his mission to destroy all Muggles and rule the entire world. It wouldn't be fitting."_

_"Fitting?" Harry gaped, scoffing. "Am I hindrance, Tom? Really, do you think about me and wonder what sort of trouble I'm going to cause you or what everyone's going to think once they find out about us?"_

_"No one's going to find out," Tom snapped. "I intend to keep this a closely guarded secret. Septimus and Romulus's minds will be erased as soon as I brew the potion." Tom rose to his feet and crossed the living room towards Harry. He tilted Harry's chin with one of his fingers. "What did you expect from me? Flowers and poetry? I'm not a sappy romantic and any hopes you have of that need to be eradicated immediately."_

_Harry swallowed the lump in his throat. His eyes stung with tears but he wouldn't shed them. He wouldn't show Tom he was most afraid of him and the prospect of losing him. "You want me to live my entire life as a lie? We have to hide us? Why? I thought you didn't care about homosexuality. It shouldn't even concern you!" _

_"I will be the next Dark Lord and no lord has a significant other that they must rely on. I care for you, Harry. More then I should." Tom caressed Harry's cheek but to Harry, it was only a mocking touch that caused his entrails to knot and the bile to rise in his throat. "You'll warm my bed."_

_Harry winced as if he'd been slapped. "So I'm to be your whore?"_

_"I didn't"_

_"But you did!" Harry interrupted Tom, quickly standing. He started pacing; never a good sign. "What the fuck is your deal?" Harry snarled, sadness dissolving into an anger that he hadn't directed at Tom since meeting him. "You should have never gotten yourself involved with me if you only had plans of manipulating me into being your pretty china doll merely to keep on display until needed."_

_"Stop it!" Tom bellowed, green eyes blending with scarlet. "Stop," he repeated, hands clenching into fists as his sides. "You're being irrational."_

_"Irrational?! How am I being irrational? You just said, quote un quote, 'you'll warm my bed.' What is that supposed to mean? You know what, don't even bother answering. I don't want to hear it. What will you sacrifice in order to obtain your warped idea of perfection? There's always a price to pay for power."_

_"I'll sacrifice anything in order to gain the strength I want," Tom growled._

"_You just don't get it all, do you?!" Harry screamed, close to tears but not daring to succumb to the need to sob. "One day, you'll regret this. You'll hate yourself. You won't even recognize yourself! But you think you've got it so damn tough, well, you don't! You need to take it in, Tom. Is it all worth it? Losing me? Your humanity? Is it worth betraying your own soul?"_

"_From the way you talk, it's like you know," Tom breathed, all at once realizing that Harry held even darker secrets then perhaps his own. Harry's features instantly deceived him as he met Tom's awed stare. "What are you hiding from me, Harry? You want me to be a devoted lover but you can't even tell me everything about yourself."_

"_I can't. I'm sorry," Harry sighed. "We need some time apart. We both need to decide how important…we are to each other. We have to know if this is more then a fling because to be honest, I don't know if I can be your lover when you take on the rituals to be a Dark Lord. I don't think I could live with myself if I were attached to a man that takes pleasure in killing others in cold blood. I know I said I'd be by your side when the time came but I have to reevaluate my feelings for you." He didn't even bother looking at Tom as he left their chambers. He wouldn't live a lie even if it cost him the only reason worth living._

"You okay?" Harry glanced up to see Romulus standing on the bleachers. "You look like shit, Harry. Had a fight, huh?" he asked taking a seat beside of the dark-haired boy. "Me too. I can't get through to Septimus. His mind's set that I'm just going to use him for sex and once I've gotten what I want, I'll leave him. I don't know how to convince him that I do care for him. What do you think?"

"Do you think…maybe he knows about Sahila? Perhaps his sister's told him about her soon to be engagement to you."

"…You think so?" Romulus asked softly, eyes dimming from their usual brilliance. "I don't want her, damn it! I want Septimus but I can't even kiss him without begging. Why can't I live my life for myself? Why does it always have to revolve around what my parents want and what they want for me? I want him, I love him, I need him." Romulus angrily wiped the tears coursing his cheeks. "But what's the point? I have to find a woman to marry and produce an heir. I can't do it, Harry. I can't pretend to be happy with a woman when my heart beats for a man. I know it's wrong and immoral but…well…love's love. It shouldn't matter what form it's in." Romulus smiled wanly at Harry. "What about you, Harry? What's bothering you?"

"About the same as yours," Harry said, wrapping an arm around Romulus's shoulders, pulling the other boy closer to him. "You can only trust to hope, Rom. Everything will work out the way it's supposed to." Harry grinned though inside he was aching. "Come on, it's getting dark. Are you hungry?"

Romulus laughed. "When am I not? Thanks, Harry. I appreciate it." Harry blushed as Romulus stared at him and for several seconds, Harry didn't dare to breathe. Harry felt nervous and for the life of him, he couldn't explain it. Romulus broke the deafening silence as his stomach growled furiously. "Um, I'll see you at dinner," he muttered and nearly ran for the castle.

Harry stared at Romulus's retreating figure, thoughts shifting from Romulus to Tom. He wouldn't be able to avoid him at dinner and it would be even harder to once Harry decided to return to their rooms and gather his belongings. He wasn't positive on where he'd stay for the remainder of his mission but he couldn't be around Tom. He knew it would hurt him but at the same time, it would kill him to be within the same vicinity of Tom.

…

Dinner was uneventful as Tom didn't make his presence known at the Great Hall. Harry wasn't as relieved as he figured he would have been. If anything, Tom was in his rooms gathering his thoughts together. Septimus and Romulus weren't speaking and Romulus was so different from his normal self that he was amassing all sorts of speculation regarding his demeanor shift. There were several girls seeking to gain his attention but Harry refused to acknowledge their flirtatious advances.

"Harry, wait up!" Romulus called, jogging to catch up with Harry.

"What is it?" Harry asked, not able to meet Romulus's gaze. He murmured the password to the Ice Queen and stepped inside Slytherin Common Room. "I have to get my things. I guess I'm sleeping down here until the headmaster and can find me another place to stay." When Romulus didn't speak for a couple of minutes, Harry felt the mood in the room change drastically. He could feel his cheeks heat with every minute that drifted by and Romulus's eyes didn't stray from his own. "Romulus?" Harry breathed, backing up as Romulus hesitantly approached him.

Harry had to admit that he hadn't been anticipating it but somehow, he'd known it would happen sooner or later. Romulus brushed his lips against Harry's. Harry's eyes widened as he saw the amount of pure desperation clouding Romulus's blue eyes. "I won't go any further if you don't want me to," he murmured against Harry's lips. Harry knew he should have stopped but he was feeling as lonely as Romulus. He wrapped his arms around Romulus's waist and leaned in for another kiss. The kiss didn't mean anything to either of them. That at the moment they only had each other. It was comforting to know that someone else cared about them and while they both knew it was incredibly wrong, they didn't stop it.

Harry felt the edge of one of the couches pressing against his legs and gently slumped against it, pulling Romulus down on top of him to straddle his hips. He and Tom had been this intimate before, it never leading into actual intercourse due to Tom's hesitation. Romulus had plenty of experience with other boys; all Harry to go on was his vivid, over-active imagination. In Harry's mind, it wasn't Romulus he was kissing and touching, but it was Tom.

He was roaming his hands across the heated skin of Tom's perfect body. His defined pectorals, leanly muscled arms, sculpted abdominal. He'd memorized every detail of Tom's body; the scars, the lines of his muscles, and all the erogenous regions that he delighted in tormenting in order to give Tom all the bliss he could handle. He enjoyed pleasuring Tom. It brought him satisfaction when he sent Tom over the edge and into orgasm. The openness of Tom's face was always enough for Harry to actually believe that Tom loved him.

"Romulus?"

"Harry?"

Both boy's eyes snapped open to hone in on Septimus and Tom. They hastily withdrew their steamy embrace. "This isn't what you think it is," Romulus immediately began but the betrayed look Septimus sent in his direction coincidentally royally pissed him off. "Fuck you, Septimus Snape! I would do anything for you and you can't even give me a chance to prove it to you! I don't want your sister!"

Septimus sighed. "I didn't think you knew about my parents plans."

"I knew. I've known. I only want you. Why can't you trust me and have a little faith in me?"

Harry smiled wanly as he watched Septimus hold onto Romulus for dear life. He ascended the stairs, not even bothering with Tom. He didn't need to hear Tom's accusations. He could hear Tom's footsteps behind him and as he entered their living quarters, he felt Tom's hand on his shoulder. "What do you want?"

"I'm not going to ask what that was going on between you and Romulus. Obviously you aren't happy with me. I can't offer you everything that he can. I hope you're happy with him, Harry." Tom clenched his jaw tightly but Harry knew that Tom was lying. The pain in Tom's eyes was enough to send Harry into hysterics and tears were streaming his face that he couldn't prevent.

"In my head, I was with you! I don't want Romulus but I'm lonely. I love you more then you think, Tom."

"I know you do," Tom said, wiping the tears from Harry's cheeks. "I know," he repeated, sighing. "I've thought about what you told me this morning. I choose you. I'll…forego my plans to become a Dark Lord but only if you promise me you'll be with me for the rest of our lives. Promise me that you won't break my heart," he said and for the first time in years, Tom Riddel cried.

Harry was stricken dumb with silence as he watched those beautiful, green eyes fill with tears. He'd never imagined in his wildest dreams that he'd witness the day when Tom Riddel broke down, when his walls of seemingly impenetrable indifference were demolished. Harry held Tom and let the other boy dampen his shirt with his sobs. How long had Tom been holding in all these feelings of sorrow? "I won't hurt you, Tom. Not knowingly," he whispered, stroking Tom's hair in an effort to soothe him.

"I love you Harry," Tom said, raising his face to gaze into Harry's eyes. Harry's heart skipped several beats at the honesty dancing across Tom's visage. "I'm ready to show you how much I care but only if you're willing to teach me how to. I want you to make love to me. Show me how it's supposed to be done and not the way I was taught."

Harry immediately felt himself harden and he didn't need to be told again as he led Tom into their bedroom. "I don't know everything about sex," Harry admitted, locking the door behind them. That was an understatement. The only reason he knew anything about sex was because Seamus Finnegan and his need to exploit his sexual escapades to every one within a one mile radius. Seamus had been one of the most promiscuous boys in their class and had even dabbled in homosexual erotica. Ergo, the reason Harry had a general idea as to what was bound to happen between him and Tom.

"I don't care. Do what feels right. I'm fine with anything," Tom grinned, taking Harry's hand into his and placing it on his bulging crotch. Harry's breath caught in his throat. He hadn't even touched he other boy and he was already rock hard. "Just…be gentle."

"Take your clothes off," Harry smirked, unbuttoning Tom's trousers for him and kneeling on the floor. Tom's shirt quickly followed. "You're so beautiful," he murmured, languidly allowing him the pleasure of taking in Tom in all his naked glory. "You didn't wear skivvies," Harry noticed, laughing. "You had this in mind, didn't you?"

"That's a secret. Would you mind doing something about it or are you going to stare at it all night?" Tom gestured to his cock.

"I wouldn't dream of leaving you anything less then satiated but if we're going all the way, I think I'm just going to tease you." Harry winked up at Tom as his tongue flicked out to lick the head of Tom's dick. "But…who's bottoming?"

Tom growled, hands curling into his lover's hair. "You are."

"Is that a fact?"

"Yes," Tom hissed as Harry engulfed his cock into his mouth. They'd done this countless times before but it felt dissimilar. Perhaps it was because this was only the precursor to copulation. Perhaps he was hornier then he'd ever been due to his admitting his love for Harry. It made it feel more special, more intense and it seemed to of had an effect on Harry as well. He was going at his cock as it were a lollipop. Harry had never been this passionate. He couldn't suppress the moan that escaped his lips. He was usually extremely silent during their acts of fornication but this wasn't those instances.

"Bed," Harry breathed, hastily disposing of his clothes before falling onto Tom's bed. He was delightfully surprised when Tom straddled his hips, their cocks coming into contact. The unfamiliar form of male sexual contact sent shivers through both their bodies. "Fuck," Harry nearly whimpered, spreading his legs. "Tom, please."

"You don't want me to do anything to you?"

"I'm so fucking hot right now that if you did do anything, I don't think I'd last very long. Prepare me, okay?" He earned a curious look from Tom. "You're the one that can use wandless magic. Produce some sort of lubricant." Without a single word, Tom had created a small bottle of lotion. "Use that to make it easier for your fingers to go inside me." Harry felt his entire body blush at having to give Tom instructions on loosening him in order to prevent any pain from Tom's rather large erection.

"Ah," Tom said, grinning. He slowly inserted one of fingers into Harry, cock twitching at how incredibly tight and warm he was. No woman could ever feel this good. "How does it feel? Am I hurting you?" Tom inquired, raising his eyes from his handiwork to gaze at one of the most erotic expressions he'd ever seen. "I guess not."

"Add another finger," Harry nearly snarled, hands gripping the sheet. He'd known it would be amazing but not this fucking remarkable. Tom watched Harry's face, at the myriad display of emotions. It almost made Tom want to be the one taking it but he figured there'd be plenty of time for that. It just might take him a little longer to submit. "Now," Harry could have cried with how it felt.

Tom braced himself against Harry's waist, knees nudging apart Harry's leg. Inch by inch he eased inside Harry foregoing the need to pound into Harry until he was used to the intrusion. Harry grimaced at the pain but as quickly as the pain had appeared, mind blowing pleasure took it's place. "Move, damn it!" Harry snapped, driving his hips against Tom. Tom obliged, pounding into Harry with such a frenzy that both of them were moaning loud enough to give anyone in the living room a show.

"I won't break," Harry said, nails digging into Tom's shoulders. "We can take longer next time."

They knew they weren't going to last long; that they'd been waiting for this moment for what seemed like an eternity. It was all about the need to feel complete. To know that there was another that held your sentiments. Sometimes, physical acts mean more then words for words are unable to explain your exact desire and adoration of your partner. Both young men came at the same moment and confessed their deepest love. As they basked in the aftermath, Harry couldn't control his tears.

Tom frowned and held Harry against him. "Harry? What's wrong? I didn't hurt you did I?" he asked, pressing soft kisses to Harry's forehead.

"No. I'm crying because I'm happy," Harry murmured against Tom's chest. "You're all I've ever really wanted, Tom. Even if things get a little confusing soon, don't ever doubt that I love you. Because they will be strange. If either of us should die because of what we share I'll be content knowing that I was able to experience a love like this."

Before Tom could question Harry the other boy was already asleep. Tom had never heard Harry speak so cryptically. He wound his fingers into Harry's dark tresses and stared at the ceiling. Tom was starting to realize that he couldn't predict the future and that he most certainly couldn't change the present. His ambitions had been all but destroyed by the boy wrapped in his arms. He knew he was powerful even without being crowned Dark Lord but what repercussions would this cause? Would love make him weak? Tom glanced at Harry. No, if anything, love made him invincible. He couldn't believe that he would have forfeited these feelings had he traveled to Romania. What would come, would come and he'd have to face it but not alone. Not anymore.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Tom was perturbed. So far, Harry had managed to evade all his concerns revolving the secrets Harry kept well-guarded. Tom had thought about using Veritaserum but he figured that would only serve to piss his boyfriend royally off. Tom was worried. Harry hardly ate and barely slept and when he did sleep, it was always plagued by nightmares. Tom couldn't do anything but comfort him. He watched Harry busying himself with brewing a potion that Tom knew wasn't correct. Tom quickly scribbled the reverse ingredients on a piece of parchment and tossed it at Harry.

Harry met Tom's amused smirk with a shy grin and scanned the instructions Tom had given. He added the ingredients and was amazed as the potion actually turned the right color and consistency. He flashed Tom one of his million dollar smiles and he resisted the urge to roll his eyes as several girls giggled in his general direction. He would have liked to have told them mind their own damn business. Besides, he was positive Tom would have done the same. Harry's smile faded as his thoughts drifted to telling Tom the truth about himself. It would have to happen sooner then later for in another week, he'd be going home and taking Tom with him.

"Are you avoiding me?" a voice from behind Harry as he walked towards the Great Hall. He turned to see Romulus. "I think you are. You haven't spoken two words to me since that night in the Common Room. Nothing happened. I don't know why you're acting like something did. We were both thinking about other people."

"I know and I'm sorry. It's just…well…I don't want Tom to think anything. He's not the most trusting being alive if you hadn't noticed."

"No shit," Romulus scoffed. "Stop acting as if I have the plague. I care about you Harry and we understand each other. Besides, who else do we have to complain to when our boyfriend's are being asses?"

"You're right. No hard feelings?"

"None," Romulus said, grinning and tossing his arms around Harry.

"Not this again," Septimus growled, arms crossed in front of his chest.

"We made up," Romulus stuck his tongue out. "Come on, I'm hungry!"

Harry laughed as Romulus led Septimus to the Great Hall by his hand. He was scared and excited to be going home. He didn't know what all had changed since his departure. Were any of his loved ones dead? Was Voldemort even stronger? How would everyone react to Tom? Would they hex him the moment they laid their eyes on him? Would they be understanding of Harry's sexual orientation and his relationship with Tom? Harry sighed. His friends had no idea he was even gay let alone in love with the boy that would become the worst Dark Lord to have ever lived.

"A pound for your thoughts," Tom's warm breath against Harry's ear sent chills winding down his spine. "You've been acting odd lately. I think it's about time you tell me everything. I want to know what's going on inside your mind, Harry. I can't help if you aren't willing to let me in."

"Not here," Harry said, taking a turn and heading down a deserted corridor. "There's a room that no one can enter not far from here. It only exists if the person knows about it. Tom, when I do tell you, promise me you'll listen unbiased. If you wish to not be with anymore I'll understand. I've kept something from you that I shouldn't have. There are things about me that'll probably make you hate me."

Just as Harry had said, a room appeared. Tom glanced around the surroundings. It was fairly dim and lit with only candles lining the perimeter. Pillows were sporadically dotting the floor. "If I didn't know any better, I'd think that you were going to seduce me," Tom teased, sitting on a pile of the comfortable pillows. "So, what is it? What's so devious that I might end up hating you when all's said and done?"

"…I'm from the year 2006 and right now, my friends are in involved in a war with the Dark Lord Voldemort."

"What?" Tom's brows furrowed. Voldemort had been his chosen name had he pursued his ambition. "What the hell are you on, Harry?"

"I'm not lying. I can tell you things about yourself that haven't come to pass in this time yet. In a few years, you'll find out where your father's at and you'll kill him. You wanted no ties to a human that didn't merit any worth in your eyes. You were a bastard and your father wanted nothing to do with you. Your mother had kept him in her clutches through a potion or magic but as time went by, she released him. She thought that he may have fallen in love with her without using her powers. He quickly abandoned her. You were placed in an orphanage where you where you came to know that you weren't like those other stupid, ignorant children. You had powers that you coveted.

"You were cruel and used your magic to cause others harm. One day, a wizard came to the orphanage and inquired about you. He took you to Hogwart's in hopes of somehow convincing you to use your awesome powers for good. Albus Dumbledore was deceived. You became a menace but no one would have ever doubted you. You were handsome, charming, and intelligent. People fell for you. It was after the incident with the basilisk and Myrtle that Dumbledore saw you for what you actually were.

"After leaving Hogwart's, you went to Romania where you found the existence of the Horcux. You were able to divide your soul into seven pieces and make yourself immortal. You were a terror that caused countless deaths of both wizards and Muggles but those with tainted blood were your main target. The Order of the Phoenix was formed in order to fight you. You discovered the location of two of the members, Lily and James Potter, and sought to destroy them. However, something happened that you didn't plan. You went face to face with someone that inhabited a charm that even you couldn't have predicted. You used Avada Kedavra on a baby but your curse was reflected back to you. The baby was protected by the oldest ward; love. You were killed except for the bits and pieces of your soul you'd salvaged. The baby lived to become your greatest enemy and some of your powers were transferred to the baby. In this scar," Harry said, parting his hair and revealing the lightning bolt scar.

"For years I've fought you. I've prevailed in the end each time. The first year, you'd taken over the body of one of the professors at Hogwart's and through him you sought the Elixir of Life but once again, my parents love for me caused the death of Quirrel. The second year you took over the mind and body of one of my friends. You used her in order to open the Chamber of Secrets. That's where I first met Tom Riddel. You had preserved a piece of your soul in a diary so that you could one day unleash the basilisk on Mud bloods. I defeated it and destroyed the diary though at the time I didn't know I also destroyed one of the Horcuxes.

"My third year was one of my favorites. I discovered that I had a godfather but he'd been wrongfully framed by one of your underlings and sent to Azkaban. He escaped, thankfully, and I was given my first hope. The Dementors were on your side and I thought I was going to die until I was able to go back in time and use my Patronus to save both my life and my godfather's. Fourth year was the worst. Another one of your men assumed the identity of another teacher. I never knew that he was actually one of your pets in disguise. The Goblet of Fire was going on and I was one of the contestants. You'd hoped that I would have died during each of the challenges but I didn't. Like always, I was able to stop you from killing me but you killed another boy. You used my blood in order to regain your body. Through the help of those that you'd killed, I escaped back to Hogwart's but I was different.

"The fifth year, you were able to enter my mind and I was inadvertently able to see your next step. In doing so, I led my godfather to his death. You'd used my mind against me. I had my friends with me as well as Dumbledore and the Order but it was too late. Sirius was dead and I blamed myself for his death for so long. This year, it was decided that I'd come to the past in order to discover your weaknesses and use them against you in the future but I never would have dreamed that I'd end up falling head over heels in love with the very man I despise. Well, now you know, Tom. It's in your hands now."

Tom was silent as he digested every single word that Harry had spoken. He didn't have a choice but to believe Harry. There were too many things that Harry knew that Tom hadn't told him. Tom gently reached forward and touched the scar marring Harry's forehead. In the depths of his heart he'd always known he'd had something to do with it. His hand stroked Harry's cheek, sad as Harry tensed. Was he waiting for a blow? A curse? Tom had become what he'd sought to be until Harry had entered his life. He had become immortal, powerful, a Dark Lord but he'd had to forsake so many things to reach that level of evil. If it hadn't been for Harry then he would have never known how to love or how it felt to be loved in return. To know what it was like to be accepted and cherished despite all his wrong doings and misgivings. He'd caused Harry to exist in a living hell and that everyday might have been his last.

"Harry," Tom sighed, kissing Harry's scar gently. "I'm not going anywhere. Not up here," Tom tapped his mind, "Or here," he held his arm over his heart. "I love you and nothing will ever change that. I'm coming with you to your time. I'm going to help you fight. Though, won't I be considered the enemy?"

"You will at first and it's going to take a long damn time for them to accept us. One because they'll just be finding out their Golden Boy is actually gay and two, that he's in a relationship with his sworn enemy. Are you really okay with this or are you just saying you are in order to keep me from freaking out?"

"I'm really okay with this," Tom said, grinning. "You're mine and nothing you or anyone else says is going to change that. Do you understand?"

"I do," Harry smiled, linking hands with Tom and resting his head against Tom's arm. He felt as if the weight of the world had disappeared from his shoulders. He felt light and carefree. He felt more happy then he had since that first night they'd made love.

Okay, that's the end of Chapter Twelve. It's seven pages and it would have been more but I felt it was appropriate to end it at this point. The next chapter will be about them going to Harry's time. I did change the date from 1999 to 2006. Um, yes, Tom's OOC but that's only when it concerns Harry. Oh, and I'm debating on doing a dark Harry turn of events! What're your opinions?

Thank you for being patient. I suppose I just lost interest in writing but I'm back. I intend to finish this story before I move onto finishing my other ones. Don't forget to review, please?

Peace and love!

Shiny Ryuichi Sakuma


	13. Chapter Thirteen

Title: On This Cross

Disclaimers: Not mine! XD

Warnings: If you didn't already know, this is male/male

Notes: I'm extremely surprised I received as many reviews as I did for chapter twelve. To be honest, I thought everyone had forgotten about this story. I'm glad no one did:-) Okay, in light of some confusion; Tom _will_ be able to exist in Harry's time because with Harry traveling to the past he's created a rift in the space/time continuum. He's creating a _new_ future for the world that Tom's in and not affecting his own in any way, shape, or form. Hopefully that clears it up a bit. Oh and about the romance going a bit fast; there is _plenty_ of angst and drama for our two boys to overcome in this chapter and the ongoing ones! Read and Review please

………………

_I hear a voice saying don't be so blind_

_It's telling me the things you'd probably hide_

_Am I your one and only desire?_

_Am I the reason you breathe or am I the reason you cry_

**_-Saliva 'Always'_**

Chapter Thirteen

Bliss seemingly wasn't meant to last for Harry Potter. Romulus made 'the honeymoon's over with' jokes constantly whenever he was positive Tom couldn't hear him. While they were loving when they were alone, Tom was becomingly increasingly obnoxious. He was a natural introvert but his states of isolation were annoying Harry to no end. Often Tom would submerge himself in a dark mood at the drop of a hat and no one would ever sawthose moods coming. Harry was used to just letting Tom have his space until he snapped from whatever had caused his mood fluctuation to begin with. It hurt Harry to know that Tom would probably never be comfortable with their relationship. It was all so new to Tom; the feelings, the protecting of another, the relying on one different from yourself. Harry understood but that didn't mean he had to like it.

Then there was their departure to the Harry's time. Harry patted the pocket the key was in making sure it was still there. It wasn't one of Harry's more pleasant musings. He was nervous, scared, and excited. He knew he'd miss the friends he'd made and he hated not being able to tell them the reason they'd never see him or Tom again. Twelve hours and they'd be leaving. Harry glanced at Romulus making kissy faces at Septimus. He smiled wanly. Yes, there would definitely be a void in his heart where the two had managed to worm their way inside. Perhaps in this time Romulus and Septimus would stay together and adopt children. Who knew? Maybe there was a potion or spell that could allow a man to be pregnant.

The castle was nearly deserted save the few that stayed home for Christmas. Harry was relieved. His and Tom's disappearance wouldn't be viewed by anyone accidentally. Harry's eyes snapped towards the doors of the Great Hall as Tom walked inside. His grin widened. He had finally emerged from his latest funk. Only two hours this time. His face fell as Tom barely acknowledged his existence as he took a seat at the Slytherin table. Every time he tried to speak to Tom regarding his personality disorder, Tom would only freeze and refuse to answer anything. It was horrible.

"Not now," Tom muttered under his breath, meeting Harry's eyes.

"Whatever," Harry muttered. "I can't take this much longer. Second guessing yourself? Or are you doubting me?"

"Quit being stupid," Tom snapped. He glanced to see if anyone was listening in on their conversation. No one was paying the slightest bit of attention. Tom figured no one had even noticed that he and Harry were practically attached at the hip. "I'm not second guessing anything. I've just been thinking about everything you told me about me and about you. I became what I wanted to be. I became the most powerful wizard to have ever lived but now? Who am I? Some poor orphan that has only his appearance and magical knowledge? I'm nothing; just another handsome face in the crowd."

Harry watched the emotions flickering in Tom's beautiful green eyes. He hesitantly clasped his hand with Tom's underneath the table. "I don't want to hurt you, Harry and I think that I'll only give you pain. I don't know if I'll be able to live a life of anonymity. I won't be able to exist with half-blood's and Muggles. I'll never forgive them for what they did to me. I'm sorry but I'm not positive if we should continue this relationship."

"What?" Harry felt his heart tighten in his chest and his stomach to knot. A sense of dread trickled down his spine. This wasn't happening. "Why not? Is there something wrong with _me_?"

Tom glared at him. "I want you to see my point. I abhor humans. I tolerate wizards. That's not going to change. _You're_ not going to change that. My soul's black. I'm on a one way street to the pits of Hell. No amount of repenting and believing is going to turn me into a saint. You want to be with a man that doesn't have a place in your little world of fairy tales and romance? I don't belong in that sort of fiction. You're trying to warp me into an idealistic lover. You're deceiving yourself and placing false hope in me. Don't even deny it," Tom admonished gently. "I'm not who you wish me to be."

"Is this it then?" Harry asked softly, uncurling his fingers from Tom's. His pride wouldn't allow him to cry. "Is this the final scene of our drama?"

"That depends on you. Can you accept me for who I am and who I'm not?"

"I already have. Sometimes I want you to be more understanding of Muggles. I want you to woo me and pamper me but I know that's it's not going to happen. I don't think that you're dark. An evil person can't love and you love me. I know you do because I feel it. I won't ever leave you, Tom, no matter what."

"I won't associate myself with your friends."

"I know. I've always know _that_. It would be something short of a miracle if you did."

"Is it settled?"

"You're stuck with me, _honey_," Harry smirked at Tom's expression. This might prove to be entertaining to tease Tom unmercifully. "What about us Tom? Are we going to announce our relationship to my friends or are we to keep us hidden forever?"

"I need time, Harry."

Harry nodded in understanding. It would take more then a few months for Tom to be comfortable with their relationship. It was new to both of them and with the weeks that would pass by they'd be that more in sync. But what about Voldemort? What would he do once he learned that Tom that was with him? Would he try and recruit the boy he'd once been into serving him? Harry's eyes scanned Tom's blank face as he studied a book. Could Harry convince Tom otherwise? He'd openly admitted to harboring hatred for Muggles and Mudbloods. What would stop him from obeying Voldemort's every word? Harry couldn't disregard the sinking feeling in his heart. He had to have faith in Tom that he wouldn't abandon him.

…………

"Are you nervous?"

Harry feigned a smile but he knew it was pointless. Tom had the impeccable ability to see through all of Harry's charades. "Nervous? Yes. Scared? Yes. Happier then I've ever been? Yes. What about you? Aren't the least bit anxious yourself? This is going to be a tremendous change for you. You're skipping almost fifty years into the future. Also, things aren't like they are here. Hogwart's is full of half-bloods and even a few Muggles that were gifted the ability of magic. I don't wont you going on a rampage and killing everyone in sight."

Tom scoffed. "Those fools aren't worth my effort. Besides, wouldn't I have you to contend with I damage any of your friends?" he asked sourly. "But I am curious. I think it'll be interesting to see what's progressed. Did you tell Romulus and Septimus?"

"No," Harry said, sighing. "What could I possibly have said? They wouldn't have understood. Tom, I'm warning you now. You might be hexed before I even have a chance of telling them what's going on and why I brought you here. Of course, I'll have to lie about the parts concerning us."

"I'm not weak like those maggots."

Harry rolled his eyes. "I never suggested you were." He rested his head against Tom's shoulder. The butterflies in his stomach fluttered in response to Tom wrapping an arm around him. Would these feelings of elation never cease? How had Tom Riddel, of all people, managed to worm his way inside his heart? It was a query that Harry knew would never abate. Then again, the heart had an odd manner of choosing the recipient of love. "I guess we better be leaving."

"I'm waiting on you."

Harry held on tight to Tom and touched the portkey in his pocket. He was expecting the nausea but he hadn't anticipated the pain. His soul felt as if it were being torn in two. He couldn't open his eyes to see if Tom was experiencing the same damage. He didn't have to wonder long as Tom's hand squeezed his and all of Harry's fears were dissolved. Even if things were different, he had the ever steady presence of Tom Riddel at his side.

Only seconds passed and the pain faded. A numbing ache was all that remained. Harry opened his eyes. Something wasn't…right. Dumbledore's office was strangely…sad. The place was empty and lifeless. There wasn't even a single light to beckon him home; almost as if he'd been forgotten. He glanced at the pedestal that Fawkes had rested on and was disturbed to see that the cage _and_ the phoenix were both missing. He swallowed the lump in his throat. His senses were alarmed by the lack of Dumbledore that the office presented. "Tom, I think something horrible's happened," he whispered. "I think Voldemort's attacked the school."

"Duck!" Tom snapped, knocking Harry to the ground as several hexes collided with the wall. Tom's green eyes swirled with crimson as he boldly crouched over Harry's body with his wand poised for action. His eyes narrowed as several wizards approached them. Their eyes widened at Harry before drifting to Tom. He had the curse on his tongue as their attackers aimed their wands at Tom.

"Stop!" Harry yelled, rising to his feet much to Tom's disapproval. He sent Tom a look that clearly said, 'I told you so.' He stood in front of Tom with his arms outstretched. "It's me. I'm back. What's going on? Where's Albus?" He only had to meet Remus Lupin's sorrowful face to have his response. "He's dead?" he breathed, shaking his head. Tears streaked his cheeks before he had a chance to prevent them from falling. "I don't understand. How'd it happen? When? I should have been here."

"You couldn't have done anything to stop it, Harry," Remus gently said, placing a hand on Harry's shoulder. "None of us could've. I'm sorry that you had to return home to these conditions and I'm even more sorry but we have to know what you discovered." Remus's golden eyes landed on the beautiful dark-haired boy that had a striking resemblance to Tom Marvolo Riddel. "And who your friend is."

"Why don't you give him some time in order to mourn the loss of his friend," Tom drawled. He leaned against the desk, arms crossed in front of his chest. "Or are you as stupid as your predecessors? I demand you allow Harry to grieve before interrogating him."

"Then I was right. You _are_ Tom Riddel. _The_ Tom Riddel," one of the wizard's snarled. "I hope you have a damn good reason for bringing him here, Harry. Don't move," Alastor Moody glowered darkly at the green eyed boy. He kept his wand pointed directly at Tom. "Have him under Imperio?"

"I'm not under any spell," Harry said, lowering Moody's wand. "I brought Tom with me because he's probably the only one that can locate the Horcuxes. He'll be able to provide us with information. Quit badgering him. I'm not going to be held responsible if anyone's dismembered for threatening him. Just tell me what happened. How could Voldemort slip into the school without anyone detecting it?"

"Harry, this isn't wise," Minerva intoned. "He is, after all, Tom Riddel. You can't trust him."

"I trust him. Please, lower your wands," Harry pleaded at the three wizards. "He won't harm anyone."

"Unless I'm provoked," Tom said, lazily flickering his gaze towards the older wizards.

"Tom, that isn't helping!" Harry scowled at his lover. He resisted the urge to scold the other boy. More then likely Tom was enjoying the reactions he was receiving. "For now, tell me everything."

Frowning, Remus pocketed his wand. He didn't like this. He didn't like how Harry was looking at Tom and he especially didn't like the possessive gleam in Tom's eyes. There was more to this then Harry insistence that Tom could provide useful information about the Horcuxes. For now, he'd have to keep a watchful eye on Tom. He wouldn't let him harm Harry. "Just do as he says," Remus said to Moody and Minerva. "Harry has a right to know what occurred during his absence. Draco Malfoy was able to infiltrate Hogwarts through the Vanishing Cabinets. He opened a door from Borgin and Burkes to Hogwarts. The Death Eaters were able to easily enter."

"What?" Harry's eyes widened. "Draco Malfoy?" Harry had never thought the other boy could have done anything so…spineless. "What the fuck would he do that for? Malfoy was a bully but he wasn't a coward. Doing something like just seems…below him."

"We believe that Voldemort ordered him to do it and to also kill Albus but Draco didn't do it. He couldn't go through with killing Albus. Snape killed him instead. We don't know where Snape or Draco are. For all we know, Draco could be dead and Snape's kissing Voldemort's robes."  
"Sirius always said that Snape was still on Voldemort's side," Harry spat, melancholy swiftly turning to anger. "But Albus was sure that Snape wasn't a traitor. All these years and Snape was the true snake. Why do you think Malfoy's dead?"

"He didn't finish the order he was given."

Harry sank onto one of the chairs and rested his head in his hands. It wasn't fair. Now that Dumbledore was no longer among the living, who would protect Harry? His eyes flickered to Tom. He knew Tom would. Tom would sacrifice his own life in order to keep Harry out of harm's way. And Draco Malfoy? Was he dead? Was he being tortured? Harry imagined the blond being cursed repeatedly by Voldemort only to be healed so the agony could begin anew. He suppressed the pity he emanated towards Draco. The boy might have been his rival but the fact that he couldn't kill Albus was testament that he wasn't entirely evil despite the Dark Mark that was no doubt emblazoned on his forearm.

Severus Snape. Harry's hands clenched into fists. Sirius had always warned them about trusting so blindly in the former Death Eater but Dumbledore was convinced that Snape was converted to the Light. How incredibly foolish Dumbledore had been. Harry hadn't experienced the amount of hatred he was feeling for Snape in a long, long time. Harry hoped he was the one to meet Snape in combat. He would make damn sure he suffered.

"Harry?"

Harry met Tom's worried gaze. He resisted the urge to melt against Tom and sob until he couldn't cry anymore. There'd be plenty of time for that later. "I'm fine," he said, awarding Tom with a smile that he hoped would tell Tom that he was thankful for his presence. "Is there anything I else I should be aware of?"

"Well…Bill Weasely was injured and he's at Saint Mungo's. There were others that were wounded but no one died. I wish I could bring him back to life. I wish you didn't have to go through all this sadness."

"I can't help but shake the feeling that we're going to lose more of our friends as this war progresses. First my parents, then Cedric, then Sirius, and now Dumbledore. In one way or another they all died trying to protect me from Voldemort. Why couldn't I have been given a normal life? Why couldn't I have just been born to a Muggle family without any knowledge of magic? How many more people will die because of me?" Harry angrily wiped the tears from his face. "If I kill myself then Voldemort should die as well. Voldemort's connected to me. I'm part of him whether I like it or not! Isn't that what the stories say? I have some of his powers. Maybe I'm a Horcux. Maybe"

"That's enough!" Tom hoisted Harry to his feet by his collar. Harry's eyes widened at the anger and hurt dancing in Tom's brilliantly hued scarlet and emerald eyes. "I won't hesitate to issue bodily harm to you. Stay back," Tom growled, glaring at the three wizards cautiously approaching them. "**_I know you're in pain, Harry,_**" Tom whispered in Parseltongue. "**_I'm here. I'm not going to let…him…hurt you. Don't ever speak like that again. Do you understand?"_**

****Harry nodded. **_"I'm sorry. I don't know what to do. I want the killing to end. I don't want to have to bury any of my friends when all this is my fault. Now I've gone and dragged you into this. I shouldn't have let things come this far. I should've returned when I started falling in love with you."_** Harry cursed himself as Tom closed his emotions off. **_"I'm not saying I regret this…us. I just…don't want you to die."_**

**_"You underestimate my powers? Unlike your precious Dumbledore, I won't have the wool pulled over my eyes. Despite your change of heart, I won't abandon you to the wolves. When you've come to your senses come find me,"_** Tom glowered darkly at the other boy before releasing him.

Harry watched Tom storm past McGonagall, Moody, and Remus. His heart ached in his chest. "I want to see Ron and Hermione." Truth be told, he wanted to forget about Tom for the time being. He loved Tom more then he thought could be humanly possible but he didn't want to be the factor that contributed to Tom's death. He couldn't live with himself if Tom was killed. These days, Tom was his only reason for breathing. Even if he lost that fixture in his life, he'd be content knowing that Tom was alive. It seemed that those around him were destined to die a horrific death.

I'm aware this is VERY short. However, before I progress the story, I need opinions from the readers!

There will be no Dark! Harry. I was thinking, you know, Harry's convinced Tom to forego the Dark so it'd be kind of contradictory to have them both go Dark. :-/

Okay, why I need your assistance! Draco Malfoy's going to be playing a huge part in this story. I have a soft spot for the little twit. Should there be a Draco/Tom/Harry love triangle? You see, Harry's going to be distancing himself from Tom because he's afraid of having the other boy's death on his hands. So, I'm kind of leaning towards a love triangle. I just want to know if you'd like to read it! Oh, and should I bring Sirius back to life? I'm considering it. I'd really appreciate your input and I promise that there will not be any more short chapters after this one. :- )

Thanks for all the support!

Peace, Love, and Doughnuts!

Shiny Ryuichi Sakuma!


	14. Chapter 14

Title: On This Cross

Disclaimers: Not mine! XD

Warnings: If you didn't already know, this is male/male

………………

_In the brightest hour of my darkest day,_

_I realize what is wrong with me,_

_Can't get over you, can't get through to you,_

_It's been a helter-skelter romance from the start. _

_Because days come and go but my feelings for you are forever._

_**Papa Roach**_

Chapter Fourteen

Tom felt the urge to just sob like a little child that hadn't been given its way. Harry had hurt him more then anyone ever had, even those bastards that had raped him. More so then even Nevan. At least he hadn't loved Nevan. He'd simply been a means of sexual release for the older boy. But Harry? Tom sighed, watching several students toss snow balls at one another. It had been as if Harry had lodged a knife into his heart and kept it there. He wanted Harry to be with him again. He wanted to see the other boy laugh and mean it.

"Tom Riddle...you're not welcome here," a voice brought Tom from his musings. He turned to see one of the wizards from before standing with a serious expression on his face. Tom had the distinct impression that the man was picking him apart. "However, it would seem that Harry has a deep affinity towards you. I do not understand his reasons behind allowing you to accompany him here. Though, Harry has always been a remarkable boy. He's blinded by pity and compassion. It's one of his downfalls and Voldemort's completely aware of it."

"Is there a point to this?" Tom asked, eyes narrowing at the man.

"What's your ulterior motive?" Remus bluntly asked, watching the flicker of emotions in Tom's green eyes. There was surprise, a flash of anger, and much to Remus's shock; there was a glimmer of a deep-rooted love. Remus wasn't even positive if he'd seen it or imagined it. Had Harry somehow managed to fall in love with Tom Riddle and it was mutual? It was bewildering and though ironically, it was so right.

"I won't listen to you badger me. You can decide what you wish about me. Now, is there anything else you need?" Tom snarled, rising to his feet and glaring at Remus. "Or must you persist on hounding me?"

"I'm done. I just wonder if you'll be by his side when he fights Voldemort or will you find it more to your advantage to join Voldemort's forces?"

Tom quivered with rage as the older wizard left him to his thoughts. How dare the man accuse of him of anything! Harry had been the one to hurt him, not vice-versa! _Yes, but you will. Once you have a taste of power, you'll betray him,_ the snide voice in his head reminded him harshly. "I won't," Tom muttered under his breath, heading back into the castle. But how could he be positive when Harry had made it clear to him that he wanted to end their relationship?

"Are you fucking mental?!" Ron bellowed, blue eyes wide and full of a fury that Harry hadn't expected. "You brought _Tom Riddle_ here? You've allowed the boy that's destined to the most evil wizard in history to come here?! To buddy up with You-Know-Who?!"

"Voldemort. Can't you say his name, Ron?" Hermione frowned, eyes not straying from Harry. "Honestly, you'd think he was Freddie Krueger. Listen, Harry, I understand why you brought Tom with you but I don't think it was the smartest move on your part. How can you be positive that Tom won't find Voldemort? That, instead of one Dark Lord, we'll have two?"

"I'm not asking you to trust him. I'm asking you to trust _me._ Have I ever given you reason to doubt me?"

"No," Hermione sighed, "I just don't like this. Something tells me that Tom has a role to play in this war but I'm not so sure it's for the Light. No, don't look at me like that," she said, raising a finger to touch Harry's lips. "Just listen. Tom Riddle is Lord Voldemort. Nothing you say or do can change that. That means that inside of Tom is the eagerness to dominate, to lie, to manipulate, and most definitely, to kill. Tom won't last very long once Voldemort discovers that he's here. Voldemort will paint a beautiful picture for Tom and Tom will follow. Do you see what I'm trying to say?"

"She's right, Harry. You shouldn't trust him," Ron gave his two cents worth, nodding in agreement with Hermione.

"You're wrong. I trust him with my life."

Herimone's eyes narrowed at the amount of emotion in Harry's voice. Her womanly intuition told him there was much more to this then Harry's insistence that Tom was of sound disposition. "Trust him with your life?!" Ron echoed, getting to his feet. "What's your deal, Harry? What the fuck happened while you were gone? Four months ago, you would've cursed him on the spot! Now you sound like you've went and fallen in love with him!"

"That's enough!" Hermione snapped, glaring at Ron for his lack of tact. "Ron, you need to calm down."

"Whatever," Ron snapped, not looking at either of his friends as he left Hermione's private Head Girl rooms to further vent his frustrations.

"Harry…do you need to tell me anything? Something you might want to get off your chest?"

_You're wasting your time, Mione. There's not a chance in hell that I'm going to tell my secret. Not yet._ "No, Ron's just being an idiot. You've always told me that I should I trust my instincts. They're telling me that Tom's not going to betray me. Okay? There's nothing sinister about this."

"…If you say so," Hermione said, biting her lower lip. Harry wasn't being exactly honest with her and she was determined; add that to her natural curiosity and Harry was in for a challenge.

* * *

"You're not acting like yourself, Harry," Remus said as he watched Harry spear the same piece of sausage for the past ten minutes. "You look horrible. I know that Albus's death is upsetting as well as the state some of your friends are in but it's not the end. What happened while you were gone? Why on earth did you bring Tom Riddle here? I know, it's not my business but if I was Sirius, you'd tell him in a heart beat. Wouldn't you?"

Harry was silent as he pondered Remus's question. Would he tell Sirius about his relationship with Tom? Would Sirius listen unbiased? Or would he immediately tell Harry to cease fraternizing with the enemy even though Tom was the furthest from being Harry's adversary? Would Sirius launch into his own ill fated romance with Remus? Harry raised his eyes from his plate to meet the older man's golden eyes. Did Remus see Sirius die every time he closed his eyes? Did he reminisce on their love? Remus was perhaps the only one that could even begin to understand the tumultuous emotions inside him.

"Does this have anything to do with Tom and why you've been staring at him since you sat down half an hour ago?"

"Walk with me and I'll tell you," Harry said, already getting to his feet. Remus had come to the correct assumption. There was no point in lying to him. "I was sent to the past in order to discover Voldemort's weaknesses. Surprise but he has none. Well, at least until I came along. We fell in love, Remus," Harry said, shocked to hear his voice break and to feel the tears stinging in his eyes. Why was he upset? He'd done what he had to in order to ensure Tom's survival.

_Admission. You're a brave, young man. _Remus quietly waited for Harry to continue, knowing how utterly difficult it must be. Remus couldn't say he was astonished by Harry's sexual preference or that the boy he'd chosen to love was the very man he hated. Yet, Harry's love for Tom Riddle was genuine and honest. He could see it in Harry's eyes and he could see it being reflected in Tom's.

"But I can't have his blood on my hands. He'd give his life for me and I don't want that to happen. I don't want him to die because he had the misfortune to fall in love with me. That's why I have to push him away. I have to make him see that being with me will only lead to his death. He doesn't think it will but I know it. I love him and it's killing me to hurt him," Harry sighed, ignoring the tears that streaked his face. "But I'm doing what's right."

"This isn't right, Harry," Remus said, wiping one of the tear drops from Harry's cheek. "You love. That is the most important gift and also the most important weapon against Voldemort. Your love will keep you strong and you'll have a reason to keep fighting no matter how dismal the future might be. You'll have someone to protect and that'll be your greatest support. Pushing Tom away isn't going to do you any good because whether you like it or not, Tom's going to be there. He's going to find a method to being by your side through every battle, every hardship, and every heart break. Yes, he might die but do you think he hasn't prepared himself for that? Have you given thought as to how _he_ feels? Any day now and you could be facing Voldemort. Tom might lose _you_. One day, you'll look back on this and wonder how you could have ever been so stupid."

"Why do you trust him?"

"He reminds me of you," Remus simply stated. "And because I don't want what happened to me and Sirius to be your fate as well. You never heard the actual story about Sirius and I. Yes, we loved one another infinitely and we were completely devoted. Then I made my biggest mistake. I didn't trust him when he said that he had misgivings towards Peter and then when Lily and James were murdered, I believed Peter. I said and did horrible things to Sirius, Harry. Then, he miraculously escaped Azkaban but we never actually spoke about our past. Part of me feels that if I had believed Sirius that he may have never been in Azkaban. We could have run away together. Harry, not a day goes by that I don't regret my mistakes. I hate myself for turning my back on my best friend and the only man I've ever loved."

"I'd always thought you and Sirius had a fairy tale love story," Harry remarked, sitting on one of the stairs of the Astronomy Tower. "I can't do it. I can't get him involved in this war. It isn't his to fight."

"You knew this fight would become his once you brought him with you," Remus scolded softly. "You can't lie to me. I was friends with your father and Sirius. Those two couldn't keep anything hidden from me. You don't have a chance. I think, deep down, you're terrified that Tom's going to betray you to Voldemort."

"…Yeah, part of me is," Harry acknowledged, holding his head in his hands. "Hermione made a point. Tom is Voldemort. I can't escape that fact no matter how much I want to. Somewhere in Tom is the Dark Lord."

"Maybe but Tom chose you, didn't he? He could have stayed behind. I think when the time's right Tom will decide his own fate. You just need to believe in him as much as you want us to. Well, I have to meet with the Order. Just…keep what I said in mind."

Harry didn't move for a long time after Remus departed the tower. His heart desperately wanted him to ignore the warnings. His heart wanted him to love Tom. His intuition told him that Tom wasn't to be trusted. How could he possibly make a decision when he was at war with himself?

* * *

Tom felt heated stares boring into his back as he idly stared into the flickering flames of the fireplace of the Gryffindor Common Room. His keen hearing caught snippets of whispered conversation. People were curious as to who he was. Was he an exchange student? A refuge? A spy? An ex-Death Eater? He kept his sneer to himself as he wondered how they would react to discovering that he was in fact their Golden Boy's lover as well as Tom Marvolo Riddle. The thought of Harry shifted his train of thought.

What was he to Harry? Not so long ago Tom had been pondering what Harry was to him. Harry loved him. Their bond was enough for Tom to not doubt that. If it wasn't the problem of not being in love any longer, then why had Harry decided to distance himself? Did Harry honestly expect him to believe his bullshit excuse? Tom was more then capable of taking care of himself _and_ Harry.

"You're Tom Riddle, aren't you?"

Tom glanced from the hearth towards a young woman. "Who wants to know?"

The girl sat beside him. Tom raised a dark brow at the girl's impudence. His green eyes met her hazel ones and for several seconds they didn't speak. Tom knew he was being scrutinized underneath her gaze. Would she be satisfied with her findings? Would she be terrified of the darkness inside him? Would she judge him based on his name? "He's my best friend," she spoke, surprising him with her words. "He has his reasons for deciding to bring you here, I suppose. I only hope that he hasn't made a horrible mistake."

"He hasn't," Tom said quietly. "I had nothing until I met him. He's taught me that there are more important things to life then being the greatest, then hatred, then revenge. Why? Do you think I'm going to betray him?" Tom mirthlessly chuckled. "You wouldn't be the first and once everyone comes to discover my identity, you won't be the last."

"I'm not sure what to make of you," she said, smiling slightly. "I'm Hermione Granger, by the way. I'm sorry. I'm usually more loquacious then this. Just, I'm confused as to why you decided to come here."

"You mean my ulterior motives?"

"Something like that." Hermione blushed. "Harry must have told you about his story and about Voldemort's, well, yours. I find it interesting that you would sacrifice your ambitions in order to follow a complete stranger to his time. You knew that you would become the darkest lord the world has ever known and yet you abandoned your dreams. I know it isn't my place to pry into your business but all the accounts about Tom Riddle aren't pleasant. It seems almost impossible that Harry convinced you in three months to forego all you'd ever known."

"Does it matter? He's adamant that I remain on the sidelines while he fights," Tom scowled. "I'm to be a spectator. Do you fight beside of him?"

"…Yes."

"Then why am I different?" Tom inquired, pinching the bridge of his nose, feeling an oncoming headache. "Why will he risk his best friend's life and not mine? Well, if you can answer that then you'd have to be a genius."

"He cares about you," Hermione stated, venturing onto a dangerous path with her inquisitiveness. She knew that Tom Riddle could transfigure her into a teacup if that was his wish. Instead of a curse, Hermione was vexed to see a certain amount of amazement intermingled with a flash of pain dance in his clear, green eyes. "I think he cares about you more then he's willing to admit."

"He's my friend and it's because of his friendship that I'm here," Tom quickly responded, knowing that she could effortlessly sense any sort of deceit. Women were perceptive. "What are you implying, Miss Granger?"

"Nothing," she smoothly retorted. "I was only making an assumption. Oh! Harry! There are you are! Ron's been looking for you. I think he wants to apologize," Hermione called, waving at the raven haired youth. "He's been at the Owlery for a while. He's been writing a letter to send Molly and Arthur. I've met Tom. Why didn't you introduce us?"

"For the obvious reasons, Hermione," Harry rolled his eyes, not daring to look at Tom. He knew he'd break his composure if he did. "And from how you reacted when I did tell you, I wasn't going to hold my breath for you to get used to the idea of having him around."

"Yes and I apologize for that. He's actually quite pleasant. I'll find Ron."

"Wait, Hermione…" Harry cursed as she disappeared through the tunnel. Now he was alone with Tom; he'd wanted to prevent this until he'd had enough time to come to terms with himself and the exact meaning of their relationship. "What do you think about my time? I know it's different. I mean, you were talking to a Muggle."

"Why am I not surprised that the only intelligent being in this school is a Muggle?" Tom rolled his eyes. "Aside from you but then again, you're a Mudblood. Why are you doing this to me? To us? I understand your precautions. Hell, I even understand that you think I'm going to ally myself with Voldemort. Why shouldn't I? After, that's who I would have become except for you constant meddling."

"Am I Scooby-Doo?" Harry wondered aloud, earning an adorably confused look from Tom. "Nothing. It's a Muggle cartoon. I don't want to talk about this right now."

"Please," Tom sighed, reaching forward to take Harry's hand only for Harry to move aside. "Fine. If you want to throw away everything we've shared then so fucking be it. I'm not going to wait forever on you. I would have expected this from someone else but not you. Not with all your promises and love declarations. You made me believe something that was false. Is this all a joke to you? I don't even want you to answer that. I don't think my heart could take it."

"Tom, I..."

"Shut the fuck up and leave me alone."

Harry was taken aback by the fierceness in Tom's voice. Realization dawned on Harry that he had truly and irrevocably hurt Tom. Harry hastily retreated to his room. He didn't want the world to see him weep.

Harry eyes didn't stray from Tom throughout breakfast. Any wandering gaze that landed on Tom immediately caused Harry's jealously to flare. Tom was receiving all sorts of attention from the other students, especially the girls. Tom explained his presence with calculated ease. He was merely an exchange student from another school whose parents wanted him at Hogwarts in order for him to be protected. Everyone bought the excuse. Well, everyone but Ginny who had instantly recognized Tom as the boy from the diary. Hermione had hastily taken Ginny aside before she hexed Tom and enlightened Ginny on the severity of the situation. Ginny was currently sitting in stony silence alternatively glaring at Harry and Tom.

Ron was brooding much like his sister. Only he was making his disdain of Tom perfectly clear. Harry was waiting on Tom to curse Ron. Harry knew how short Tom's temper was and Harry knew how emotional Ron could become. Hermione was the medium. She was soothing pacifying words to Ron and berating Ginny. Harry wondered where her need to be in the middle originated from. Had she already guessed the emotional attachment between him and Tom? Harry wouldn't have been stunned. Hermione had the knack of seeing through all charades.

Harry resisted the urge to wring Lavendar's throat as she flirted uproariously with Tom. Harry felt his heart clench tightly in his chest as Tom flashed her one of his crooked smiles that he always reserved specifically for Harry. "You didn't take my advice, did you, Harry? He isn't a school girl with her first crush. He isn't going to be there forever," Remus intoned from beside Harry.

"That doesn't mean it hurts any less," Harry responded. "Is something wrong?"

"Tom has to be sorted into a House and he needs a schedule. If we're to continue the lie that Tom's an exchange student then he has to pretend to be a student. Would you mind telling him?"

Harry inwardly chuckled as interrupted Lavendar's conversation. "Tom, we have to sort you into a House and Remus has your schedule. That is, if you can tear yourself away from _her_."

"Oh, I'll talk to you later, Tom. I'm sure I'll be able to find you!" Lavendar said, fluttering her eyelashes at Tom before turning to gossip with her friends.

"**_Jealous?_**" Tom hissed, following Harry towards the doors of the Great Hall where Remus was waiting. "It's a given I'll be sorted into Slytherin. After all, I am Salazzar Slytherin's heir."

"Which could be potentially problematic," Remus said, sensing the animosity between the two young men. "If anyone in Slytherin mentions you then it's quite possible that the Death Eater's and Voldemort will be able to discover your identity. If Voldemort knows you're here then I can only begin to imagine the plans he'll start to make involving you."

"And I'm not going to him!" Tom snapped, green eyes flashing scarlet. "How many times do I have to repeat myself? You seem like an intelligent being. I am not betraying Harry. I wish you both would realize that."

"I do Tom it's just..."

"Just what?! I knew what was going to happen when I came here, Harry. I knew I was placing my life in danger. I still know it. I decided when you told me the truth that I wouldn't abandon you. I'm not going to now or ever. I would give my life for you, Harry and I know you would do the same. That's what people" Tom abruptly stopped talking, glancing at Remus.

"He already knows," Harry said softly.

Remus sighed, watching the war escalating between Harry and Tom. "Even a blind fool could see the love between you. Harry Potter and Tom Riddle. Will wonders never cease? Harry, I've already given you my take on this. You're being an idiot. He's Tom Riddle, not Neville Longbottom. He's a wizard of phenomenal proportions. At his age, he's already mastered more magic then men my age. If anything, he'll be a powerful ally, even if you refuse to reconcile."

"I need some time to think about this. Try and be in Gryffindor," Harry said, pivoting on his heel and walking in the opposite direction.

"He's always been led by his emotions," Remus remarked as they ascended the stairs to the Headmistress's office. "He loves you and trusts you but I don't think he trusts himself. He's had loved ones die before. I just never knew he blamed himself for Sirius's death."

"Was Sirius your lover?"

Remus smiled wanly. "He was. I was stupid, much like Harry. I allowed the best thing to have ever happened to me slip between my fingers. When I finally saw him again it was a short reunion. He was killed two years afterwards by his own cousin. Harry's like a son to me. I don't want his trepidation to be the cause for him to lose you."

Tom sat beneath the Sorting Hat as he processed Remus's words. Why couldn't Harry stop living in the past? _I want to be with Harry. I want to be in Gryffindor. I have to protect him from not just Voldemort but from himself and his demons._

_Ah, Tom Riddle Junior. You are very different from the Tom Riddle I recall from years ago. Your heart is no longer clouded by the darkness of your soul though your soul is still quite far from being pure. You would do well in Gryffindor. You are brave, loyal, and yet you are ambitious and spiteful. Slytherin has always been your place. You want Gryffindor. So be it. _"Gryffindor!"

…

The end of chapter fourteen, kitties! Remus is their ally and some how he's morphed into the patron saint of misfortunate lovers. Well, Hermione has a general idea as to what's going on between Tom and Harry. Oh, right. These past several chapters have been fillers leading up to the Draco scenes and Voldemort scenes. They've basically been establishing Harry and Tom's rocky relationship and that it _could_ break at any given moment. Tom is quite firm in his feelings for Harry but Harry isn't so sure anymore. I mean, he loves Tom, don't get me wrong but he feels it's his responsibility to keep Tom safe at all costs, even losing the man he loves in the process.

Well, please stay tuned in for chapter fifteen: - ) And please review!!

Peace, Love, and Doughnuts!

_Shiny Ryuichi Sakuma_!! XD


	15. Chapter Fifteen

Title: On This Cross

Disclaimer: Not mine

Warnings: Male x Male

_Where have all the good men gone and where are all the gods?_

_Where's the street wise Hercules to fight the rising odds?_

_Isn't there a white knight upon a fiery steed?_

_Late at night I toss and turn and I dream of what I need._

_I need a hero_

_I'm holding on for a hero till the end of night._

_**-Bonnie Tyler**_

Chapter Fifteen

Tom Riddle, just several months ago, would have found being in Gryffindor to be completely hilarious and not to mention preposterous. Now, he was following his begrudging ally, Hermione, towards the Gryffindor Tower. Hell, even his robes were Gryffindor colors. Soon enough he'd be cheering and bouncing p\om-poms in the air. "Have you ever read any Muggle literature, Tom?"

Hermione's query snapped Tom to attention. "Yes. In the orphanage there were books. No one ever read them but me. Another oddity that I had. Another quirk that the other children despised; my intelligence. Once they realized I was a wizard…well…you do the math. Why do you ask?"

Hermione laughed. "I'm just making conversation. You were an outcast, weren't you?" Her hazel eyes softened as their gazes met. She wasn't surprised that his green eyes were cold and shadowed. Harry was probably the only one that had ever seen the 'real' Tom Riddle hidden underneath all the aloofness. "You don't have to answer me. I've read enough about your early history."

"Apparently I'm the bogey of nightmares. I've been given a detailed history of my past…future. It's still confusing."

"It's understandable. Skittles," Hermione said to the Fat Lady. "I have to do homework. Harry should be around here somewhere. He's probably playing chess with Ron. When you're ready, I'll take you the room that Remus found for you. You'll be by yourself for obvious reasons."

Tom ignored the stares in his direction as his eyes scanned the Common Room for Harry. His heart sank when he couldn't find the familiar pair of jade eyes or the disheveled black hair. "Oh Tom! I thought I'd find you here! Isn't that great that you're in Gryffindor?" Tom turned to see Lavender walking towards him with her posse of girlfriends.

"Thrilling," he gritted through clenched teeth. "I have to unpack. Do you mind?"

"Of course not!"

Tom rolled his eyes as he bolted to the stairs, thankful that he'd escaped from the irritating girl and her annoying flirtatious advances. He shouldn't have even spoken with her in the first place. Now she had the warped idea that Tom was a love interest. Perhaps he should enlighten her to the fact that he wasn't attracted to the female gender. Then again, that might cause her to hound him more ferociously in an attempt to convert him back to heterosexuality. It would make for a decent laugh but in the end the migraines wouldn't be worth it.

"I see you're in Gryffindor. I'm glad," came a tired voice from one of the dormitories.

"You wanted me to be here so I am," Tom said, noting the dark circles underneath the other boy's eyes. Hell, even his skin was pale. "You didn't sleep last night," he stated, desperately wanting to take Harry into his arms and tell him everything would be alright. "It won't help matters."

"I know. Everything's happened so fast. Albus died and if I had been here I might have been able to prevent it. I could have been by his side. There was still so much I wanted to learn from him. Then, there's you. I…don't know what to do about you. I love you. I do. I don't want you to get hurt or killed. I'd blame myself."

"You can't blame yourself. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. I'll be there for you. Stop doing this to us. To yourself." Tom gently cupped Harry's chin in his hand. "I'd do anything for you."

"That's why this hurts," Harry's voice broke as his eyes filled with tears. "I don't know what to do."

"What does your heart want you to do, Harry?" Tom asked, tenderly wiping the tear drops from the boy's face. The pain that Tom felt at seeing his lover fall apart was the worst he'd ever experienced. He never would have imagined that one, single boy could do this to him; to cause him to feel the one emotion he'd always abhorred with every fiber of his being. Love. It was Fate that had manipulated their paths to meet. Tom had to admit that Fate had gambled on them but in the end had dealt a winning hand. Tom hadn't always believed in Fate. That was because of Harry as well.

"I want to love you until we're old and gray and withered. I want to rock beside you in creaky chairs with dust underneath our feet. I want to adopt children and have a family. I want everything that months ago I wouldn't have even imagined. I can't see anything else in my life, Tom. We have a connection that we can't deny. We _couldn't_ deny it even in the beginning," Harry said, sighing. "I think that's why I want to be by myself. If you died…I wouldn't know how to live. We've been consumed with each other."

"I'm not going to die. I'm Tom Riddle. I'm one of the strongest wizards to have ever lived. Why do I have to keep repeating myself?" Tom dried the rest of the strewn tears from Harry's cheeks with his fingers. "We're miserable without each other."

"We can talk about this in your room. I don't want everyone knowing about us," Harry said, shrugging. "I doubt anyone would even pay attention to us. Except your fan club." Harry made a face.

"That's not funny," Tom said dryly, following Harry as they ascended the stairs. "She's hopelessly idealistic if she even dreams I may return her affections. Should I tell her I prefer men, specifically men with dark hair and enchanting green eyes?"

"Only if you want her to try harder."

"I figured that the harder the chase, the more stubborn she'd be. She's kind of reminiscent of a leech. This is my bedroom? I'm impressed that Remus went to such lengths," Tom commented as he passed through the door of new home. "Slytherin colors. I'm delighted. If I must be in these atrocious robes all day then I might as well at least have some sense of sanity while I'm relaxing. We're alone. Anything else you want to do…talk about?" Tom smirked, green eyes flaring red as he predatorily approached Harry.

"Tom…I still have to work out some personal things before we…get into that again."

"That's fine. So, talk." Tom sank onto his bed and kicked of his shoes. "Or do I have to initiate it?"

"I _am_ miserable, Tom. I can't sleep. I can't eat. I can't even concentrate on my studies," Harry said, sitting beside Tom. "Do you honestly forgive me for being selfish and inconsiderate and"

"A total twit?" Tom finished, grinning widely. "I was never mad to begin with. I was hurt but not angry. I forgave you when it happened. You know, sometimes I wish you _hadn't_ come into my life and disrupted it. At least then I wouldn't have known what love feels like and I wouldn't have known someone like you existed out there."

"You mean it?"  
"Do I have to spell it for you?" Tom teased, wrapping his arms around Harry. "Don't ever do that again, moron."

_I can't promise that but for now, I'm going to enjoy this. I'm going to be selfish and choose living my life for myself and not everyone else even if that means being ousted as a traitor once everyone discovers my relationship with Tom Riddle. At least I'm being true to myself and that's the most important thing_.

…

"We must call the Order together, Remus. Everyone must be made aware that Tom Riddle is at Hogwarts. Everyone must be on their guard in case he betrays us to Voldemort," Minerva said, pacing the floor of her office. "I understand the reason Albus sent Harry to the past but I doubt Albus meant for Harry to bring him here. What do we do? He's powerful, too powerful to be allowed to roam free. He must be kept in check."

"I hardly think that's necessary," Remus remarked, voice full of exhaustion. "Minerva, I don't think Tom's a threat to us. Harry's influence has been positive for Tom. He's been shown how to _feel_. I won't divulge you of all the details but I trust Tom not to deceive Harry. I'm not omnipotent but I have a sixth sense that Tom's going to be the turning point of this war."

"Has anyone even spoken to Riddle about his role?" Moody queried, leaning against one of the pillars, arms crossed in front of his chest. "It sounds like you want to _use_ Riddle for our benefit."

"You can call it what you will. Tom will fight for the Light. However, I don't think we should inform the Order, or anyone for that matter, about Tom's true identity. No one will trust him. If anything, they'll want to harm him and any harm that comes to Tom means we lose Harry. Tom will be our secret weapon."

"You think that wise? To foolishly place your trust in a known murderer?"

"I see us with little choice, Minerva. As of right now, we're losing the war. Albus has been killed. Snape's a traitor. We're losing students and their families with every passing day as the terror escalates. Soon…we won't have anyone_ but_ the Order and we can't fight the Death Eaters and Voldemort alone."

"…I agree with you," Minerva said, looking all the worst for someone that had just committed a blunder. "Riddle could be our only hope."

"Then it's decided. We keep this between us. Do we launch an offensive or wait to defend against an attack?" Moody asked, electric blue eye rolling towards the doors of the office. "It would seem we're not alone."

"Headmistress! Draco Malfoy's been found!" Tonks shouted, running into the office and nearly colliding with one of the chairs sporadically placed near the desk. "He's half dead but alive! What are your orders?"

"Draco Malfoy?" Minerva repeated, face pale and drawn. "My goodness. I didn't except for him to survive after his mistake. Half-dead? What do you mean and how did you come across this knowledge?"

Tonks steadied her breathing and accepted a glass of water with gratitude from Moody. Three sets of eyes were focused on her. "We were informed not five minutes ago by one of our posts in Ireland. A local girl found Draco nearly dead in one of the forests near her village. One of our wizards recognized Draco and has since been doing his best to heal him with the limited medical facilities that the village offers. He's been tortured, beaten, and quite possibly raped."

"Have them bring Draco here immediately. We can treat him here at Hogwarts."

"Why not Mungo's, Remus?"

"There's a risk that someone might finish what was started. At least at Hogwarts he has a fighting chance."

"You would assist the enemy? It's because of him that Dumbledore's dead," Moody sneered. "You can play nursemaid to the spoiled brat all you want. I'm not going to lay a fucking hand on him in sympathy. He brought this on himself."

"Well don't sit there, Nymphadora. You have work to do."

Remus wearily sighed as the young woman hastily left the office through the fireplace. Part of him sided with Alistair. Why should he care for the boy that had caused so much sadness? The rest of him knew that Draco could repent for his sins. Remus wanly smiled. Just like Tom Riddle who found his heart with Harry Potter.

…

Harry was the first to notice how incredibly secretive Remus was being and Harry had been around the werewolf long enough to knew when Remus was keeping something important from him. Harry despised not being in the know all of things concerning Hogwarts because quite honestly, it always involved him. So, Harry wasn't surprised to see Remus avert his gaze from Harry as the younger man walked into his office after class. "Okay, spill it, Remus. What are you hiding from me?"

"Nothing," Remus replied nonchalantly. "I have to discuss"

"I don't care what you have to discuss. What's going on?"

"…The Order's located Draco Malfoy. He's alive."

"What?"

"But he might not make it. They arrived with him only a few hours ago. Madame Pomfrey's been using every spell and remedy she knows in order to heal him. It doesn't look good."

"…What…what happened to him?"

"He was tortured. That's evident from all the bruising and gashes. Even his Dark Mark's been mutilated. They nearly severed his forearm. Several broken ribs, a crushed lung, his face is a bloody mess, his femur was snapped in two, and that's not all," Remus said, eyes darkening at the sheer magnitude of violence that Draco had been subjected to. "We found evidence of rape. If anything his rape was an act of degradation. I don't see how he survived."

"You know, I shouldn't pity him but I do."  
"He chose his path, Harry," Tom said, walking towards them. "Don't pity him. So…I could have been that man. I was supposed to become him if not for your constant nosiness but I'm oddly grateful to you. You've opened my eyes to reality but I still hate them. I just don't yearn for their massive genocide."

"Oh, lovely," Harry quipped sarcastically. "I'm so proud of myself."

"You should be. Because of you, we have a powerful ally," Remus interjected, golden eyes dwelling on the young wizard. "Tom…are you going to fight for the Light? Will you be on our side or are you a free agent?"  
"I fight with Harry. Why? Do you have plans involving me to bring about the demise of the Dark?"

"Yes. I want to attack them but to do that, we're going to require your assistance."

"…Am I pawn?" Tom asked coldly.

"No," Remus said, shaking his head. "We're losing this war, Tom. Every day they grow stronger and we lose ranks of wizards and witches that want to be neutral. In the end, we don't stand a chance against them. But with you?" Remus shrugged a shoulder. "We might gain the upper hand and bring hope to the defenders of the Light."

"You're risking his life!" Harry snapped, glaring angrily at Remus. "I'm not going to let you do that."

"It's my decision, Harry. I agree to fight with you. Let me know the time and place and I'll be there."

Harry pursed his lips as Tom pivoted on his heel and left the room. "You can't have your cake and eat it too, as the saying goes, Harry. Tom knows what he's doing. Trust _him_ like he trusts you." Harry stalked from the older man's office, leaving Remus to sigh in frustration. He'd forgotten how incredibly annoying young love could be.

…

_Finally, I updated . I was wary about this chapter as I feel it's not my best. Actually, it was quite boring. I'm just glad I've already wrote most of chapter sixteen. . Well, they're back together. Isn't that lovely? _

_I love you all, especially those that started reading this story three years ago! Hopefully this one will be finished by the end of the year. Heh heh. _

_Peace, Love, and Doughnuts!_

_Shiny Ryuichi Sakuma! Shiny, Shiny!_


	16. Chapter 16

Title: On This Cross

Fee Fi Fo Fum, I smell the blood of a disclaimer. Not mine XD

Warnings: This is a boy love story. If gayness squicks you then why are you on chapter 16?

Notes: Steadily progressing towards the end. I'm estimating a grand total of 25 chapters. Almost over with: - D Yay. And it's definitely AU now that HPatDH has been released.

_Always, I will remain near only you_

_From when I held you in my arms_

_From when I noticed the signs_

_Always, only I..._

_Because I can't let go of you_

_Because I'll absolutely protect you_

_**Gackt- Kimi no tame ni dekiru Koto**_

Chapter Sixteen

Tom knew that he shouldn't be here. He hadn't even meant to steal Harry's Invisibility Cloak. He'd meant to ask permission first but Harry was otherwise distracted with a game of Wizard Chess. Tom had enveloped himself in the gossamer material and headed towards the Headmistress's Office to wait until McGonagall emerged and he could trail her towards the location they were hiding Draco Malfoy. He needn't have lingered long. He followed her towards a restricted section of the castle that was wrought with wards of warning to those that decided to try and unravel the delicate weavings of magic. The spiral stair case seemed to have gone on for miles until they finally entered a converted dungeon.

He'd been immensely curious as to the identity of several of the patients being treated for different maladies but he didn't have time to ponder as McGonagall walked into a secluded room that might have served as a torture chamber at some point in time. So, here he was, standing beside of a boy that he was unfamiliar with but felt as if he were a kindred spirit that could relate to him in one way or another.

The boy's pale blonde locks fanned the goose feathered pillow beneath him. His eyes were closed, his dark lashes offsetting the light hue of his hair. There were several bruises marring his porcelain complexion. His swollen lip and busted nose struck a fire of anger deep within Tom's soul. It was almost as if someone had taken pleasure in spoiling the boy's perfect appearance. Tom's eyes drifted from the young man's face. One of his arms was completely bandaged from wrist to elbow. Blood stained the white cloth. His chest was wrapped in gauze. His right leg was in a cast. There were enough bruises to send Tom's rage to a boiling madness that he didn't understand.

"How is he, Poppy?"

Tom raised his eyes to look at the weary woman. Had she been on constant vigilance? "He's alive and will live a long life yet. He's remarkably strong willed for someone that's suffered so much. There are spells on him that are preventing me from administering medicine to him magically. I have to heal him as if he were a Muggle."

"Have you tried removing the spells?"

"Yes but to no avail. I'm not powerful enough."

McGonagall sighed. "I know I should hate him but he's just a _boy_. A boy that was caught in this entire mess now he must pay the consequences. He and Harry are like mirrors even if neither are unwilling to admit to it. You need to eat, Poppy. He'll be fine for a little while on his own."

"Oh, I hope you're right," Pomfrey said, not wanting to leave her charge even for a second should his condition alter.

Tom's eyes followed the two women as they left the room, the door clicking softly behind them. "You weren't supposed to survive," Tom said, hand gently tucking a few wisps of hair behind Draco's ear. "But you did. Is that a testament to your strength or a fault in Voldemort's plans? You might have been the next Dark Lord had you finished your task assigned to you but you were consumed with human emotion. _Muggle_ emotion. I wonder if that was the real reason he decided to do this to you? The power to inflict this much damage and not care about the outcome must be…intoxicating. The ability to destroy. No wonder I went evil. It's easier."

Tom sat there beside of Draco until Poppy returned. He sat there and contemplated his life and the turn of events that had been brought on by Harry Potter. He thought about Draco and the fear he must have felt once he'd been brought before Voldemort to accept his punishment. He thought about the thin line between darkness and light and how it was effortless to cross from one into the other without even realizing it sometimes. He thought about how he could have been great and powerful but then there were so many sacrifices to make in order to reach infamy. His confused soul was troubled enough without the added burden of second guessing his future. Even though he was Tom Riddle, he was still a seventeen year old boy.

….

"What's wrong with you today? You're being…well…you're not being yourself. You're acting like the old you," Harry said, caressing Tom's back gently. "You need to stop keeping everything inside. I thought we already went through this once."

"We did. I'm fine," Tom replied, not looking at his lover.

Harry kept his sigh to himself _and_ his plaguing thoughts of Tom's mental stability. Ever since…last night he'd been so…strange, so engrossed with _something_ that Harry couldn't name. There was a doubt creeping into Harry's heart that warned him that he hadn't seen the end of the darkness inside of Tom. It terrified him that perhaps the evil hadn't been truly defeated and instead it was lying in wait for the perfect moment to snap Tom's already delicate mind.

"You don't believe me," Tom accused in that whisper soft tone of his that sent chills through Harry's body. It reminded Harry of a snake that was about to strike. Those evergreen eyes that melted Harry's heart rose from staring into a void to narrow into a glower. Harry felt trapped as Tom glared at him. "Have you _ever_ trusted me, Harry?"

Harry felt his resolve crumble as he slowly inched away from Tom but he knew he had nowhere to go. The Astronomy Tower was the ideal place for those that didn't want to be discovered. Harry's heart pounded wildly in his chest as he backed into the stone rampart behind him. Tom wouldn't hurt him. He couldn't. He'd given his promise but was it meaningful coming from a soul as black and tainted as Tom Riddle's? Cold sweat formed on his brow. His hand reached for his wand in his pocket but the smooth feel of wood on his hand prevented him from doing so. He locked eyes with Tom. "What game are you playing?"

"Game? I'm not playing a game. You're the one going for your wand. Why are you afraid of me all of a sudden?" Tom queried, stroking Harry's hand with his wand. "What are you thinking about?"

The voice was laughing. Eyes were the color of blood. Harry couldn't see, he couldn't hear. His heart was painfully beating in his chest until Harry felt it would explode from the magnitude of pressure. The boy Harry desperately loved was Lord Voldemort. He was no longer Tom Riddle. The dashing good looks of his younger years had faded until there was nothing but a shell of his former self remaining. Those nights of love making and those days of gaiety were no more. They were an illusion sent to goad Harry into a false sense of security, to deliver him into the hands of Voldemort.

"Harry! Stop it! It's me!"

Harry couldn't breathe. Had it all been just a wonderful dream because there was no chance in this life or the next that Tom Riddle would forego his plans of world domination in order to be with a boy like Harry Potter; a boy that was only known because of his mother's love for him, a boy that had survived on luck for the better part of his life, a boy that had wanted to be loved by someone that didn't expect something in return. A love that was unconditional.

A throbbing pain shot through Harry. Bit by bit his eyes focused on the face in front of him. Was that worry for him? Beautiful green eyes were wide with concern and Harry couldn't remember a time when someone had been so open with him. Long, black hair framed a handsome face. Harry's heart gradually returned a normal pace. "Harry? Are you alright? It's me. It's Tom."

Harry's eyes filled with tears as wrapped his arms around Tom tightly and buried his head into the warmth of the other boy's chest. "Harry? Honey, I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong."

"I thought…I thought you were Voldemort and that everything had been a dream," he mumbled against Tom. "You've been odd and it seems as if you reverted to your old self. That the Tom I love is gone."

Tom's guilt heightened as he held Harry firmly against him. Harry's sobs were like knives being lodged in his soul. The quaking of the Harry's body as he succumbed to the intensity of his emotions overwhelmed Tom with the need to care for the boy for as long as he was alive. _I couldn't save you from your worst enemy; yourself_, Tom thought, swallowing the lump that had formed in his throat. He desperately wanted to cry but his resolve and pride were too strong to compete with the sadness lingering inside of him.

He'd never wanted these feelings. With every passing day it seemed Tom learned to be more compassionate and caring, especially towards Harry. His remorse for having caused Harry any amount of pain was enough to tell Tom that he was changing. Months ago he would have told the first person to ask that his goal in life was to dominate all. Now? He wanted to spend the rest of his life with the young man his heart had stubbornly chosen to be his, even if his mind had been against it.

In the beginning, Tom had realized he was attracted to Harry. Who wouldn't have been? A tall, muscular youth with chiseled muscles and a face that an angel couldn't contend with. At a pace that had alarmed Tom thoroughly, he'd discovered he was just as captivated with Harry's personality as he was to his physical attributes. It had taken more time for Tom to admit that he was rapidly falling head over heels in love with Harry Potter. It had been the first time for him and he'd been angry and terrified at the same time. That first fleeting kiss had caused all sorts of reactions in Tom that he'd never experienced before. The shy touches had been endearing; even if he'd been a hesitant. Then…those heated escapades of exploration that _still_ set him on fire at the mere memory.

Tom gently cupped Harry's chin in his hand. The tears had finally subsided. "Harry. You don't have anything to worry about. I'm not leaving you."

Harry nodded, hearing that voice that he cherished above all else. The voice that he was used to obeying, that provided Harry with the reassurance he needed. "I'm just a little on edge. I keep thinking that this _is_ going to end, any day now. I thought…well…it might have been my imagination."

"That's right."

"…After Remus practically volunteered you to fight for us, I've been scared."

"Scared? Harry…I might not be the same Tom Riddle that is Voldemort's past but that doesn't mean I'm weak. I haven't lost any of my strength and if anything, I'm more powerful because I have something that's worth fighting for and _living_ for."

Without caring that they might be caught, Harry pressed his lips against Tom's roughly, sending them both sprawling onto the ground. Seconds, minutes passed and neither broke apart from the passionate hold. It was just the two of them and nothing else mattered but the connection that existed between them. Harry _needed_ to be close to Tom, to feel every inch of his body, to know that he wasn't alone.

"Harry?!!!" a shriek sent both Tom and Harry quickly away from each other.

* * *

Yes an evil cliffhanger. I felt this was a nice place to end it. The actual fighting should happen within the next two chapters! Review please, it keeps me motivated!!

Peace, Love, and Doughnut,

_Shiny Ryuichi Sakuma_


	17. Chapter Seventeen

Title: On This Cross

Fee Fi Fo Fum, I smell the blood of a disclaimer. Not mine XD

Warnings: This is a boy love story. If gayness squicks you then why are you on chapter 17?

_Baby, don't you know_

_I love you so?_

_Can't you feel it when we touch?_

_I will never, ever let you go, _

_I love you oh so much._

_You can dance, go and carry on until the night is gone and it's time to go._

_If he asks if you're all alone, can he take you home, you must tell him no_

_So don't forget who's taking you home and in whose arms you're going to be_

_So darling, save the last dance for me._

_**-The Drifters**_

Chapter Seventeen

"Harry?!!!" a shriek sent both Tom and Harry quickly away from each other.

"I can explain this Hermione!" Harry hastily exclaimed, cheeks blushed with embarrassment and looking thoroughly aroused. "You see, we were fighting and I was trying to"

"To get in his pants?" Hermione said, smiling like Sylvester when he caught Tweety. She laughed at the horrified expression on Harry's face. She winked conspiratorially at her friend. "I'm not stupid. It's about time you learned that. I've known since he came here that you two were more then mere acquaintances. You love each other and Harry, I'm not mad. If anything I'm relieved that you're not alone anymore. You always seemed so depressed when you were here and then when you returned from your mission…you were a different person. I hadn't seen you smile and mean it for a long time."

"Were we that easy to read?" Tom asked, dusting imaginary flecks from his clothes as he rose to his feet.

"Oh no, I doubt anyone else saw it but I've come to know Harry better then I think he knows himself sometimes."

"You aren't disgusted or disappointed or"

"Of course not!" Hermione rolled her eyes. "Why on earth would I be?"

"I'm gay and my boyfriend is Tom Riddle."

"Harry, if I cared about any of that then I wouldn't be a true friend, now would I?" Hermione grinned as Harry threw himself into Hermione's arms. She caught Tom's possessive glare but as soon as it appeared it vanished. Finally, the two had an understanding between them. "It doesn't matter that you're in love with him. What matters is that you're happy with him."

"Thanks, Hermione. You…you haven't told Ron, have you?"

"Goodness, no! I figure you'll tell him on your own when you're ready. I actually came here to tell you that Remus is calling the Order together. I'm afraid that Tom isn't invited. I think Remus doesn't want everyone to know about him yet. I certainly didn't expect to find the two of you kissing, well, groping."

Harry's faced turned a darker shade of red. He glanced at Tom, squeezing his hand tightly. "I'll tell you everything when I return. What are you going to do while I'm gone?"

"Masturbate since we were interrupted," he quipped sardonically.

Hermione went several hues of crimson as her mouth opened and closed. "That is definitely more information then I wanted to hear! Come on, Harry. Remus sounded pretty urgent."

Tom wanly smiled as he watched Harry give him a wave as he and Hermione started to descend the stairs. His thoughts wandered from how incredibly domesticated he was becoming to Harry and the occurrence of earlier. What had compelled the images in Harry's mind and the physical pain he'd felt? Had Voldemort somehow exerted himself in Harry's mind and learned of Harry's relationship with him? Tom's fists clenched beside him. If that were so then Harry was in a worse of a predicament then he originally was. It meant that Voldemort could expose the fragile intertwining of Harry's mind and use it to his advantage.

…

"Our spies of reported of a disturbing amount of Death Eaters within the vicinity of Godric's Hollow," Remus began, noticing Harry, Hermione, and Ron join the meeting. Not meeting Harry's eyes, he addressed the rest of the Order. "As you all know, Godric's Hollow is where Harry's parents were killed. We aren't positive as to why Voldemort is interested in Godric's Hollow but it's clear that there is _something_ there that has drawn his attention. Until our spies return with more information, we have to remain patient and ready. We could leave any minute now."

"Lupin, why do"

Harry didn't hear the conversations around him or the questions that Kingsley was asking Remus. Voldemort had plans involving the home he'd known for a short time; a home that he couldn't even recollect but for a woman's lullaby and a man's laugh. Could it all be just a trap? Maybe Voldemort knew Harry would come and with Harry came Tom. Harry shivered. It had felt terrifyingly real. The despair and agony that had threatened to dissolve all that Harry had so possessively clutched to his heart and soul, not letting anyone in the chinks of his deteriorating stability.

And it seemed Voldemort had effortlessly been able to obliterate that wall. Did that mean he knew about Tom? Harry's tremors worsened as he considered all the possibilities that lay within that moment that Voldemort and Tom came face to face. Would Voldemort immediately curse Tom or would it be vice-versa? Would Tom wave the white flag of surrender and join Voldemort? The tears splashed against Harry's hand. Was he falling apart? Was he actually _that _weak? Arms were around his waist, leading him from the room. He knew they were staring at him. Their Golden Boy had a nervous breakdown in front of them. That wasn't exactly positive for morale.

"Harry, are you alright?"

"I'm fine. Why?" Harry responded automatically.

"You're crying. You screamed. I…does this have to do with Tom or with Voldemort? Or is it a mix of both?" Hermione shot a Ron a threatening look that he immediately took as a sign for him to be quiet. "You're frightening me, Harry. You…you aren't normally like this."

"Voldemort knows. He knows…everything. I can _feel _him, Hermione," Harry whispered, hand touching his scar, feeling it throb underneath his fingertips. "It's not only that. There's a fear in my heart that won't go away. I think Voldemort's planning something. He _wants_ me there and I have to go. I have to fight him. Others are always fighting my battles for me. I have to do this."

"Harry…you aren't hiding behind anyone, if that's what you think," Hermione frowned. "And we fight for you because we care about you. I know…in the end that it _has_ to be you. The prophecy says"

"I know what the fucking prophecy says! I'm going to die!" He ignored his two best friends wincing. "I'd better get used to it. Hermione, don't tell Tom about this. He's worried about enough already. He doesn't need more reasons," Harry said, running a hand through his hair, the weariness seeping into his voice.

"Why would he give a fuck about you?" Ron barked, eyes blazing. "He's a selfish little bastard that terrorized my sister or have you forgotten that?! How can you talk about that son of a bitch as if he"

Harry's fist collided with Ron's face, instantly breaking his nose. "Don't you _ever_ talk like that about him again!" Harry snarled, green eyes alight with anger. He struggled with the urge to pummel Ron in the Order's headquarters and to just leave, to not give into his fury. He took several deep breaths to calm himself. He didn't even look at Hermione or Ron as he apparated from the building.

"Oh Ron, why can't you ever just keep your mouth shut?" Hermione sighed, repairing Ron's broken nose with a quick spell. "No, you don't need to know. Harry's not comfortable yet but you need to learn to control your temper. I don't want to spend what could be our last days estranged."

…

It was late when Harry returned to Hogwarts. There were barely any students milling around after hours. The ghosts were the only beings that Harry passed but they hardly acknowledged him. He shouldn't have snapped, shouldn't have let Ron's words bother him but he couldn't stand there and listen to Ron insult his boyfriend. Not that Ron knew. Out of everyone, Ron was the one that Harry was most afraid of telling the news of his relationship with Tom to. Ron would be the one to take it the worst followed by Ginny as a close second. It wasn't that Harry was ashamed of his sexuality or of Tom. He was petrified of losing his friends because of it.

Then there was Voldemort. The wave of panic that threatened to deluge him reared itself. His instincts warned him that his surmises were correct. Voldemort knew. He had to have known. The connection that existed between himself and the Dark Lord was irrefutable. Did Voldemort experience some of Harry's life just as he did Voldemort's? Had Voldemort been in his mind during the night he'd lost his virginity? Had he been there when he'd first told Tom he loved him? Harry contemptuously smirked. If anything, that probably scared the living daylights out of Voldemort to see himself behaving romantically towards the boy he hated. Or maybe Voldemort didn't even recognize Tom. Could the Horcuxes have taken his memories in addition to his soul? It was an uplifting thought.

"Harry?"

"Why are you up?" Harry asked, surprised to find himself in a deep embrace with Tom. "You're acting like I've been gone months."

"I had a dream about you," Tom said softly, grip tightening around the other boy. He nuzzled the dark strands of hair beneath him, inhaling Harry's scent. He always reminded Tom of the trees after it rains. "I dreamt that you were falling and that you kept calling my name but I didn't help you. I killed you, Harry. I cursed you. There was so much blood, Harry. Am I becoming _him_? Is this a sign?"

"No." Harry took hold of Tom's hand and led him towards the room they'd been sharing unbeknownst to his friends. "It was a nightmare. I always have them. I've dreamt of…of worse things, Tom."

"I also dreamt of Draco Malfoy."

"Oh?" Harry squelched the jealously that flared.

"I saw him, Harry. I took your Invisibility Cloak and followed McGonagall. He shouldn't have lived, Harry. He wasn't meant to. I could have been the one to do that to that boy. I could have become a monster. If you hadn't come along and saved me, I might have already turned into the Devil. But inside me, it's there. It's always there, Harry. It's like its hiding and I don't have any control over it."

"We can fight it. Together."

Tom's heart sang at the honesty in Harry's eyes. As Harry undressed, thoughts of his demons retracted to the furthermost recesses of his mind. His arousal was steadily growing as Harry took his sweet time removing his clothes. Tom gazed at the smooth planes of muscle that he'd memorized by touch. The teasing line of hair that led into his boxers sent heated chills throughout Tom's body. It had been a while since they'd been intimate. The kiss from earlier had set Tom's blood on fire. "Harry," Tom's voice was husky.

Harry paused in taking his socks off to glance at Tom. The fiery desire on Tom's face was breathtaking. Tom rose from the bed to encircle his arms around Harry. He could feel Tom's erection straining against his jeans. "Tom. I…I don't think we should be doing this right now. I mean there are threats of"

Tom nipped at Harry's neck, feeling the boy shudder beneath him. "I want you."

It was amazing what those three words did to him, spoken in that sibilant voice that made his toes curl with the prospect that mind-blowing pleasure was soon to follow. All reservations about the war and imminent death vanished. Harry moaned, hating how wanton he sounded to his own ears. To Tom, it was music and the sign he needed to continue, that Harry wouldn't resist.

Neither knew what was to come in the morrow but for now they were together; the most important thing to either of them.

…

Steadily getting towards the end, hooray! I'm still debating a Draco/Tom side part to this or just having Draco with a female. I'm not positive yet. Oh and I absolutely loathe Ron so there's quite a bit of Ron bashing from here on out. Sorry.

Please review!

_Peace, Love, and Doughnuts!_

Shiny Ryuichi Sakuma


	18. Chapter Eighteen

Title: On This Cross

Fee Fi Fo Fum, I smell the blood of a disclaimer. Not mine XD

Warnings: This is a boy love story.

_Sensation washes over me  
I can't describe it  
Pain I felt so long ago  
I don't remember  
Tear a hole so I can see  
My devastation  
Feelings from so long ago  
I don't remember_  
**Disturbed, Remember**

**Chapter Eighteen**

"Do you think it'll happen today?" Hermione asked quietly, reading _An Unprejudiced Guide to Elves_ by the fireplace in the deserted Gryffindor Common Room. "You know, the attack on Godric's Hollow?"

"I don't think anyone _knows_ when he'll attack. Only soon," Harry replied, watching the fire dance in the hearth. He hadn't seen Ron all morning. Tom was still in bed as far as he knew. "When he does, I want to leave without telling Tom. I don't want him to see me die."

The book fell to the floor with an echoing crash. "You're not going to die," Hermione said fiercely. "There could be hidden meanings in the prophecy. There could be different ways to interpret it. As for Tom? I won't _let _you abandon him here while you fight. He's just as capable as the rest of us and besides, _he_ wouldn't_ abandon_ you. You know he wouldn't. You're impossible sometimes."

Harry sighed. "But you know I _have_ to go. I have to end this, once and for all. Even if we haven't destroyed all the Horcuxes."

"No, there's still two remaining but the Order's been working non-stop to locate them. It shouldn't be very long before they're found." Harry gaped at her in astonishment. "I had to tell Remus, Harry. You were gone. We couldn't afford to waste any more time waiting for you to return. Ron and I couldn't do it alone. Speaking of Ron, you might want to apologize to him. He deserves to know about Tom just as much as anyone else. He's been your best friend for years."

"He's also the person that'll probably stone me to death when he hears I'm a fucking fairy and my fag boyfriend's Tom Riddle," Harry snapped, glaring at her. "You don't understand, Hermione. I've heard how he talks about gay wizards. He thinks they're not normal. He _still_ won't be alone in the same room with Seamus."

"Then what are you going to do about Christmas? It was decided we'd all go to Burrow."

"Hermione, we might not even be here!" Harry exclaimed, exasperated. "Christmas is the last thing I'm worried about."

Hermione fixed him with one of her Looks. "Harry," her voice was soft and Harry knew he was in for a lecture, "Christmas should be one of the first things on your mind. Christmas reminds us how important family and friends are during times like these. I know you're scared. I am too. We _all_ are. But we all have each other and that keeps us strong. You just happen to have a wonderful boyfriend that would do anything for you, even die for you. Not many people can say they have that. Me included," she smiled wanly, hands worrying the tattered edge of the book beside her. "I look at the two of you and wish I had someone."

"I thought…well…you and Ron would get together."

Hermione laughed. "No! Our views are extremely different. I used to like him but he just won't grow up. I miss Viktor. He might not have been the most talkative person but he was the best company I've had. Besides, he liked _me_. I still find it hard to believe that out of all the girls here, he chose _me_ to be his date for the Yule Ball."

"There's nothing wrong with you Hermione. It shouldn't be that difficult to believe."

"Well it is. I'm not pretty like Cho or Lavender. I probably never will be but I'm okay with that because I'd rather attract one breathtaking man then dozens of men that are only after one thing."

"And Krum was breathtaking?"

Hermione rolled her eyes. "You only saw the outside layer of him."

"So he's like an onion?"

"If you wish to use that analogy then yes, he's like an onion."

Before Harry could respond, a coldness embraced him in its icy hold. Harry felt his heart pound furiously in his chest. A chill sweat beaded on his forehead. He was in a forest. There was no sound within the darkness of the eerie trees. Not a leaf blew, not a bush rustled, and not a creature scampered the ground. There was no light save the tip of a wand. Harry walked forward on a roughly beaten path, twigs not even breaking underneath his feet. It was almost as if he were gliding.

"_I'm expecting you_," Harry spoke, hissing in ParselTongue. "_I'm expecting you to be there. It won't be long now. A few more preparations and we will meet in Godric's Hollow. A climatic ending to your life that will have all bowing to kiss my feet once you're dead. Bring everyone you love and cherish so I can break their spirits. They'll offer no resistance after that. It'll be perfect. My grand finale before I annihilate every half-blood and Muggle alive. Say your goodbyes now, Harry."_

A searing sting brought Harry to reality. The tears gathered in his eyes at the viciousness of the pain. A warm wetness slid down his face. Gingerly, he raised his hand to his scar, gasping. Blood was on his fingers. "Your scar! Harry, we have to get you to the Infirmary. What happened?"

"Voldemort. He wants me there," Harry winced, "And no, I'm not going to the Infirmary. I'm not going to worry everyone. This is just Voldemort's way of torturing me. I'm fine."

"You're not fine! Your scar's _bleeding_. How can that be fine?!" Hermione asked getting to her feet, on the verge of hysteria and ready to take Harry by force if need be. "At least tell Remus."

"No. It's my fight," he gritted through clenched teeth, already walking towards the stairs. "Stop mother-henning me. I get enough of that from Tom. I appreciate your concern but it isn't necessary. Thanks, though, for caring," Harry said on an after note, flashing Hermione a strained but genuine smile. It seemed to put her at ease for the time being. Harry wondered if this was what it was like having a sister around.

Harry's façade of strength faded as he entered Tom's bedroom to see that it was empty. He sank down onto the bed. Tom had been gone for a while; the bed was void of any body warmth that might have come from Tom just waking and heading towards the bathroom. Harry noticed his Invisibility Cloak was absent. _With Draco_, Harry thought, sighing. He knew he had no reason to be envious or suspicious but it was still upsetting to know that your lover was visiting one of your once hated rivals.

Rising from the bed, Harry went into the small bathroom that Remus had considerably included in Tom's chambers. He pressed a damp cloth against his scar, carefully soaking the blood into it. Voldemort wanted him there. Harry wasn't nearly as disturbed as he should have been. He wasn't even that troubled that Voldemort could access his mind at any given second of any given day. Sometimes it worked to Harry's advantage to be able to see into Voldemort's mind.

"You're occupied if you didn't hear me calling your name," Tom said, taking the cloth from Harry's hand to finish wiping the blood from his face. "Hermione told me what happened." He gently dried the area with a clean towel. "What was it about this time?"

"…Voldemort told me he wants me to be there when he goes to Godric's Hollow. He wants that to be our final fight, to decide the victor. But I know him. Or, at least I know how his mind works. He has a hidden motive. He wants me there for another reason. I think he knows about you. I think he wants to control you or recruit you one."

"I'd like to see him try," Tom said dryly. "And you're probably right. I wouldn't announce my intentions without having another plan to go along with. I know he wouldn't either since essentially, we're the same person," Tom shrugged, caressing Harry's back. He felt Harry tense underneath his fingers. "Get used to it. I'm just a younger version of Voldemort."

"That doesn't mean you have to proud of it," Harry scowled, jerking from Tom's touch.

"I'm _not_ proud of what he's done. I see Draco and-"

"Speaking of Draco, what's your obsession with him?"

"My _obsession_? I look at him and I _hate_ myself. I _hate _that I envy the power to do that much damage and not give a fuck about the consequences. I could have done that to him, Harry, and not have given a damn he if died. Don't accuse of me of anything based on your assumptions."

"I'm sorry," the words sounded empty even to him.

"Not you're not," Tom retorted. "Do you want to see Draco, Harry? To look at him and feel justified that Draco Malfoy finally got what he deserved? That all those years of taunting and insults against you and your friends and your family are now avenged?"

"Don't-"

"Or is it because you fancied him? Maybe he was your first crush on another boy. Maybe he's who you see at night when we're having sex? Do you stop yourself from calling his name instead of mine? Is that it, Harry? Or do you think that I might have a go at him once he's better? Oh, maybe you think that I've already raped his unconscious body. Obviously you think that little of me that a notion like that wouldn't be far-"

"I said, DON'T!" Harry snarled, wand pressing against Tom's chest, his motions nearly faster then human eye could see. "Why are you doing this to me?!! I haven't done anything to deserve this!"

"It's always about YOU! Poor, pitiful, Harry Potter. You're not the one lying almost comatose on a bed in a room that used to serve as a torture chamber! You're not the one that was uprooted from his life only to find that he walked right into Death!" Tom's voice was a hiss as he glared angrily at Harry, hand coming to rest on Harry's wand. "And you most definitely are _not_ the victim of this. You knew your fate the day you were aware of Voldemort's connection to you. You knew that you wouldn't live to see old age. You knew that you wouldn't probably make it past twenty. Yet you brought me with you, knowing full well you were going to die! You brought me into a world that I don't know. I don't even know what's happened the last fifty years. You think this is hard on you, Harry? You have no idea what it's like for _me_."

"I fell madly in love with you, Harry. I can't imagine my life without you but to know that you are most likely going to die any day now?" Tom shut his eyes, tears threatening to form underneath the closed lids. "It hurts. It's the worst pain I've ever felt. And you won't let me be by your side for it. You won't let me die with you. Don't you realize that when you're taken away from me, part of me fades? And then, you accuse me of cheating on you with a boy that doesn't even know I'm there? Don't presume to know anything."

Harry lowered his wand, entire body quivering with emotion, eyes gazing in Tom's blazing green ones. "I…I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make any assumptions. You've been spending so much time with him that it feels like you're ignoring _me_."

"You need to grow up, Harry. Life isn't always centered around you," Tom said, sighing, reaching forward to touch his lover's face only to have him avoid it. "You have a lot to deal with, I understand that. I really do. Come with me to see Draco and then you can make your own judgments."

Truthfully, Harry was terrified of what his eyes would see, of what his heart would feel. Would he still hate Draco once he saw him in his battered condition? He glanced at Tom staring at him tolerantly. God, how had he come to the conclusion that Tom was having a sordid love affair with Draco Malfoy? How, when in those beautiful green eyes, there was nothing but love and patience? In the back of his mind, he knew Tom was right. He did need to grow up. "I want to go. I have to see for myself."

"It's not a pretty sight."

Draco Malfoy had always prided himself on his appearance, flaunting himself through the school corridors, using his features to manipulate others into doing his bidding. Would this turn Draco from the path of darkness? _That's if he ever wakes up_, Harry thought, following Tom. He hadn't ever wished anything evil on Draco. Even when he'd used that horrible curse during sixth year, he'd been disgusted with himself. Those dreams of that day still haunted him.

…

"This is it," Tom whispered, throwing the invisibility cloak around them, descending the stairs that led to the dungeons. "I'm still curious as to what Hogwarts ever used dungeons for. Hasn't it always been a school of learning?"

"You'd have to ask Hermione. So, is this like an infirmary?" Harry asked, noticing that were several lamps on. He could hear people; some were moaning in pain while others were conversing quietly to each other. "Are these people like Draco? Not for the Light but not quite with the Dark?"

"You could say that. They wouldn't be safe at Mungo's, not when there's easy access to the patients. I haven't been able to discover the identities of any of them. I've been occupied."

Harry rolled his eyes, earning himself a swift jab to his shoulder. "What was that for?"

"For being a twat. Jealously is not becoming, Harry. Though, I am flattered to some strange degree that you'd feel envy for someone that hasn't opened their eyes in the past couple of days."

"You're funny," Harry drawled dryly. "You know, if I didn't know you as intimately as I do, I'd think you're a conceited little fuck. Honestly, you think you're God. News flash, you're not."

"Of course I am. You called me God the other night, remember?" Tom grinned brilliantly, laughing at Harry's scarlet flush. "Now shut-up. We're almost there and we don't know who's going to be in there."

Harry latched onto his lover's hand as Tom opened the door. The room was devoid of anyone save the young man on the bed. Harry's hand went limp in Tom's grasp. A leaden weight descended into his gut. Bile rose in the pits of his stomach until he felt he was going lose all contents of his intestinal track. He'd imagined Draco being wounded but nothing to this extent.

"Pitiful, isn't he?"

Harry nodded, not capable of forming coherent speech yet. He gently reached forward and caressed Draco's cheek. It was so cold. He had to glance at his chest to see the diaphragm moving, slowly but assuredly, to know the blonde was alive. He released a shaky breath. "I'm sorry."

"You're forgiven."

"Tom…I think I understand why you come down here. It's to chase all your demons away, isn't it? You see him and you realize you don't want to turn into Voldemort. You feel it, all the time, don't you?"

"The urge to…it won't ever be gone. With time, I can tame it, master it, but it'll still be there. Even if I live to be an old man, it'll be creeping in the corner of my mind, waiting for the chance to take over."

"I won't let it," Harry said, defiantly. "We'll be two old farts one day, too elderly to do anything but sit and rock. It actually sounds kind of nice," Harry grinned, thoughts of the upcoming battle and all that might happen, seemed obsolete as he procured images of himself and Tom eighty years down the road. "And our great-grandchildren? Oh, they'll love us because we'll spoil them rotten."

"Great-grandchildren? You're getting ahead of yourself, aren't you? We have to have children first."

"I know that." Harry rolled his eyes. "I was just planning our future." His eyes glanced from Tom to Draco. "I wonder if he'll have a future? There's nothing we can do. That bothers me the most."

"We should leave before someone comes. As much as I don't mind being caught visiting Draco, I don't think they'd be too keen on the idea that the boy they don't trust knows where they're keeping their injured."

"They do trust you. A little." The look Tom gave him was incredulous. "A tiny bit maybe?"

"I don't even think that much."

Harry gazed at Draco one last time as he and Tom closed the door. He would fight to save people like Draco, people that bared the brunt of Voldemort's violence and hatred. Mostly, his eyes drifting to Tom, he would fight for Tom and the future he so desperately yearned to share with him.

…

It had started snowing early that evening with no signs of ending. Most of the students had left that morning for their homes, enjoying Christmas with their families, the thought that it may be their last Christmas together lingered on their minds though none spoke of it. Those that remained did so by their parent's decision. It wasn't safe for Muggle-borns to travel. Harry shivered as he wrapped a blanket around his shoulders, watching the snowflakes fall to the ground from the window of Tom's room.

Two arms wrapped around his waist. "What's wrong? You're in one of your moods."

Harry sighed, leaning into the embrace. "I miss having a family this time of the year. Everyone else has people to go to but I don't have anyone. An empty house with a cranky house-elf doesn't count. I don't know. I just…I wish I had that. Stupid, I know. You don't have to tell me."

"Actually, I was going to say you do have a family. Me. I know it's a small family but it'll grow."

"It's not the same," he said softly.

Tom tightened his hold on Harry, kissing his neck comfortingly. Both were orphans with dark childhoods. It was one of the parallels that bound them. The thought of bonds reminded Tom… "You do realize we're practically married. The bond could be constituted as a marriage without the paper work and rings."

"I know. I think about it." Harry was _not _about to admit that he fantasized about an actual wedding one day. God, was he becoming that mushy and girly? He'd never live it down if anyone knew. He could hear Ron teasing him now. Not that Ron would ever know about his relationship with Tom. "I'm supposed to be going to Ron's for Christmas."

"Isn't he the one that's been avoiding you? The one with the black eye?"

"…How'd you know _I_ did that?"

"Your knuckles are bruised," Tom said, gently raising Harry's hand to kiss his injured knuckles. "You broke his nose too. I gave plenty of people black eyes at the orphanage. I know what goes along with punching someone in the face. I couldn't always use magic, Harry."

"No, I guess not. Were you coming with me?"

Tom laughed until he saw that Harry was serious. "I can't. He can't stand to be around me and his sister isn't any better. They don't even know about us! Besides, I doubt I'd be welcome in their home. Not everyone's as forgiving as you, Remus, and Hermione."

"Well I'm not going without you. No way. We can stay here."

"You go. I'll be fine on my own. I don't need a babysitter," he scowled.

"It isn't about baby-sitting you. It's about you not being alone. I might have to tell Ron and Ginny about us but its better then you being stuck here on Christmas. Come on, I'm hungry."

"Yes, princess." He narrowly dodged Harry's fist.

Before they could step foot into the Common Room, Hermione was already on her way towards them. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to say anything! It just kind of came out and I'm so sorry. He pestered me and now I've made a royal mess of this!"

"Oh fuck. Don't tell me you did what I think you did." Harry swallowed the bitter taste in his mouth as he saw Ron walking in their direction with a determined, angry expression that he'd seen before. Ron was mad. Mad wasn't even the right word. He was on the war path.

"You have some fucking explaining to do, Harry," Ron snarled, glaring heatedly at Harry before turning to look in hatred at Tom. "How could you do this, Harry? I don't give a flying fuck that you're a queer but how could you betray all of us by…sleeping with him?!" The disgust was evident. "He's TOM RIDDLE! I would've been okay if it'd been Seamus or someone like that. Someone we _trust_. Not…I don't get it."

"And you don't have to get it. I love him. He loves me. It's as simple as that," Harry said coolly detached. He was proud of himself for not either punching Ron again or sobbing. It could go either way. "You don't know him. You have no right to judge him."

"I'm not judging him. I know what I've read and been told."

"And he's changed. Ron…I'm not telling you to accept us but give us a chance. Give him a chance. At least do it for me."

"I can't. Maybe you better not come to home with me this year. Mum and Dad, well, they wouldn't be too happy to hear about this. And Ginny, she's torn up about it. I don't think I can forgive you for hurting her. Maybe with time but not now. It's going to take a while. I'll…see you next year or whenever You-Know-Who attacks, which ever comes first."

Harry felt he was in a dream as he watched Ron leave them alone to pack. He felt he'd just lost his best friend. It went straight to his heart as those treacherous tears rolled down his cheeks like twin faucets. He was numb as he felt Tom hold onto him. Hermione's comforting words were strained and distant. How could Ron have been so close-minded? How could Ron toss aside so many years of friendship and brotherhood just because he was in love with Tom Riddle?

…

Oh goodness. I didn't think that chapter was ever going to end. Of course, Ron wasn't accepting of Harry and Tom. I had to have at least one bad guy, you know? This chapter had a bit of angst, a bit of mushiness. A nice little mix.

If anyone knows a lists of commonly used spells, it would be awesome if you'd let me know. The final battle is approaching. There will be some bits of the Deathly Hallows thrown in there, like about Nagini and some of the character deaths but other then that, this doesn't follow canon.

I think I've finally decided Draco's love interest. It won't make its appearance until the epilogue. I'm keeping Draco as a minor character.

Please leave me a review so I know how I did. :-D Thank you!!!

_Peace, Love, and Doughnuts,_

_Shiny Ryuichi Sakuma_


	19. Chapter 19

Title: On This Cross

Title: On This Cross

Warnings: Boy x Boy loving! If that squicks you, you really shouldn't be this far into the story.

Disclaimers: If it were mine, would I seriously be going to college? No, I'd _own_ a college.

Notes: There's only five or six more chapters until this is finished. I have it all planned out and I hope that everyone enjoys it. This has been my child for several years now and I'll be glad once it's finished but I will be sad to see it go.

_But I, being poor, have only my dream;_

_I have spread my dreams under your feet;_

_Tread softly, because you tread on my dreams._

Yeats

**Chapter Nineteen**

Ron watched Harry and Tom all night. He noticed the touches that lingered a little too long for friendly pats or the stares that went straight through each other. Perhaps it was love but it just didn't sit right with him. Tom had to have had an ulterior motive. That was the only explanation that the monster from nightmares had so quickly released his plans for world domination for a boy that was the embodiment of all the things he hated.

Maybe he'd passed judgment too swiftly. He hadn't talked to Tom, not in depth; he'd made his calculations based on rumors and history. The tenderness that passed between Harry and Tom was obvious despite how discreet they were being. Guilt reared its ugly head. "Do you see now, Ron?" Hermione murmured next to him, a hand on his shoulder, her brown eyes not full of the anger he'd been expecting to see but full of understanding and concern. "I didn't believe it either. I didn't _want _to. Unlike you, I gave Tom a chance and he surprised me. He truly loves him."

"And that doesn't freak you out in the least bit? That You-know-who is shacking up with our best friend?"

"Because he's our best friend, we have to trust his decisions."

"I don't think I can play buddies with him," Ron sighed, watching as Harry and Tom quietly left the Gryffindor Common Room. "I guess I'm a little biased because I've been here, you know? You're not a Pure Blood. You haven't been directly connected with _him_. I've been raised to know him and hate him and fear him. It's going to take awhile, Hermione."

She smiled and Ron knew everything was alright with them. "I'll take that. You might want to tell Harry how you feel. You kind of made a mess of things earlier. He thinks that you hate him and that he's lost you forever."

"He hasn't lost me," Ron scoffed, "He just…he could have told me. I'm his best mate. To find out that he's shagging Tom Riddle how I did wasn't exactly pleasant for me either. There's another thing that's been haunting me since he came here. What happens when they meet?"

Hermione shrugged. "No one knows. In all technicality, both of them shouldn't be able to exist in the same time. Of course, quantum mechanics is still a realm that's full of infinite possibilities that we've only started to solve. It's quite fascinating. Sorry," she blushed lightly at Ron's puzzled expression, "All I'm saying is that maybe with Tom coming to the future he's ripped a hole in the space-time continuum and that the Tom Riddle from 1945 is on a permanent vacation. Voldemort will never have existed."

"Okay, I'm going to pretend I understand what you're saying. So, it could be good or bad for us? That maybe they'll cancel each other out? Or that he might go to You-Know-Who's side? That-"

"Ron, trying to figure it out will only give you a migraine. We won't be positive until the time comes that they meet and I have a feeling that it's going to be sooner then expected."

"Do you think You-Know-Who knows about Tom?"

"I haven't the slightest idea. All I know is that we have to be there for Harry, no matter what. I think you should go talk to them, alone, without me," Hermione said, reassurance in her voice. "Just remember to duck."

"Gee, thanks Hermione."

* * *

Harry raked his hands through Tom's hair, listening to the other boy murmur contently against his lap. "I could definitely get used to this. Maybe if I become the supreme ruler of the world, I can hire you to be my personal assistance," Tom grinned, glancing at Harry's dead-panned face. "I'm joshing."

"Well it isn't funny. I don't even want to _think_ about it. Just the mention of any sort of supreme ruler makes me think about Voldemort that in turn makes me realize that my days are numbered."

"And you obsessing about it isn't doing anyone a favor." A knock came on their door. Tom lazily opened it with a flick of his wrist. Upon seeing the figure that entered, Tom was immediately on his feet, wand drawn and pointed threateningly at Ron. "You have a lot of nerve coming here. What the fuck do you want?"

Ron shuffled his feet nervously, looking between the two of them, deciding whether he should fight or try a different tactic; calm conversation. "I didn't come here to wage a war with you," Ron said, disarming himself by tossing his wand to the floor and throwing his hands up in a sign of submission. "I came to talk. I don't want to be enemies and Harry, Merlin, I shouldn't have been so stupid. You know me. I can't hold my tongue and my anger's pretty famous. It's a Weasley trait."

"It's okay," Harry said, placing a hand on Tom's wand, pleading with him silently with his eyes. "Ron, you really hurt me. I'm sorry that you can't see past your prejudices. He makes me happy. I wish you could understand that."

"I'm willing to try."

"Are you?" Tom snorted, shaking his head. "You're full of shit and I don't appreciate you coming in here like it'll all be forgiven. He's not an idiot. He's not going to take you back after how you acted."

"Yeah, well, I've been in Harry's life a lot longer then you have, asshole. I know more about him then you _ever_ could. Don't forget that. I've been there through it all."

"And I don't need to be reminded of the fact but there are certain _parts_ of Harry that you'll never know."

"That's enough! What the hell is wrong with you two?!" Harry snapped, furiously turning on them both, finger pointed in their general direction. "Ron, this is my life and I'll lead it how I want. You can either let me be or I'll have to permanently remove you from it. And I don't want to do that. Like you said, you've been there. As for you Tom, I don't need you protecting me like I'm some damsel in distress. I'm a grown man."

"You're hardly a grown man! You're an adolescent cat!"

"I'm going to pretend you didn't say that. Tom, please, just go. I want to talk to Ron alone."

"I- Oh fine. You do anything, I'll slit your throat," Tom snarled, purposely slamming against Ron with his shoulder as he made his exit, nearly knocking the red-head on his face.

"Does he always throw temper tantrums?" Ron asked, chuckling, trying to lighten the mood with humor.

"He likes getting his way," Harry said, sitting wearily onto one of the couches, knowing that Ron wouldn't be comfortable if he was on the bed he shared with Tom. "I'm glad you came. I thought I'd lost you."

"Yeah, Hermione told me. You should've told us, Harry. I wouldn't have been so mad if you had just been honest from the get go. Harry...I don't think I can ever be friends with Riddle. I'm sorry. I can tolerate him but that's about it."

"I can accept that." Harry draped an arm across Ron's shoulders and rested his head against Ron's. "I love you, you know that, right? Maybe not like how I love Tom but as a brother. You and your family showed me what it's like to be loved by someone that doesn't want something from me or worse, wants absolutely nothing to do with me. I don't think I'd want to live without you in my life, Ron."

The two sat there with no words being spoken between them for words were meaningless and all was for once right with the world despite all the hardships and heartache they would have to face in the near future; but they would face them together and that was the greatest enemy of evil. The powers of love and friendship are necessary to combat darkness and make its powers obsolete.

* * *

Tom wound through the twisting corridors of the school, ignoring the students around him, his temper at an all time high. How _dare_ Harry bide him leave when it was obvious Harry needed to be protected from the bastard's sanctimonious bullshit that would only result in a mental breakdown from Harry. Harry didn't _need_ Ron. He had all he would _ever_ need in him. Tom growled, ignoring the little voices in his head the reminded him that jealously was _extremely_ unbecoming.

He paused, finding himself at the stairwell that led into the dungeons and to Draco Malfoy. Curious that he had sub-consciously brought himself to that exact location, he descended the dimly lit stair case. Tom cautiously stepped inside Draco's room. He glanced behind him, making sure he wasn't being watched or that no one was coming. Silence echoed throughout the eerie prison. Satisfied, he took his customary seat beside of the blonde.

There was _something_ about Draco that had initially attracted him since that first night of discovery. Perhaps it was because he felt somewhat responsible for the condition of the boy lying broken in the bed. Maybe he hadn't been the hand that had cursed him or the voice that ordered the boy's demise but he couldn't refute that the guilt was there. Being with Draco reminded him to never take up the path of evil again. It reminded him that the most precious thing in life is love.

He could admit-only to himself and even that was done nauseatingly-that he was becoming soft. He was warping himself into all the aspects of humanity that he utterly loathed. Tom snorted aloud. Maybe that was taking it too far but there was a change about him. He noticed certain qualities of the life around him more closely. While that didn't make him a hopeless romantic it made him feel all the more insecure about his masculinity. Just last night he'd dreamt about a little cottage on the beach with a dog for Harry and a cat for him. Those dreams usually revolved around world domination and yet, that one dream had been the most prominent one in his memories.

Subdued groaning snapped Tom from his thoughts. His eyes widened as he found himself lost in beautiful silvery-blue eyes that reminded him of the sea after it storms. "I see you've finally joined the land of the living," he whispered, gently touching the pale face. "We weren't positive if you'd ever wake."

"Are you an angel?" Draco rasped hoarsely.

Tom laughed. "Only if you want your angels to be destined for Hell, then yes, I guess you could say I'm a fallen angel."

"Then I'm in Hell?" A wry grin curled Draco's lips. "I'm not surprised."

"You're alive and you seem to be awfully talkative for someone that was nearly dead less then a week ago. Shouldn't you be writhing in pain and moaning your distress?"

"Only I'd be given a sadistic fallen angel."

_A kindred spirit_, Tom thought, seeing that there was no joking matter to the ache in Draco's eyes or the wince that caused his face to contort. "It hurts? Or is that a stupid question?"

"Stupid question," he said, closing his eyes as another wave of pain swept through him.

"I know how to heal but in your case, I don't think that would be enough. I _can_ make you not feel it." A curt nod was all he needed as he placed Draco's hands in his, smirking as the other boy tensed. "You don't like being touched. I don't blame you but had I wanted to hurt you, I would have already done so. Be still."

Draco slowly let his body be limber as he listened to the gentle voice, speaking in words that he couldn't understand. He knew he'd heard the language before. It was there, in the back of his mind, but he couldn't place it. His eyes fluttered open to see the boy, whose name he hadn't asked, as he so tenderly held onto his hands. No one had ever showed him compassion save his mother. Then his eyes were drifting, drifting, drifting close, listening to a silken voice lulling him to sleep.

Tom released Draco's hands. He might not have been able to fully heal Draco's wounds but at least he could give him a brief release from the pain. He never had used his powers for good and in all honesty, healing another and providing reprieve for their suffering would have seemed ludicrous all of those months ago, before he'd met Harry. "Sleep well, dark prince," he murmured, rising to his feet. Maybe his act of charity would begin his repentance for all the sins he'd committed in his life.

* * *

"Harry!!"

Hermione flung the door to Tom's room open, frazzled and panting. "You. You have to hurry! Remus has called an impromptu meeting stat! He says it has to do with Horcuxes and that's it's imperative that we come immediately!" She grabbed them roughly before either could protest. "I think they've destroyed them all! Isn't that exciting?! That's one less obstacle for us."

"Hermione! You're pullin' my arm off!" Ron scowled. "I'm not a rag doll."

"I'm sorry but I'm thrilled," she said, flushing. "I see you two aren't fighting anymore."

"Yeah, well, I had some sense knocked into me."

"It's about time you stopped acting the role of the jealous husband that discovered his wife was bedding his boss. It's a soap opera classic!"

"Hermione, I don't even want to _imagine_ you watching that crap. Aren't smart girls supposed to read instead of obsess about soap operas?"

"Uh, what are soap operas?" Ron asked, frowning, not for the last time being the third wheel to one of his more Muggle inclined friends discussions that always thoroughly confused him. "And no, I'm not jealous. It's not like I'm trying to get into Harry's pants."

"Wouldn't that be positively _criminal_?"

"You need a boyfriend," Harry commented, shaking his head at the dreamy expression on Hermione's face.

"I do not!" Hermione squawked, tossing her curly brown hair as she turned to look in the opposite direction. "I have more significant matters in my life at the moment. Per say, defeating Voldemort and graduating. Boys don't merit _that_ high on my list of priorities."

"Tempus Fugit," Ron said to the gargoyles, receiving a grateful smile from Harry.

The trio ascended the platform to the Headmistress' office. Remus was alone. Suspicious, they glanced at one another, standing close to the exit in case the man was an imposter. "It's me. While I appreciate that the three of you are guarded, you should learn to trust your instincts. Sit down," Remus indicated the three chairs with a nod of his head. "Have you guessed why you're here?"

"The Horcuxes," Hermione quickly answered.

"That's right. They've all been located and annihilated. However, it would seem there's one more. Nagini, Voldemort's pet snake. We should have known. He keeps her close to him at all times. There's a small chance that we _might_ be able to kill Nagini but not without risking the lives of our friends. That's why when the time comes for the final battle, someone will have to destroy the snake. Someone will have to distract Voldemort long enough."

"So that's it? There's nothing more?" Hermione frowned, clasping her hands in her lap. "Nagini is Voldemort's faithful follower. She might be Voldemort's only trusted ally. We aren't going to able to kill Nagini while Voldemort's alive and we can't kill him unless Nagini's dead! At each turn there's another dead end."

"You're unusually pessimistic, Hermione," Remus said, "This isn't like you."

"I'm disappointed. That's all. I had high hopes that _all _of the Horcuxes were taken care of."

"Hermione!" Harry called as Hermione dismissed herself from the meeting. He knew there were tears on Hermione's cheeks. He wanly smiled. She didn't like people seeing her emotional; he still recalled their first year and she'd locked herself in one of the bathroom stalls.

"I'll go after her."

Harry grinned, turning to gaze at Remus as he heard the door close. "Those two need to admit that they're in love."

"Love's a fragile flower, Harry. In the right circumstances, it can bloom into a beautiful, vibrant plant. Under pressure, for the wrong reasons, that same flower can wither and die."

"Very poetic. Did you use your gift of prose on Sirius?"

Remus chuckled and Harry couldn't help but think that there were far too few laugh lines on the man's face. How many nights had Remus spent mourning Sirius? Had he cried himself to sleep? Did he stare at old photographs and wish with all his heart that he could be with one he loves? "I did but he was quite the charmer himself."

"How do you go on?" Harry blurted.

"Harry…"

"How can you get up every morning, knowing that he isn't there? How can you live your life without someone in it? Aren't you the least bit interested in anyone? Are you still in love with Sirius? Is he the reason you can't move on to another person?"

"…It's hard. Everyday, Harry, is the same. It's like a tape that rewinds and plays over, and over, and over again. When you spend every waking minute living and breathing because of one person, it's not that simple to say goodbye. Why are you interested in my love life, Harry?"

"You should be happy, Remus."

"One day, I'll find someone that doesn't mind my being a werewolf but until this war's over, it's not going to happen. Even then, there will _always_ be prejudices against werewolves. Finding a mate…isn't as simple as normal humans."

"I'm sorry for being so nosy," Harry said, rising to his feet, knowing that he'd upset Remus. "You look so lonely. It's hard not to notice."

"Thank you for your concern." Remus drew Harry into a bone-crushing hug that reminded Harry of Sirius. For a man who appeared to be frail to the naked eye, there was a strength to Remus that most never noticed. He breathed in blissfully as he enjoyed the moment.

* * *

_Fin_

Well, that's all for this chapter! Stay tuned!! winks

_Peace, Love, and Doughnuts,_

_Shiny Ryuichi Sakuma_


	20. Chapter Twenty

Title: On This Cross

Title: On This Cross

Warnings: Male x Male loving!

Disclaimers: Absolutely not mine

Notes: OH MY GOD!! I updated! Yay. Please leave me a review and I'll update more often.

**Chapter Twenty**

"I think I need to tell you something," Harry said, opening the door to Tom's quarters. "There's something more…sinister at work then you know. Something that could spell trouble for us."

Tom frowned. He laid his book on the table beside him and gazed closely at Harry. "What are you talking about? Trouble for _us_ or the Order? You aren't being very precise."

"Both," Harry sighed, "Voldemort was able to create a Horcux. Do you know what those are?"

"I'm not exactly an idiot, Harry. But yes, I know all about Horcuxes. I was on the verge of researching all information about Horcuxes before you decided to show up. I'm not proud of it. I know what they can do to a person's soul. I was willing, however, to do anything that was necessary to achieve my warped sense of perfection. Even willing to sell my soul to the Devil," Tom's voice trailed off into a whisper, tracing invisible patterns in the arm chair's cushions.

Harry bit his bottom lip, watching the brief flash of pain dance across Tom's beautiful face. The wince would've been unnoticeable by any outside observer but Harry had become quite apt at reading Tom's face over the last months. "Voldemort was able to…to make seven Horcuxes," he pointedly said, not daring to prolong the truth for fear of truly upsetting Tom. He knew that Tom was struggling with the past he had, the future he'd craved, and the present life he was adapting himself to. "We've managed to destroy six of them."

"You mean he created _seven_?" Tom breathed in awe, shaking his head. "Seven? How can you even split your soul in seven different pieces? How did you even know what he used?"

"Well, it wasn't that difficult once we realized that he chosen objects that had a specific meaning. I'd…I'd rather not go into it, if you don't mind. I don't think you need to hear about it."

"I understand," Tom said quietly, raising his eyes to meet Harry's concerned green ones. "I do, okay?"

"Ok. Unfortunately, we were only able to destroy six of them. The seventh is Nagini, Voldemort's pet snake. She's _always_ with him. The only way that we could destroy her is if we were able to distract Voldemort long enough. That'll be impossible anyways. It's like no matter which way we look at it, we're fucked. If we don't kill Nagini, we can't rightly kill Voldemort. If we do kill Nagini, there's the possibility that people will die in the process."

"Sometimes you have to sacrifice a few to save a thousand," Tom stated, annoyed at Harry's askance look. "Would you rather risk the lives of countless innocents who aren't even a part of this war to save the lives a couple of people that already know the risks?"

"I'd rather not risk anyone's lives," Harry scowled.

"Then you don't need to be in this war. You can't play nice and expect to win. Honestly, what are they teaching you children these days? All the great battles were won by heroes."

"Just because you're willing to let your friends die for the cause doesn't mean I am."

"I know how war goes, Harry," Tom said softly, resting his hands on the other boy's shoulders. "And I bet that if you ask anyone if they would be prepared to die for peace, they'd tell you yes in a heart beat. I know that you don't want any more of your friends to die but regrettably, all of your friends are tied to this war."

"I guess what you say makes sense," Harry rested against Tom's chest, breathing in the familiar scent. He closed his eyes as he felt Tom's arms wrap around him tightly. "But that doesn't mean that I have to like it."

* * *

Harry was nodding off against Tom's shoulder that morning for a late breakfast when Hermione's voice cut through the nearly empty Great Hall, "The Order found Draco Malfoy! He's been here the entire time recovering from some sort of attack! He's awake and they're going to interrogate him! What?" she squawked, disappointed that neither boy seemed all _that_ startled by Hermione's grandiose news. "Let me guess, you already knew?"

"Way to wake a man up, Hermione," Harry frowned, opening on eye to leer at his friend. "But yeah, we knew. Tom kinda found him a few nights ago."

"I'm relieved he's finally come to. We can get some answers. Are you feeling well enough to come with me?" Tom queried, kissing Harry's brow tenderly, earning a giggle from Hermione. "You know that he'll need allies down there. I don't expect them to be pleasant with him."

"Allies? Since when were you allies with Malfoy?" Hermione cocked her head to the side, hands akimbo on her hips. "That last time _I_ checked, you were still calling him a, and let me quote, 'a pasty faced little bastard.' End quote. Why are you all of sudden his benevolent protector? He _does_ need divine intervention but you two are hardly angels."

"If you're quite finished, I have to go. I'm not leaving him to those vultures. He's not a lamb ready for a slaughter. He needs time to heal mentally before they decide to verbally attack him. Harry, you can stay here. I promise to fill you in on all the details. Hermione can keep you company," Tom grinned cheekily at the sputtering brunette. "Take care of him."

"Oh as if you have any right-"

Tom was laughing to himself as he left the Great Hall, hearing Hermione's voice echoing in the empty room. The grin vanished the second the doors closed behind him. He knew he was risking a great deal by interrupting the Order's interrogation. He knew they wouldn't take too kindly to his vehement desire to shield Draco from them and he was all too willing to use force in order to do so.

Tom calmed his racing pulse as he descended the stair case to Draco's cell. He could already hear _them_. They didn't seem very polite. His temper flared as he entered the room. His wand was at the ready as he coolly said, "If you don't mind, he's in my protective custody and any harm you wish to do upon him will be directed at me. And trust me, I don't back down from fight," Tom sneered, green eyes flashing as he dared them to try anything.

"Riddle?! What the hell are you doing here?!" Alastor Moody snarled, his own wand shaking in his hand, his one good eye narrowed to slit at the intruder. "You got a lot of explaining to do!"

"He just woke. He doesn't need this," Tom hissed, facing the four Order members as he went to stand between Draco and them. "Is this the mercy you bestow upon people? You talk all high and mighty but when it comes down to it, your souls are just as black as mine. Are you alright?" Tom asked softly, glancing at the other youth, ignoring the enraged ex-Auror in front of him.

"What do you think? I haven't exactly been picking daisies, now have I?" Draco answered sarcastically despite his quivering voice.

"Tom, you have to understand. It's necessary that we get all the information from him now while it's still fresh in his mind," Remus approached him cautiously, perhaps the only one that could truly do so and not be cursed. "Other innocent lives will be taken if we don't do this. Surely you understand."

"I do but he doesn't need a firing squad. You don't give a fuck about him." Tom darted glowers at Moody and McGonagall. "I say no. I won't allow it."

"Allow it?" McGonagall raised both of her eyebrows. "I hardly think that you have any say in this matter, young man."

"Tom, you're not being logical." Remus looked at Draco. "_You_ must at least agree with us. Anything that you have to tell us will benefit us. I know that we probably aren't the most liked people in your opinion. I know that you probably would love for us to lose this war but we took you in and healed you. I think we deserve at least a little for that."

"You're right. I don't care," Draco irritably touched the scar on his left arm where the Dark Mark had been, "But I've seen what happens. I've been there personally. I want that son of a bitch dead and if any information I have can lead to that, then so be it. Don't misinterpret me," Draco snapped when all three were on the verge of speaking at once, "I'm not doing this for your precious cause and your fucking Mudbloods. I'm doing this for my own personal satisfaction."

"I wouldn't think any less of a Malfoy," Moody growled.

"Are you positive you're ready?" Tom queried, a flash of worry in his green eyes, noticing that Draco was trying his damndest to not betray the pain that he so obviously felt.

"Not here. This reminds me too much of…of where I was," Draco involuntarily shuddered as his eyes swept the confines of his prison, "And I don't want to speak to you two. Only him." Those beautiful eyes landed on Remus, surprising the werewolf for a brief second before he closed his gaping mouth. "He's the only one that could possibly understand me."

"I agree," Remus concurred. "We can go to my rooms, if you'd rather do this in a more comforting environment. And yes, this place is reminiscent of a cell I once called home years ago."

"I'm against this!" Moody snapped, tapping his cane against the floor angrily, electric blue eye rotating madly. "You'll be alone with _two_ deranged monsters, Remus. How can we be certain they won't murder you?"

"I have to agree with Alastor," Minerva said, siding with the ex-Auror. "We have no guarantees for your safety."

Remus smiled wanly. "I sincerely doubt that the either of them will cause me any harm. Had they been so inclined, they would have already killed the three of us. What would casting a few Unforgiveables be to two outcasts that have nothing in this world any longer?"

"You're annoyingly observant," Tom frowned, casting an irritated glare at the older man. "Would you rather have our wands for safe keeping?"

"Wands are useless to you," Moody growled.

"But it would ease the worry from _my_ mind." Minerva held her hand towards Tom and Draco. "You will be returned these as soon as Remus has finished. Should any harm become him the consequences will not be light."

Tom did not doubt the Headmistresses' words. He trailed behind Draco and Remus as the three of them left the holding cell. His eyes idly took in the blonde's appearance. He looked remarkably well for a person that has close to death not a few days before. A slight limp remained in his left leg and Tom had a feeling that that leg would never be truly whole again. He could hear the shallow, ragged breaths, no doubt from the severity of injury to his chest and shattered ribs. He glanced at Remus. He could almost see the human ears twitch as he listened to Draco's shallow breathing. Perhaps Remus knew that Draco was still painfully weak and that he posed no _credible_ threat to him.

Their walk through the castle was through rarely traveled corridors that neither younger wizard had seen before. "Is my presence required through this because to be honest, I'm not _that_ interested in listening to Voldemort's means of torture."

"Stay," Draco demanded softly, gray blue eyes lingering on Tom for several seconds before staring at the floor in front of them. "I know that you were there, though, I _am_ surprised that my constant companion while I healed was none other then Tom Riddle. I should hate you with every fiber of my being. I should want you dead. But for some reason I know that you're not _him_ and that you won't hurt me."

"Dog Star," Remus spoke the password to his rooms, receiving a knowing look from Tom. "I'm relieved that you decided to speak to us about your incarceration within Voldemort's encampment. I won't push you to tell me anything and I won't ask for any details that you're not comfortable telling me."

"You want to know, ask. I have nothing to hide." Draco sank down on one of the arm chairs in front of the fireplace.

Remus murmured a few words and the fire roared furiously in the hearth. He took a seat on the sofa; far enough from Draco for him to not feel as if he were cornered with no possibility of escape. As a dark creature he knew what it was like to feel trapped, to lose one's sanity in desperation to flee. "Are you hungry? Thirsty? I want you comfortable."

"Comfort hasn't be that high on my list of luxuries these past few months," Draco said, beckoning Tom to take the other chair beside him. "Survival was a bit more important."

"No doubt. Survival is an instinct that all humans feel. Some are stronger willed while others simply choose to die rather then face every day with the slimmest of hopes. You must have the will power of a Titan. Weaker men would have killed themselves rather then face torment at the hands of Voldemort."

"I chose to live so that I would see the day when that son of a bitch is destroyed once and for all," Draco seethed through clenched teeth, gray eyes flashing with anger. "I knew my life was over when I didn't finish the job I'd been assigned. I guess I have conscience after all," he spat distastefully.

"You shouldn't talk so…depressing. You were given another chance at life, no matter how bleak it may seem now, despite the reasons for being alive," Remus said, honey colored eyes sad, "I've often wondered about _why_ I'm alive as well. I'm a Dark Creature that humans want dead. I don't know why I haven't been hunted and I can't help but wonder if Albus hadn't had something to do with it. James and Sirius were the only two that fully accepted me as a monster. But this isn't about me. This is about you and all the information that you can give us to end this nightmare."

"Severus tried to help me escape but he couldn't rightfully do so and still keep his secret safe. He knew that his role as a spy was more important and I decided that if I died, at least he could pass his information on to the Order. I was taken to Voldemort by none other then my father. He couldn't deny his master." His voice was laden with disgust and loathing.

"Where is Voldemort?"

"It was an old farmhouse. I don't know the location. I'm sorry."

"I…I could probe your mind," Remus offered hesitantly, knowing that despite all of Draco's indifferent attitude towards the interrogation, he wouldn't appreciate having his mind raped. "I've been around nearly every country in the Europe. I could recognize certain places."

"I'm not interested in sharing my inner most thoughts," Draco drawled, lazily flickering his eyes towards the werewolf, "And believe me, you _don't_ want to know. Do you know what goes on in a Death Eater's-former Death Eater's-mind? It isn't pretty. I've done some foul things."

"Draco," Tom interjected, placing a hand on the blonde's knee, "I think that it might be a good idea for you to let him. You want this to end, don't you?"

Draco glanced at the hand touching him and then met Tom's deep green eyes. He had never seen pictures of Voldemort when he was young-he assumed Voldemort wanted to forget about the time when he was a mere mortal and not next to godliness-but this beautiful young man was nothing like he could have imagined a youthful Voldemort to be. There was a barely concealed darkness about him buried underneath a layer of genuine compassion. He was terrified of the same darkness that awed him. "I do. I just…I don't like to relinquish control of myself to anyone."

Tom smirked. "You're much like myself. Should I be worried that you'll be taking my place some day?"

"Only if I lose my mind."

Remus watched the interaction between the two, surprised by the camaraderie that existed. He hadn't expected them to be _that_ alike. He knew that Draco was hardly a kind person and only had allies rather then friends. Tom had only recently started to allow himself to feel friendship towards other people that he would have previously deemed enemy. So why had these two boys, with their black souls, found a bond that few rarely _ever_ developed? He could sense it, that growing amity, and he had to wonder if this would cause a rift between Tom and Harry. The discord that had always been between the Boy-Who-Lived and the Malfoy heir wouldn't be easily dissolved.

"Professor? Are you even paying attention or is this conversation worthless to you?"

Draco's sharp voice snapped Remus from his musings. He mentally cursed himself as his cheeks flared warmly underneath two pairs of entrancing eyes. "I apologize. I'm not myself right now. I'm a bit peaky and far too observant for my own liking."

"The full moon is tomorrow night," Draco stated, "We can do this another time."

"We don't have very much of that, now do we?"

Tom interrupted, "Harry's going to murder me for telling you anything but a few days ago Voldemort tapped into his mind with their connection. He told Harry that he was too meet him at Godric's Hollow for the final battle and that it would be soon. If that's so then we _don't_ have time. We might not even have enough information to send spies to scout the supposed area before he decides to do something drastic to announce his arrival."

"Why didn't he say anything?" Remus sighed, pressing a hand against his forehead. "Did he think I would be angry?"

"I don't think anger's the issue. He didn't want you to worry about him."

"He's all I have left, Tom. If anything…" Remus shook his head, not daring to finish.

"We come here to talk about me and we get on Potter?" Draco scowled, "Why does he always somehow figure into everything? Just take me back to my prison. I don't want to talk about _him_ the rest of the day." He noticed Tom's frown. "What?" he snapped.

"You hate him?"

"No shit," Draco chuckled humorlessly, "It's all about Harry fucking Potter. I hope he dies. I hope Voldemort kills him."

"Tom-" Remus warned, already getting to his feet and placing himself in between Draco and the seething Slytherin. "There's no point in being upset."

"What…what the hell did I just miss?" Draco asked, brows drawn together, puzzled.

"…Harry and Tom are…are together. Romantically."

_Fin_

Dun Dun Dun!! Cliff hangers are awesome! XD But I have a good stopping point and a place to pick up at next chapter. I hope you liked it!!


	21. Chapter Twenty One

Title: On This Cross

Title: On This Cross

Warnings: Male x Male loving! **SEX AHEAD**

Disclaimers: Absolutely not mine

Notes: OH MY GOD!! I updated! Yay. Please leave me a review and I'll update more often.

**Chapter Twenty-one**

Tom rampaged through the castle, slamming into students that weren't quick enough to avoid him. He was angry and hurt. It felt like his heart would collapse in his chest with each step towards the Gryffindor Tower. Draco, the boy that he'd come to consider a friend, loathed the boy that he loved with all his soul. He knew that Draco and Harry weren't exactly friendly with one another but complete and total loathing? And yet, he felt closer to Draco because of their dark pasts, because of all the horrible deeds they'd committed in their lives. But at the same time, he and Harry had had terrible childhoods, were both orphans, and were in sync with the other. It was conflicting and confusing and he hated having _emotions_.

He practically screamed the password at the Fat Lady as he bolted through the Common Room and stomped up the stairs. "Tom!! Tom! If you're looking for Harry, he's not there. He's on the Quidditch field," Hermione was on his heels as he neared his room. "Are you alright?" she asked, knitting her brows in worry, following behind him as he took off blindly towards the pitch. "What happened? Tom, I'm your friend. You can trust me."

Tom slowed his steps at her honest words, allowing her to catch up with him. He sighed, seeing the compassion in her dark eyes. "I never knew that Draco and Harry _hated _each other. I've been making nice with my boyfriend's enemy! And Harry never told me. Even after I informed him that I'd been visiting Draco. But I can't turn my back on Draco. He needs me. But I don't know how to deal with this. I can't split myself in two."

Hermione frowned at the torn countenance of the last person she'd ever thought she'd consider friend and felt a fresh wave of pity wash over her. Tom had never dealt with emotions as complex as this in his life; he hadn't been taught to and he hadn't wanted to experience them either. "Tom…I think you'll come to find that Harry has one of the biggest hearts that you'll ever see for the rest of your life. He's remarkably selfless and forgiving for someone that's gone through all that he has at his age. He won't ask you to stop being friends with Malfoy and he won't be angry either."

"I guess I still have a lot to learn about him," Tom said, shielding his eyes as the bright, winter sun nearly blinded him. He saw Harry zipping around on his broom nimbly, laughing as he ran a circle around Ron. "I remember when I first saw him. I couldn't stop staring at him. He was so beautiful, so different from anyone else. He didn't expect anything from me. I think I fell in love with I saw him flying during one of our matches. He brought me the Snitch." Tom smiled at the memory, eyes not drifting from the figure performing aerial acrobatics that would put even professional players to shame at the graceful poises.

Hermione forced herself not to giggle and swoon. "It sounds like love at first sight to me."

"Maybe it was. Maybe he bewitched me."

Laughing, Hermione shook her head, "Well, Harry does have that affect on people. Unfortunately, it only stems from this world, from the wizardring world. Out there, in the Muggle world… Harry's a nobody. His own family hates him. I think that's why he's the way he is. Despite all the fame and wealth that he has as the Boy-Who-Lived, he's still humble and doesn't take anything for granted. I wish the love that he has for the world could extend to others. I think it would make living much more tolerable. Harry is Harry and that's simply enough for me."

Tom, in that instant, felt a greater appreciation for her as he slipped his arm through the crook of her elbow, surprising the witch at his unusual physical touch. "You are by far one of the most intriguing Muggles I have ever met."

"I take that as a compliment," Hermione grinned, shocked that this was the young man that eventually became the scourge of the free world. How could such a lovely boy become Voldemort? But in the back of her mind, Hermione had to wonder if the urges that shaped Tom into Voldemort weren't still there lurking for the right time to emerge. Was Harry his salvation? "Do you miss being home, in your time?"

"…There are a few individuals that I miss. I never thought that they would mean anything to me other then as future allies in my quest to rule the world. But now I have to wonder how they are."

"Do you regret coming here? You had your entire life ahead of you. You had your goals and your desires. Now that you're here…you're a ghost. Hardly anyone remembers Voldemort's given name. And even less remember what he looked like as a youth. You're fighting against yourself, essentially, in a war that has nothing to do with you."

Tom nodded, "I know but you're forgetting one key element that differentiates the past from the present," his eyes lovingly dwelt on Harry. "And I think that is more then enough of a reason to be here."

"I didn't like the idea of you and him being together," Hermione admitted, resting her head against Tom's shoulder, relieved that she actually had someone to speak with, someone that she knew would listen unbiased and not sugar coat anything. "But now…I don't think that anyone else could better suit him."

"Sometimes I think we're too alike because of the fights that we have. But then the arguments end as soon as they begin and we end up laughing over the sheer stupidity of it all. Do you not have anyone, Hermione?"

She blushed and shook her head. "I don't seem to have the gift of seduction like some of my classmates."

"You do. You just don't know it yet," he winked at her.

"Are you stealing my boyfriend, Hermione?" Harry teased, leaning on his Nimbus, sweat drenching his white undershirt, sweater tossed across one of his shoulders. "I don't mind sharing but I don't think Tom would like it. He isn't into anything kinky."

"I don't need to hear this! Come on, Hermione, you don't your ears corrupted either," Ron scowled, grabbing Hermione by the hand and dragging her towards the entrance, tossing Tom and Harry a disgusted look as they vanished through the corridor.

"You know, I must be a sadist because now that I can mess with Ron's head, I'm going to. He doesn't mind the whole gay thing but he doesn't like hearing about bedroom activities. What?"

Tom rose to his feet. "Don't you need to put that in the broom shed?" Tom asked, already walking towards the building, a confused Harry in tow. "We wouldn't want anyone to steal your broom, now would we?"

"It's the old model. I haven't had time to buy a new one. I don't think it would matter. You're awfully concerned about my broom," Harry noted, leaning the Nimbus against the other Gryffindor brooms.

"I had a fantasy about this," Tom grinned wickedly, shoving Harry against one of the walls, shafts of light filtering through several windows providing Tom a clear view of Harry's bewildered face. "But it was _against_ the broom shed, not in it. But it's too cold outside and I wouldn't you to freeze. Then again…you wouldn't be able to resist anything that I want to do to you either," he said, taking in the flushed and wind swept appearance of Harry. "You already look like you've been fucked."

Harry inhaled deeply at the predatory gleam in Tom's eyes as the larger boy pushed him against the wall, trailing sweet kisses from the lobe of his ear to the tip of his nose to his chin, everywhere but his lips. "Tom," Harry whined, gyrating his hips against Tom's groin, already feeling the hardened arousal against his own. He shivered in anticipation.

"Turn around," Tom breathed in Harry's ear.

Casting Tom an exasperated look, Harry obliged. He felt Tom's hands guiding his own to rest against the wall. A leg in between his thighs silently urged him to part them. Harry felt Toms fingers skillfully unzipping the fly of his trousers. Tom licked his lips as he slowly lowered Harry's pants, languidly revealing the smooth globes of Harry's ass that were so inviting, so familiar. He casually ran a hand across the taunt muscle, feeling a shudder wrack Harry's frame, seeing his eyes close in excitement. Licking his lips, Tom felt the desire from his head to his toes as he slipped a hand past the waistband of Harry's boxers and reached for the engorged manhood that lay waiting for him. He smirked as Harry arched against him. He knew how to make Harry mewl and moan, knew every spot that Harry had.

"I need this," he whispered softly, Harry's boxers joining his pants to pool at his ankles. "I need _you_."

"Take me," Harry murmured, hearing Tom unzip his slacks. That huge column of flesh that Harry had memorized was warm and insisting. He whimpered slightly, casting Tom a pleading gaze over his shoulder. "Now." The thrust a second later was forceful and brutal and Harry felt Tom's hand across his mouth as he stifled his scream as the pain ripped through him. It was rough and raw and woke a part of Harry that was carnal. The intermingling sensations as Tom pounded into him, stinging pain and blissful pleasure, was intoxicating as he felt harder and hotter then ever. It could have been a mix of the setting-being in such a public place, the chance someone _might _see-and the fact that Harry _knew_ this was something that Tom desperately had to have.

Tom braced himself against Harry's hips as he withdrew and impaled him again, driving deeper inside him, hearing Harry cry his name as he found the smaller man's prostrate. He angled himself, hitting that lump of nerves that had Harry's body quivering with the fiery ecstasy coursing his body. He rocked inside Harry, the feeling of that tight, wet, warmth was more then just a physical manifestation but it was a connection that reaffirmed that this was the one that he was supposed to love for eternity, the one that had managed to tame him.

Reaching around them, Tom stroked Harry's massive erection, seeing the half glazed look in Harry's eyes, the gratuitous groans and obscenities coming from that luscious mouth had him pummeling harder into, sweet sheening Harry's abdominal as he met every thrust with one of his own. Harry threw his head back against Tom's shoulder in sheer abandonment as he vigorously pistoned into that welcoming hand, each movement of his hips driving him back on the cock making his body thrum like a taunt guitar string.

He could feel Harry's inner muscles tightening as his erection started to spasm. Tom released a guttural moan as he felt Harry orgasm, his hot seed running down his hand as he milked every last drop from him. The vice like clamp on his own cock signaled his own release and within seconds he was moaning Harry's name for all the high heavens to hear.

Nearly collapsing against Harry, he held his strength long enough to mutter a cleaning spell before nimbly falling to the floor, drawing Harry down with him. "I'm not going to ask what brought that on because that was by far the hottest sex we've ever had," Harry commented, sleepily nuzzling Tom's neck with his nose. "But seriously, what's up?"

"Can't I fuck you in a broom shed without an ulterior motive?"

"Nope. Not really. Besides, you're never _that_ needy."

Tom sighed. "…Draco…he wasn't very receptive of…of…using being _friends_. I didn't know you _hated _each other."

"I don't hate him. He just rubs me the wrong way and no, don't even say anything and make it perverted. It started our first year. I met Ron and we became fast friends. The Weasley's aren't exactly rich and the Malfoy's consider them to be worse then Muggles because they're Muggle supporters and minglers. Anyways, Draco warned me against associating with them. I didn't take his hand in friendship and that was that. We've been at each other's throats ever since."

"Then you want me to stop speaking to him?"

"Tom, I don't tell you who you can and cannot talk to, well, except Lavendar but that's for the obvious reasons that she's a stalker. I don't mind. Actually, I think it's kinda _adorable_ that you've taken Draco in under your wing. He won't have many friends here. And it'll do him some good to have a powerful ally to scare away all the bogeymen."

"You really don't mind?"

Harry rolled his eyes. "If I minded, I would have forbidden you the day you told me you'd been sitting with him. No one can ever own you, Tom, not even a god. You're too perfect."

Tom couldn't speak, couldn't tell Harry that that meant more to him than he probably realized.

_Fin_

I know, terrible sex scene. I shudder when I read it. Ick. And I didn't get to the goods. Next chapter. I thought I'd drag it out, make you want to read more. I'm evil. Love you all!! Thanks for reviewing! Review again, ;)


	22. Chapter Twenty Two

Title: On This Cross

Title: On This Cross

Warnings: Male x Male loving!

Disclaimers: Absolutely not mine

**Chapter 22**

"Together? As in…" Draco frowned, brows knitting together as he worked through the exact implications that 'together' implied. "So you mean to tell me that Tom Riddle, aka Voldemort, is fucking Harry Potter, aka the Dark's worst enemy to have ever set foot on Earth in the history of Evil? I…think you've lost what's left of your sanity."

Remus chuckled softly, offering the younger wizard a glass of brandy, not surprised to see Draco down the contents immediately, not even flinching. "It's quite impossible but at the same, entirely beautiful. It's almost a contradiction, don't you agree? They should hate each other, should have already attempted to kill one another but instead, they've found a love that few can rival."

Draco blanched, pale face becoming an astonishing shade of white. "You're serious. I had thought that perhaps I could have actually been friends with Tom. Like everything else, Potter's ruined it. I guess it's karma," he smirked, "What's that expression? You get what you give? I believe I'm the definition of that particular quote."

"Harry's had enough thrown at him, Draco, and I hardly believe that he manipulated the situation to his advantage. One would think that for a man that's been given a second chance, he would be more appreciative, more compassionate," Remus' golden eyes flickered in the flames of the hearth. "That he would set aside his differences in order to live his life to the fullest."

"You sound like some Muggle shrink. Has sleeping with flea ridden mongrels warped you into a pansy?" Draco sneered, delighting in the flash of anger in those honeyed orbs. "You're a fucking _werewolf_! Aren't you supposed to be a goddamned monster, not some nonsensical queen?"

"You have a lot of nerve, Draco," Remus stood, "I think you should leave."

"Leave? Have I gotten under your skin?" Draco grinned darkly, approaching the older man boldly, knowing that within any second, Lupin could snap his neck or tear his heart from his chest. To have that kind of strength… "Are you pissed? Angry enough to hurt me?" he chuckled hollowly, baring his throat for the dark creature, lurking just under the surface of such a meek man.

"_Draco_," Remus growled in warning, willing the wolf at bay, loathing that the cycle started tomorrow night, that all of his werewolf attributes were more dominant so close to the full moon. "If you wish to commit suicide, do it on someone else's time. Not mine. I won't be responsible for your idiotic mistakes. STOP!" Lupin snarled, placing a hand on the blonde's chest, ceasing any attempts to edge nearer.

"You have more balls then I gave you credit for. You know, I can see the wolf, in your eyes. They glow an eerie shade of yellow. Almost the same color as the full moon."

"You go from wishing me to kill you to speaking of my eyes?" Remus laughed sardonically before shoving the Slytherin away, sending the blonde sprawling to the floor. Remus stood over him, eyes glittering, the pupils slits. Remus could _smell_ the fear oozing from the boy in a melodious scent that sent shivers through his spine. The wolf delighted in the fact that the human as terrified. Remus cocked his head the side, wary of the admiration in Draco's eyes, wary of the wolf's triumphant bark as he forced the wolf into submission. "…This isn't a life worth living, Draco."

"Saw through me, did you?" Draco laid on the floor and stared at the ceiling. "What kind of life do I have, Lupin? I'm an outcast from my own family and my friends would never be caught near me again because of last year's fiasco. They would rather sell me to Voldemort then be true friends," Draco sighed, holding his hand in front of his face, seeing the scars. "I know I'm not completely healed. There's still a few more treatments that I'll have to endure before I'm whole again. But they can't fix what's in here," Draco touched his head.

"And you think that by becoming a werewolf, that solves all your problems, right?" Remus shook his head. "Because of the power I have? Or the long life? What appeals to you?"

"Because you can take all the vengeance you want and never have to worry about the consequences. You can _fight_ without relying on a wand. You have brute strength! God, you could rip Voldemort's head off his fucking shoulders!"

"And if surrender to that kind of evil, then the wolf has truly won and I will never be human again," Remus angrily sank onto one of the chairs, eyeing the empty collection of potion bottles in a curio cabinet. "Without Snape here, I don't have access to any Wolfsbane. That means that come tomorrow night, I'm no longer a tamed werewolf. I haven't been dangerous to anyone since your third year, when Snape started making me the potion. I don't know of anyone else that can do it. It's complex and completely confuses me each time I read over his notes."

"…I'm not a dolt when it comes to Potions," Draco remarked quietly, sitting up on his elbows to gaze at Remus. "Severus always told me that I would surpass him when it comes to Potions. I could try," Draco offered.

"And what's your asking price? To become a freak like me?"

"A monster, yes. A freak, no. But I'm not asking a price," Draco grinned, sticking his had out towards Lupin, "At least, not yet. What do you say? You have nothing to lose and everything to gain."

_I'll lose my morals, what's left of them, by agreeing to this_, Remus pursed his lips, staring at the proffered hand. Should Draco actually concoct the difficult potion then Remus would owe him but he couldn't turn Draco into a werewolf. That had always been his greatest trepidation as child; that he would unknowingly cause his friends to become monsters like himself. "I will pay any price as long as it doesn't involve me turning you into a werewolf."

"Agreed."

Remus had an uncanny feeling that he had just made a deal with the Devil.

* * *

"So."

"So?"

"I think that, well, Malfoy's going to be avoiding us. Well, me. Um, I don't really know to handle this situation," Harry scowled, flicking a marshmallow at Tom's grin. "I mean, right now, there aren't many students remaining behind at Hogwarts except for, me, you, and Malfoy. Ron's going home to the Burrow and Hermione's going to her parents. The rest of the students left yesterday."

"And you think that Draco might, what? Seduce me in some dark corridor?"

"Ugh," Harry shuddered, "Don't even mention that again. Hey, he might be attractive but that mouth of his takes it away. _Anyways_, as I was saying before you thrust such disgusting imagery on me, I think we should try and include Malfoy. I'm not saying I like the bastard, I just don't want to see you upset because you can't play mentor to him."

"Play doctor? Okay," Tom laughed as he ducked to the other side, avoiding Harry's steaming mug of hot chocolate. "I know, I know," he said soothingly, hands in front of himself in mock defense. "Look, I appreciate you being so nice about it all but if he makes you uncomfortable, then I can meet him in private."

"Malfoy's not really on any side now and I'd much rather have him on the right side, if you catch my drift. I don't want him going back to Voldemort."

"I don't think that's possible," Tom muttered, "He's as good as dead if Voldemort gets a hold of him. And the only reason I think that he ever agreed to fight on the Light is because of his vendetta against Voldemort. I don't think he's weak, Harry. Far from it. If you could sense the amount of power that Draco has, you'd probably think twice about goading him into a fight."

"How come you can sense power?" Harry queried, sliding a hand underneath the table to give Tom's thigh a squeeze. "Are you half dark creature or something? I only know of one person that can sense power and that's Remus. He can actually _smell_ it."

"I don't know. It's just something I've always been able to do."

"Tom! Harry! We're leaving!" Hermione and Ron called as they ran into the Common Room. "Mum's expecting me home in an hour and I think Ron has less time to be at the Burrow."

"Already?" Harry pouted, listlessly setting his mug onto one of the tables. "I thought you might stay here with us and be lonely together."

"Yeah right. Mum would skin me alive. She's pretty mad at you for not coming home," Ron glared at his friend, "I had to make up some grand excuse so I wouldn't have to tell her about him," he nodded towards Tom. "Mum wouldn't be too happy with you if she knew you were bedding Tom fucking Riddle."

"She'll have to be told eventually," Hermione said, wrapping a comforting hand around Harry's back. "I just don't want to be anywhere around you two when the bomb finally drops."  
"Thanks, Hermione," Harry said dryly. "I don't think it'll be _that_ bad."

"Then you obviously don't know Mum. But, Mione's right. We should get going. Ginny already went ahead. She's still not too happy with you," Ron pointedly glowered at Harry. "But she'll get over it. Don't worry, I'll come back loaded with presents from the family."

Harry embraced both his best friends, surprised that three complete opposites were so close, that they had been his rocks throughout his school life, through all the toughness and misery, through all the laughter and joy, through all the heartaches and pain. He buried his head into Hermione's bushy hair, ignoring the tears welling in his eyes as he chanted to himself that he would not cry. Somewhere in him, he had the feeling that this could quite possibly be the last time he ever saw his friends again. That Voldemort could attack at any given moment and Harry would have to face him, alone, in the end. Godric's Hollow might be his final resting place; his tomb.

"Harry…don't let it bother you," Hermione said knowingly, fingers wiping a few strewn tears from Harry's cheeks. "As soon as we hear any word that Voldemort's attacked or that he's made his threat real by announcing his arrival at Godric's Hollow, we'll be here. You won't be alone in this. We promised each other a long time ago that we would always be there for one another. I intend to keep that promise."

"Me too, mate," Ron grinned, "I think I have some dust in my eyes," he dabbed at his blue eyes angrily. "Stupid dust. Well, Tom, take good care of my best buddy while I'm gone, alright?" Ron shook the older wizard's hand, rolling his eyes at Hermione attached herself to Tom and pulled him into a bone crushing hug. "That's Hermione."

"Be careful." Hermione dropped her voice to a whisper. "_No matter what happens, Tom, you have to protect him. You have to be there to save him, if not from Voldemort, then from himself. Swear to me, that he will come to no harm when in your care."_

_"I swear it_," Tom answered hastily, withdrawing from the hold, "Happy Christmas. We'll be here when you come back."

"You better be. I better not come back and find that the two of you have eloped," Ron scowled.

"Ooh, how romantic!" Hermione gushed as Ron ushered her towards the fireplace. "Merry Christmas!" she shouted as she disappeared into the flames. Ron was the next as he dipped his fingers in Floo Powder. "See you later!"

Harry was silent for several minutes after Ron and Hermione vanished into the hearth. "You know, I thought I'd be happy to have some alone time with you but now I'm not so sure. What if…what if this is the last time that I ever see them? I mean, he could attack any second now. Everyone's off with their families and I'm here, with no one but you. It's sad."

"I'm sorry I'm so depressing," Tom snapped, heading towards the portrait, nearly being smacked in the face with it as it swung open to reveal Lupin. "Remus? What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be, you know, somewhere contained?"

"Draco's made me Wolfsbane so I'm perfectly fine to be in the Forbidden Forest," Remus was grinning like a loon, "Can you believe it? He mastered Wolfsbane! I thought I was a lost cause without it."

"That's awesome, Remus," Harry smiled, having forgotten that Remus, and all the teachers, would be remaining behind at Hogwarts. "But what'd you have to do to convince Malfoy to make you your potion?"

"Well…" Remus shuffled his feet, fingers beckoning an unseen figure from the portrait tunnel. "He's requested that I make you allow him to remain here with you two while the rest of the students are at home."

"_That_ was his pay off?" Harry's jaw dropped. "Wow. He's more simple minded then I thought."

"Simple minded?" Draco snarled, hands on his hips as he stared down his nose levelly at Harry. "I'd like to see you sleep in those drafty old dungeons that not even a fucking spell can fix! Honestly, I can't believe you had me sleep there last night!" he scowled at Remus. "Torture, pure torture."

"You might as well bunk with me and Harry in my rooms," Tom said, shrugging, ignoring the piercing glare in his back as he led Draco towards the stairs. Yes, he was definitely going to catch Hell for that. "…I think you've made Remus eternally grateful for making Wolfsbane for him. And…and I'm sorry for never telling you about myself and Harry. I know you must hate me for leaving such an important detail absent from any of our conversations."

"…I don't hate you. I just don't know what you see in him, that's all. He's annoying, not very handsome, dumb as a Squib when it comes to academics. All he has going for him is his stupid prophecy and his Quidditch skills."

"That's an opinion of a person that has never taken the opportunity to know how extremely wonderful Harry Potter is," Tom opened the door to his rooms. "And I'm sure the same can be said for Harry regarding you. I see an intelligent, powerful, beautiful young man with his entire future ahead of him."

Draco paused in inspecting the lavish room. "Did you just call me beautiful?"

"What else am I supposed to call you? You're too prissy to be handsome."

Arms crossed in front of his chest, Draco said, "Prissy?"

"Prissy." Tom repeated. "Draco, I want to be your friend but I can't ignore Harry at the same time. He means more to me then I ever thought possible. Can't you try to be civil?"

"…You saved my life, Tom, whether you realize it or not. I knew you were there with me. I could hear you talking to me. You lent me your strength and because of that, I'm willing to be friendly towards Potter if for no other reason then to be _your_ friend."  
"I swear, if you two are doing more then talking, I'll castrate you both!" Harry shouted, coming inside with his hands covering his eyes, though both green eyes could be clearly seen between his fingers "Put your dicks away!" He made a cross with his fingers.

"…I think they're clothed," Remus dryly said, leaning against the frame of the door, meeting Draco's eyes before glancing in another direction. "Harry. You aren't eleven. Stop behaving like one."

"…Yeah, I guess I should act more my age. So, Tom, you wanna go shag?" he waggled his brows suggestively. "Is that better, Remus?" he asked, laughing at Lupin's disgusted expression. "I know, save it for the bedroom. Remus, uh, it's getting kinda late," Harry pointed towards the darkening sky. "Don't you think you should be, you know, out in the Forbidden Forest?"

"I only wanted to bring Draco here before I went out there. Well, I will see you boys in the morning."

"You know, I _am_ an unregistered Animagus," Draco smirked, "Or did you not notice?"

"I noticed a certain…_scent_ to you," Remus admitted, eyes roving the form of the younger wizard, ignoring the _smells_ that emitted from Draco. The exotic, spicy _perfume_ that called to him as much as Sirius' earthen odor had all those years ago. "An illegal Animagus."

"When I was…was being coached on my duties as a loyal Death Eater, Severus taught me how to become an Animagus should the need call for it. I never used it. So this is more or less a test for myself, to find out if all that constant studying and practicing actually paid off."

"And get ripped to shreds if it doesn't!?"

"You're a tame wolf," Draco arched an elegant brow, "Or did you forget about the Wolfsbane."

"So you had this planned?"

"Yes," Draco simply said, shrugging a shoulder. "My Animagus form is a white fox. Therefore, I can easily keep up with you and offer you the companionship you've missed since your mutt passed on. Do you accept?"

"…Do I have any choice?" Remus muttered underneath his breath. "Fine. . Don't even give me that awful look, Harry," he wagged a finger at younger man, "I'm not going to become a murderer. At least, not this night," he said darkly. He shook his head, casting _those_ thoughts aside as he turned towards Draco. "I'm only agreeing with this because it keeps the wolf from becoming bored and searching for some other form of entertainment."

"And you say that I'm using you," Draco grumbled, already at the door and descending the stairs.

Remus watched the lithe blonde, sighing. "Honestly, I don't understand him. He's a complex puzzle that requires much more solving then I have in me to be patient for. I want to help him but…I don't know what I'll have to sacrifice."

"Remus?"

"Never mind me," Remus laughed, cheeks a faint pink. "I'll see you in the morning. Goodnight."

Harry bit his bottom lip, watching the two leave the Common Room thoughtfully. "…If Malfoy can turn into an Animagus, I wonder what else he was taught during his _training_."

"Why don't you tell me what's actually on your mind?"

"…I don't think I like the idea of Remus getting close to Malfoy. I know how Malfoy can be, especially when he sees something that he wants. He'll stop at nothing to obtain it. I'm just worried, I guess, about Malfoy _seducing_ Remus and breaking his heart in the process."

Tom laughed. "What makes you even think that Draco's gay?"

"I didn't say gay. Malfoy will bed anything that walks. Trust me. I know his reputation as the Slytherin Whore. Ugh. I don't want to talk about him or his sex life. I want him to leave Remus out of his fucked up plans. Tom. What if…what if something happens while everyone's with their families?"

"Then it happens. I'm here to fight this with you to the very last second. The Order's here, the teachers are remaining behind. I think you're worrying over nothing."

Shrugging, Harry grasped Tom's hand. "There's more then being paranoid because of _his_ threat. There's a feeling, inside, that's warning me. I feel it every day. An impending doom and the promise of death. Like someone's walking over my grave. My scar hasn't bothered me since…since that day. I think he's on the move. I think that it's going to happen soon."

Staring into Harry's eyes, Tom had to believe him. He cupped Harry's face in his hands and rubbed his thumbs over Harry's lips. "Then we face it. Harry, have you lost all that strength and courage that you came with? What happened to that boy that held his own? That wasn't afraid to go up against anything? That wasn't terrified by the big bad wolf, Tom Riddle? That showed a dark soul the lights of love?"

"Tom…"

"You saved my life, Harry, in more ways then I think you'll _ever_ know. And it's because of that, that I vow to lay my own life down in order to keep yours whole. That I would give all to see you smile again."

"I smile all the time."

"Those are fake. I know you by now, Harry Potter. And if seeing you smile and mean it, one more, means destroying the bastard that robbed you of all that beauty, then I will. I don't know what it may do to me, taking a life that's essentially me, but I don't care. I want you to _live_."

"And I- ARGH!" Harry fell to the floor, hand flying to his forehead, covering his scar as blood coated his fingers. He writhed like a tortured being. Tears glistened on his face. Tom was on his knees, locking Harry's thrashing body with his own. He couldn't hear the nature of the words so obviously being spoken in Harry's mind-the vacant gleam in Harry's green eyes were evident to that-and he felt utterly powerless as his beloved, his best friend, fought a demon in his head.

_The time has come, Harry Potter. The time for our long awaited battle._

_No!_ Harry screamed mentally through the telepathic link they had always shared.

_NOW!_

All went black as the world fell out from underneath them.

_**Fin**_

Ah, that's it for chapter 22. I'm estimating maybe three more (or less) with an epilogue. I know exactly where I want this going. Oh, and please review. It makes me feel like people are still interested in this story. Thanks for all the support.


	23. Chapter twenty three

Title: On This Cross

Disclaimers: Definitely not mine. All belongs to J.K. Rowlings. I'm just perverting them.

_**Chapter 23**_

Consciousness floated from fantasy to reality as his mind returned to wakefulness. Green eyes snapped open immediately, taking in the surrounding, suppressing the urge to inquire for Tom. There were no rays of moon light illuminating the dense forest to provide his eyes aide as he vainly attempted to _see_. There was nothing, no signs of Death Eaters, or Voldemort, or of Tom. Frowning, he rose to his feet shakily.

This wasn't what he'd been imagining. The second he'd felt the pull-almost like using a Port Key-he'd come to the conclusion that he would be face to face with Voldemort the second he came to. Not…lost in an unknown forest in a strange land more then likely surrounded by Death Eaters. An owl hooted and Harry nearly sent a curse at the unfortunate bird had a figure not darted in his path. "Tom!" he hissed, spell forgotten, "I could have fucking killed you. Where have you been?"

Tom's eyes glittered eerily in the darkness, reminding Harry hauntingly of Death Lanterns. "This is the Black Forest. It has been rumored for centuries to be the feeding ground of evil spirits. It doesn't surprise me that Voldemort's taken an interest in this place."

Harry shuddered as he shifted closer to Tom. "A feeding ground?" he echoed, not exactly keen on the idea of being surrounded by ghosts, especially demonic ones. "Why would he bring us here? And why are we alone? I don't understand. It's not his game."

"But it is," Tom answered, "This _is_ a game to him, Harry. This is like cat and mouse of a larger scale. We're not alone," his whispered voice was calm and collected, nothing like how Harry felt. "They're here, watching us. They only expected you. Not me."

"What?"

"They have yet to determine _what_ I am. They know that I'm to be reckoned with and not be treated as if I were some ignorant bumpkin. They can sense the power inside of me. And I think that Voldemort's confused by the sudden appearance of a being that looks so familiar to him. He can't pinpoint my origin."

"You mean, he's forgotten who he used to be?"

"Yes. It's to our advantage. Come on, we're in the open. Stay on guard."

Harry did as he was bidden and followed behind Tom, the other boy's feet making no noise as he stealthily meandered through the dale towards the inner guts of the forest. His eyes darted towards every sound that disturbed the creepy silence of the woods. Strange creatures met his gaze with their bulbous eyes, never blinking. Above, a bird cawed, sending shivers down Harry's spine. Didn't raven's call as death approached?

"They won't attack us. Not yet. That buys us some time."

"Time to do what? Say our last rites?"

"I'm not Catholic," Tom responded, holding a branch aside to let Harry pass through a tangle of tree limbs. Harry caught himself before he stumbled on a tree root that reminded him of a skeleton. "I'm not sure if I can take them all, Harry. You have to run and find help. Do something. Just don't be captured," Tom ignored the coldness that numbed him to the bones as he sensed the figures gaining on them.

"I don't think I want you talking like that."

"…There're at least twenty and Voldemort."

"How do you know?"

Tom drew Harry into a crushing embrace. "Run. Now." Harry could feel warm drops of water on his shoulder and he thought that it was raining but the rest of his body was dry. That meant that Tom was--

"But-"

"NOW!" Tom yelled, a shield encasing them as several spells bounced off, "Harry. GO!" he demanded, "This barrier won't last long and I can't defend us with it up. Please, Harry, you have to find help. You have to live!"

"But I can't leave you. I can't just let you be killed or…or…"

"And you'd rather the only hope for the world be taken because of your selfishness?! I'm no one, Harry. But I can at least keep you alive and I can finally repent for all the sins I've committed. Maybe my soul will find you in Heaven, instead of Hell."

Tears freely coursed his face as he stared at Tom, feet planted to the grass as if he were one of the trees in the forest, unable to move. His sole existence for living was-he swallowed, not wanting this to be real, not wanting his dreams to be demolished. "Harry," Tom said softly, smiling back at him, "I love you. Never forget that and I'll live on." A hex broke through the barrier, slamming against Tom's chest.

"Tom! TOM!" Harry sobbed, closing his eyes as he turned on his back and ran, ran as fast as his feet could carry him, as fast as his heaving lungs would permit. He ran until the sun was already coming up over the distant mountains. He ran, and ran, until he forgot that he was alive, until he collapsed into a heap in a dead faint.

* * *

Tom Riddle never imagined he'd sacrifice himself for another, that he'd willingly do so. But when he no longer heard Harry's footfalls, he removed the shield that had been his only means of protection until now. Tom glanced at the robed figures that had landed only a few meters in front of him. There were three but he could see the other seventeen circling the perimeter, like great winged night haunts. The trio parted, revealing the face of the man that he would have become.

"I see that Harry has escaped," the man tutted, "That will not do at all." Tom could see the red, serpent eyes scrutinizing him, could see the slits that were his nostrils flaring as he released an indignant huff. "And this is the boy that aided him. To think…" he murmured, not finishing his sentence, a browless ridge arching.

"My Lord, what do you wish us to do with the boy?" a man's voice, a honeyed drawl, interrupted Voldemort's musings.

Tom snarled, "Fight me! Or are you terrified by a mere boy?" he mocked, raising his wand to issue forth a spell but before he could even speak the words, his hand was frozen in mid-air and his mouth silenced. Intrigued, Tom peered at Voldemort. Voldemort's training in the Black Arts had obviously been rewarding if he could cast a body bind and silencing spell without using a wand or speech.

"The boy has a mouth on him that would make Potter seem like an angel," another of the three leaders, most likely Voldemort's generals, spoke scathingly, voice dripping with acid.

"Ooh, let me play with him, please?" a woman's voice cooed.

"Enough!" Voldemort commanded, crossing the distance between Tom and himself, closing the gap. "You remind me…of someone. I can _smell_ the power you have. You would be useful to me. Useful in my cause. You only have to surrender to me and I will spare your life. And…and I will spare Potter's life. For now."

Tom felt his body released from its paralysis and he kept his blanch to himself as the tip of Voldemort's wand touched his face. "Yes, you most definitely remind me of someone." The wand lowered to his chest. "You will become a Death Eater and follow every order that I so desire. In exchange, Potter will be spared for the time that remains until I decide to kill him."

He knew he would do absolutely anything to keep Harry safe but losing his identity, his soul, to a monster had not been in his deck of cards. He would rather die then become a slave to Voldemort. But…he knew the Death Eaters would find Harry and kill him before dawn. He closed his eyes, sighing. Harry would return to Hogwarts and build an army to fight Voldemort. Harry would be victorious. "I accept," he said in a quiet voice, completely void of emotion, as he met the triumphant eyes of Voldemort.

"I had a sixth sense telling me that you would not refuse me. Potter means more to you then as a friend. How sickeningly sweet. Severus, take him back to the base. And I would make sure that he does not escape or else you will not be pleased with the punishment."

"Yes, my lord."

"You're letting Potter GO?!!" the woman screeched, "This is your chance!"

"Do not tell me what to do!" Voldemort snarled, rounding on the woman with a spell, "I have chances to destroy Potter. Many more to come, much more celebrated then this. I want his death to be in front of his followers, in front of the people he chooses to protect."

"And the boy's wand?" Severus, Tom presumed was the Death Eater's name, asked, indicating the weapon in his hand.

"Let him keep it. I suspect he's intelligent enough to not do anything foolish."

Severus roughly grabbed Tom by the arm, "_I would suggest you do all that he requires of you if you want to survive this,"_ he whispered in Tom's ear, _"Because he will brand you with the Dark Mark and make you one of us. And then nothing escapes him."_

The familiar sensation of apparating tugged him from the abysmal forest and from those last declarations of love.

* * *

The base was in fact a rickety old farmhouse that was nestled among decaying fields ands bare pastures. A long dirt road went on for miles and miles, no doubt the home being the only human signs of civilization in this part of Europe. But any indication of exactly where the base _was_; that would have to wait until morning when the entire lands weren't covered in darkness. To any normal person the house would have appeared to be abandoned. But Tom Riddle knew differently.

"You have sold your soul," the man stated from behind him, Tom's hand instinctively reaching for his wand. "That won't do you any good, fool," he snarled, removing the cowl of his black robe. "You should have escaped when you had the chance. You and Potter could have lost us."

"One would think with that talk that you aren't entirely on Voldemort's side," Tom commented idly, green eyes sliding to glance at the man, one black brow rising as he took in Severus' appearance. How…odd that he held a resemblance to Septimus. Though, with nearly fifty decades having passed, he could have quite possibly been related to Septimus…

"Where's Potter?" Severus asked, ignoring Tom's insinuation of betrayal. "He couldn't have gotten very far. I think I should have time to find him and get him to safety. What?" Severus scoffed. "You honestly expected Voldemort to uphold his end of the bargain? No, Tom Riddle, Voldemort _never_ keeps his word."

"You know who I am," Tom crossed his arms in front of his chest, cocking his head to the side to study the older man. Yes, there were similarities in Septimus and Severus though Severus could hardly measure to the degree of physical perfection that Septimus was, had been. No, Tom could see that years of inner strife had taken their toll on the man. Perhaps, once, he'd been exquisite. An exotic beauty with long, silken black hair and passionate, knowledgeable dark eyes that smoldered. "Why doesn't Voldemort see it?"

"I'm curious, Riddle, how you came to be here," Severus scrutinized the devastatingly beautiful youth in front of him. He had seen the last inklings of humanity in Tom Riddle during his first reign of terror, when he'd been only a boy caught up in the whirlwind of dark romance that Voldemort represented. There had been some remainders of the handsome young man in front of him still residing within in Voldemort. But that had faded as Voldemort's mind began to snap, as his last remnants of mortality were destroyed… "Unless Potter meddled in affairs that he shouldn't have."

"Maybe," Tom answered elusively. He knew that Severus may be an ally during his incarceration but to what extent that he could trust the man had not yet been revealed. "Is Harry in danger?" he decided another approach, another line of questions that he needed answered.

"Perhaps."

The door burst open to reveal Voldemort and the other two generals. Tom's stomach sank as he noticed that the three of them were alone. The remaining Death Eaters were not to be seen. _Oh Harry_. Tom schooled his features to one of detached blankness. He'd become apt at manipulating his eyes and face to hide any emotions that were raging inside of him over the years and while it hindered his relationship with Harry at times, he was grateful to the bastards that had made him become a cold son of a bitch in the first place.

"You surprise me, boy," Voldemort smirked with bloodless lips. "Men would have been cowering at my feet begging for me to spare their lives, to have me release them. Impressive." He tilted the boy's chin with a hand. "There's no fear in you."

"Why should I fear death?" Tom countered in a lazy voice, meeting those blood red eyes of Voldemort, knowing that he was staring into the face that would have eventually become his own. And those scarlet eyes of his… It was no wonder Harry had been terrified…

"Ah. I see," Voldemort nodded, the hand that had been on Tom's chin dropped to wrap around his throat. Still, no terror. Not even a flinch. "You are either very brave or very stupid," he remarked, fingers digging into the creamy flesh of Tom's throat. The skin was already darkening from the pressure. A slight hitch in the boy's breathing was the only indication that he was harming the boy. The impassive exterior remained in tact.

Tom fought the urge to fight, to grasp at the hand around his throat, to make some feeble attempt to free himself from Voldemort's deadly clutches. Sparks of light flashed in front of his eyes as a dizzying blackness seeped into his mind. Only a few more minutes of this and he would be able to surrender to the numbness of death, to the solitude of perpetual sleep. But Harry… He wanted to survive for Harry. He was the Earth and Harry his Sun, and he revolved around him. Constantly. He had never in his life imagined that he would have been perfectly content to be centered around one single being.

Suddenly he was released as he bonelessly fell to the floor. He choked on his own air as he struggled to regain his breath. He coughed and slowly raised his eyes to look at the Dark Lord. Voldemort was staring through one of the open windows, eyes unfocused and glazed. Tom glanced at Severus. The older wizard's brows were drawn in obvious puzzlement at Voldemort's actions. Voldemort peered at Tom, an unrecognizable gleam in those burgundy eyes of his. And then, he was gone.

"Well, Severus, since you seem to be our lord's favorite at the moment," the blonde man leered suggestively at Severus, "What exactly are you planning to do with _him_?" he aimed a kick at the youth on the floor, thought better of it, and settled with aiming a curse at him instead. One that was deflected by Severus. "Are you protecting him?"

"I'm keeping you protected, Lucius. If the Dark Lord returns and finds that he's been harmed, I hardly think he'd be too pleased. Our master's toy is to be unblemished," Severus met the confused green eyes. _In time, Riddle…_ "I'm taking him upstairs to be kept locked up."

"Aww, but I wanted to play with him," Bellatrix pouted, kneeling in front of Tom. "He's very pretty. Maybe even prettier then Potter. I do enjoy the pretty ones," she gazed imploringly up at Lucius. "Just a little bit?"

"I have to side with Snape on this one," Malfoy snarled, "I would rather not risk our master's wrath because his toy has been disturbed."

Tom rose shakily to his feet, leaning on Severus for support. Well, at least that answered a few concerns he had. He waited until they were clear out of hearing range before whispering softly in Snape's ear, "You meant what you said. That I'm Voldemort's toy."

"Not in the essence that you seem to be assuming. You won't be having to fuck yourself, if that's what your afraid of," Severus said dryly, "I think that he's made the connection. And he isn't thrilled with it."

Tom rubbed his hand against the bruises on his throat gingerly. "He means to defile me with his magic. With the magic that I sought for years and years. He knows it's a temptation. To have omnipotent power. He knows that I am him. And that, in his brilliant mind, he's deduced that the same temptations that bewitch him are the same that will ensnare me into his game."

"But are you aren't him, are you?" Severus asked, opening one of the doors.

"A fact that I have only recently begun to see. With help," Tom gratefully sank onto the small mattress tossed onto the middle of the floor. He sighed, fingers trailing the tender region of his throat were Voldemort had nearly ended his life. "What's to become of me?"

Severus grabbed a thin, fraying blanket from the wardrobe in one of the corners of the room. He used his magic to thicken the material considerably. "He's interested in how you came to be here. He's even more interested in manipulating you into becoming like him. He knows that he could be unstoppable if he has command of you. Imagine, a world with not one but two dark lords. Both with the same powers."

"Then there would be no hope for anyone," Tom supplied the outcome, "The world would be in ruins. I…I'm not positive if I can stop this. I spent too many years in the shadows."

"You have to try. _He_ wouldn't want you to give up so easily."

Tom had no reason to ask whom the he was that Snape referred to. "I have much to think about and I'm hardly optimistic that I will be rescued. Will you protect Harry?"

"Riddle…" Severus wrapped the blanket around Tom's shoulders. "Why would you want to risk everything?"

"Because he's worth it. And because I may the only one that can stop Voldemort before he takes what's left of my humanity and molds it into his own image of twisted perfection. I have to do this. I have to gain his good graces so that when the day comes for Harry to fight him…he won't expect me to turn on him."

"And what if it's too late? What if you lose your battle?"

"Then I want to be killed."

"He won't accept that. He'll save you."

Tom rolled onto his side. "I want to be alone." The room was silent, too silent, as the door closed quietly behind Severus. He could hear his heart thumping painfully loud in his chest as he vainly attempted to calm his racing pulse. This was the last waltz for him. He swallowed the lump in his throat. Would Harry ever forgive him for his disgraceful actions? Would he understand, in the end, on the infamous day that Potter and Voldemort finally clashed, as to _why_ he was on the wrong side? Why he was beside of Voldemort? Why he was fighting against those he'd deemed friends?

Sniffling, he angrily buried his face against the mattress. This was not the time to be sentimental. Come tomorrow he would have to be mentally alert. He'd be engaging in a game that was dangerous. He'd be sacrificing the love that he'd come to cherish in the past several months in order to keep that same love unsullied. Fuck, he would be dancing to the Devil's flute in the morning. Maybe it there was actually a God out there he'd bestow mercy upon him.

_Fin_

I wasn't going to delve into Tom's stay with Voldemort but I decided to do it anyways. It'll unfortunately make for more chapters then I'd intended. Leave me a review please!!! : - )

_Peace, Love, and Doughnuts,_

_Shiny Ryuichi Sakuma_


	24. Chapter 24

Title: On This Cross

Disclaimers: Definitely not mine. All belongs to J.K. Rowlings. I'm just perverting them.

_**I'm never gonna dance again,  
Guilty feet have got no rhythm  
Though its easy to pretend,  
I know you're not a fool  
I should have no better than to cheat a friend,  
And waste the chance that Id been given.  
So I'm never gonna dance again,  
The way I danced with you**_

**_-Seether, Careless Whisper_**

_**Chapter 24**_

_*******_

"He's alive!"

Slowly, oh so achingly slowly, Harry Potter opened his eyes, blearily looking around him at blurry faces hovering over him. He was alive? He wasn't dead? Or hadn't been caught by Voldemort? Someone-it looked like Hermione judging from the messy brown blob that descended on him-placed his glasses on his nose. "What's going on?" he croaked, swallowing, his throat dry and scratchy.

"You're at Grimmauld Place," Lupin said, coming to sit beside him as he offered Harry a glass of water that he greedily gulped down. He winced as the cold liquid sloshed against his burning esophagus. "I found you a few days ago in Germany while I was…on my dark creature rounds."

"Tom? Where's Tom? He was caught! I have to go. I have to find him. I have to-" he started to get up but was roughly shoved back down by Draco, the blonde effectively halting any further movement. "Draco, he's out there. He's probably dead. And Voldemort-oh God-Voldemort has him, doesn't he?" Harry groaned, "Remus, did you find him?" he gazed pleadingly at Remus, wanting the older man to tell him lies, anything but the actual truth. The truth was too much for him to bear, too much for him to even comprehend at the moment. That Tom was gone…

"Harry, you aren't in any condition to do anything." Hermione smoothed back his hair with a gentle hand. "You could have died if Professor Lupin hadn't come across you. Harry…what happened? Where did you go? We don't really know anything."

"Where's Ron? Where's everyone else? Why is just the three of you?"

"They're at the Burrow. We figured that Grimmauld would be a better location for you considering how well protected it is. Madam Pomfrey's been checking on you periodically," Remus said, pressing the back of his hand against Harry's forehead. "Good, your fever broke."

"You're avoiding my question," Harry scowled, looking from Hermione to Lupin to Draco.

"They don't want me there," Draco snarled, crossing his arms in front of his chest, "There, does that answer it for you? They haven't forgotten what I did last year and are less then receptive of me in their home. So, I've been here, ever since. Lupin has been adamant that I remain here because of the wards. Apparently this place is safer then Hogwarts," he drawled dryly, lazily raising those pale blue eyes of his to settle mockingly on Lupin.

"Draco, we discussed this and it was decided," Remus's tone left no room for argument. "Harry, I know you're exhausted and I know that you're in pain but we need to know everything about where you've been."

Harry's handsome face paled. "I…we were just talking and then my scar, it was bleeding. We….we were taken away to some place that Tom called the Black Forest." Recognition dawned on Lupin's countenance. "No one was there at first but then Death Eaters were everywhere. And Tom…Tom put up a shield but there were too many spells going on for him. He made me run. He made me abandon him," the tears couldn't come; he'd cried too many as he'd blindly taken off into the night, desperate to find salvation in an unknown land.

"It's alright. Hermione, would you give Harry some Dreamless Sleep potion?" Remus leaned down and tenderly pressed his lips to the boy's head. "It'll be fine, Harry. We'll get Tom back. I swear it."

"Okay," Harry's voice was tiny, reminding Remus of the thirteen year old child that he'd met years ago. Harry had been forced to mature too fast; he should have been only interested in girls (or boys), and Quidditch, and all those other adolescent rites of passages. Not having to focus on defeating the greatest Dark wizard that had ever existed.

"You know where the Black Forest is, don't you?" Draco asked as soon as Harry slipped off to sleep again, the two of them standing just outside Harry's door, Hermione's constant vigil not wavering despite that she hadn't slept properly in four days. "And you've heard rumors. About Tom."

"Does my face really give all of that away?" Remus smiled wanly, "Or are you just that apt at reading me, Draco?"

"I've spent time with you," Draco shrugged, not elaborating.

"The Black Forest is in Germany. It's been rumored to be the grounds of evil spirits. If that's the case, then it's possible that our search for Voldemort has been considerably narrowed to one region. Harry had to have ran until he was so exhausted that he couldn't move anymore, that his lungs were on the verge of collapsing. I found him nearly fifty miles from the Black Forest."

"Good God," Draco murmured, "What drove him on? That kind of torture to his body should have had him six feet under right now."

"Harry's always been a stubborn boy. And it's possible that Tom's last wishes for Harry to survive kept him going until he no longer could."

"Harry lives, eats, and breathes Tom. If anything were to happen to Tom, well, I wouldn't want to be Voldemort when Harry gets through with him. What of Tom? What have you heard?"

"Nothing much. Just that there're rumors circulating within the Death Eater ranks that Voldemort's found a suitable heir. That can only mean one person. I just wonder if Tom's playing to Voldemort's ignorance or if…if somehow Voldemort's found a way to control Tom."

"Never!" Draco snapped, "Tom isn't some simple minded weakling. He's a powerful wizard that…that is hopelessly in love with Harry Potter. And just like Tom is Harry's strength, Harry is Tom's. It goes both ways," he said bitterly, glancing at the sleeping figure on the bed.

"…You love him, don't you?" Draco's eyes widened marginally and his lips parted but no words came forth. "It isn't that difficult to tell, Draco. And it must be very painful to know that your love will always be unrequited."

"I'm not discussing this with you," Draco hissed, "My love life is certainly not any business of yours and I would appreciate if you would never speak of my feelings towards Tom Riddle."

"My apologies, Mister Malfoy," Remus said coolly, "I hadn't meant to go outside certain boundaries that exist between us. But whether you like or not, the wolf _has_ accepted you as part of the pack. That means that _I_ have as well," he announced, on the verge of turning and leaving, not caring that it made him seem immature but a firm, steady hand reached forward and grabbed his arm. "What?"

"You're about the only ally that I have other then Tom and Potter," Draco said quietly, "And I'm sorry for my behavior. But I was raised on the belief that emotions are weak. And that I should under no circumstances betray my feelings to anyone, not even my own family. It's just ironic that the man that I'm becoming close to is nearly twice my age and a dark creature as well. My parents would probably disown me."

Remus's ire disappeared as he stared into those beautiful stormy blue eyes, fraught with underlying fear. Was it fear of the unknown that filled Draco's heart with dread? Fear for Tom or maybe…fear for himself. "Then they're obviously mental if they don't see how special you are." A rare, true smile curled Draco's lips. Remus had to wonder what lay beneath all the layers that Draco had curled himself. Beneath all the sarcasm, anger, and arrogance there was a young man with a soul that shone like the brightest star in the darkest heavens. "I mean it, Draco." ."

"If I didn't know any better, I would assume that you're coming onto me," Draco chuckled, smirking, "And that couldn't be possible, now could it, _Remus_?" he purred, slinking towards the older man like a panther, his eyes aglow with challenge.

"I…I'm not sure what-"

Draco laughed, "You're not a moron, Lupin. I would think that my intentions are extremely obvious." He glanced at the open door leading into Potter's room. "Or would you rather take this to a more private location? Though, I suspect that Granger and Potter will be none the wiser to our little activities."

"You're not thinking clearly, Draco," Remus snapped, trying desperately to ignore his reaction to being pressed against the wall with a hard, young, willing body agonizingly close. He hadn't had any relations in years; with the war and Sirius's death, it just hadn't been on his list of top priorities.

"Oh, but I am," Draco flashed Remus a feral grin, grabbing onto Remus's slender waist with one hand and fisting his fingers into the man's chestnut brown hair, slamming their mouths together roughly. Draco knew this was ultimately wrong; he was playing on the fact that Remus was starving for affection just as much as Draco himself was. He was using Remus for his own desires but he wondered, how was it this easy to forget about Tom Riddle when he was in love with him?

Groaning into the passionate kiss, Draco felt a hesitant tongue flickering against his bottom lip; he was too happy to oblige. The hand that was on Remus's waist glided towards the door handle behind them and Draco thanked every god that the door was unlocked as they stumbled into the dark room. "Don't hold back," he breathed, grinding against Remus's groin heatedly. "I won't break."

"You're not even fully healed," Remus whispered, torn between throwing the boy to the floor and taking him, and ending this immediately. With his kiss swollen lips and mussed blonde hair, he was a delicious vision to behold to a man that hadn't allowed himself any sexual interactions for over three years.

"This is all that matters," Draco grabbed Lupin's hand and shoved it against the tent in his trousers. "Fuck me like you're dying to."

"This is wrong," Lupin's fingers deftly unzipped Draco's pants, his eyes turning a brilliant shade of yellow-like the full moon. "So wrong," he repeated, sliding Draco's trousers past his hips, exposing the engorged flesh, all inhibitions vanishing and-

A scream pierced through the house, the sound so horrifying full of pain and anguish. "HARRY!" Hermione's panicked cry splits through the silence of the house as the two men run towards into the room. Hermione was desperately trying to stop Harry from convulsing but the sheer magical force that Harry was emitting slammed her onto the floor.

"SHIT!" Draco motioned towards Lupin. "Don't let him move or else he could blow this entire fucking house up!" he bellowed, flicking his wand hastily, red bonds securing themselves tightly around Harry's arms and legs. "What the hell is causing this?"

Lupin shielded his head as a blast of energy from Harry sent several objects flying through the air. "Harry's connected to Voldemort. There could still be a vast amount that we don't know that's contained within Harry's body as a direct result of his and Voldemort's bond!"

"So that means that we have no bloody clue!" Draco snapped, ignoring the gash on his cheek as blood trickled past his jaw and landed on Harry's shoulder. "I don't think we can take much longer!"

As soon as it began, it ended, and Harry sank lifelessly back onto the bed. "He has a pulse," Lupin checked, glancing around the room at the damage. "I would say it's highly likely that the cause of Harry's outburst was Voldemort. He must have seen something that seriously angered him."

"Maybe it was Tom," Hermione frowned, voicing what the others were thinking. "But I hope I'm wrong for once."

Lupin and Draco agreed quietly.

***

"You will not defy me!"

He was brutally thrown against a wall, his back landing with a sickening thud against the stone. The air in his lungs was expelled forcefully and his vision went blurry. "Do it!" Voldemort snarled, "Or I will," he pointed his wand at several cowering Muggles. "And it will not be merciful."

Tom shuddered, desperately not looking at the woman with her three children huddled close to her, tears in her eyes as she silently pleaded with Tom to spare her. Tom achingly stood wit his wand in his outstretched hand. The woman's eyes closed and she whimpered in fear. The children-the oldest couldn't have been more then nine-began to sob. _I can't do this_, Tom's hand began to tremble.

"CRUCIO!" Voldemort yelled, the four Muggles writhing uncontrollably on the ground, their pain laden screams filling the night. "CRUCIO!" Another Unforgivable flew through the air and struck them again, and again, and again. "They will die slowly, my young protégé, and their final moments will be filled with terror."

_I'm sorry, _he whispered, wand pointed directly at them. "Avada Kedavra!" he commanded, the blinding green light enveloping them, instantly ending their torture. Tom's stomach coiled nauseatingly but he would not let Voldemort see how it affected him. The mother and her children were nameless faces that would be burned in his mind forever.

Tom would never forgive himself.

* * *

Poor Tom! That's what Harry saw that caused his powers to blow up like they did.

It's almost finished. Yay. ^_^


	25. Chapter 25

Title: On This Cross

Author: Shiny Ryuichi Sakuma

Pairings: Tom Riddle/ Harry Potter

Disclaimer: Not Mine

Notes: I've updated after years of being silent. I apologize profusely for my lack of updating. But I'm going to see this baby through to the end; of which, there will be three to five more chapters, depending. Please review, your devotion to this story has made me extremely happy and would love to see you all support this story once again. Thank you!

Chapter 25

All he could see were those Muggles. Every time that he closed his eyes, they were there. It shouldn't have bothered to the extremes that it did. Besides, this would have been his path had he taken it. That meant that the killer's desires still resided in him, didn't it? Voldemort had told him just as much. That he couldn't escape his natural affinity towards killing. Was he right? Was there no escaping his fate when it had been carved in stone? And that the proof of it was standing in front of him, a master of death, an immortal being that had accomplished the impossible. But it had felt wrong. It shouldn't have if he were already a damned soul.

"You should not go against the Dark Lord's orders," Snape's voice floated through the pitch black room. The light flaring from the tip of his wanted covered the room in shadows, partially obscuring the Death Eater's face from view. "He will make your life unbearable."

"Has he done that to you?" Tom asked, raising his head from his hands to look at Severus.

Snape's face remained impassive. "I hardly think that it's necessary to tell you tales about my connection to the Dark Lord. I'm the only one that you can trust here. And I know that trust doesn't come easy for you, Riddle. But Potter would have you believe in me."

Tom laughed, "From what I've heard _you_ were the one to kill Albus Dumbledore. Harry hates you just as much as he hates Voldemort. How can you possibly say that Harry would want me to put my faith in _you_?"

"Perhaps one day the true story of that day will come to light," Severus sighed, looking years older then he actually was, "And everyone will understand my involvement in this War. But I did not come here to discuss this with you. Potter's awake."

"He is?" Tom asked, cursing his voice for betraying his eagerness.

"Yes. But we do not know how badly he's injured; physically or mentally. That is why you _must_ fight this. I fear that the repercussions, should you be drawn to his side, will be vast. That, maybe, Potter's psyche could not handle such a shock and that it might deter him in his fight against the Dark Lord."

_Easier said then done_. "You can guarantee me that Harry's safe?" Snape nodded. "If I…express interest in learning Voldemort's plans for me…would that provide ample time for Harry to recover and for the Order to form some sort of operation against Voldemort?"

"You cannot do that. I will not allow it," Snape snapped, disliking the utter defeat in those green eyes of Tom's. "If you give up and let yourself be seduced by his promises then you will never be yourself again. I had thought that perhaps you were a bit more intelligent then that."

"What am I supposed to do?" Tom hissed, abruptly standing on his feet. "I'm not going to just stand by and watch him torture Muggles just so he can test me! Yes, months ago I would have been more then delighted to follow Voldemort and do his bidding. But after everything that's happened…I'm not the person I once was. It makes me _sick_ to know that I killed innocents."

_So this is the what goes in your mind_, Severus thought, watching the inner struggle waging battle inside the young man. "And you feel that by becoming a devil, you're repenting for that sin? That you'll be forgiven?"

"You're not even listening to me. I'm doing this for Harry, for you, for everyone! If Voldemort's occupied with me then he'll have less time to-"

"Oh I understand, you bloody fool, but you're aren't exactly considering the outcome of this. What will Potter do when he discovers that his precious Tom Riddle's nothing but a mere puppet for the Dark Lord? When he makes the realization that he must fight you? That you hardly even remember your time together because your mind will be warped with nothing but visions of death and destruction?"

Tom turned his back on Snape, signaling that their conversation was finished. But before Severus could leave, he heard a wavering voice say to him, "I do not want my life to be taken by Harry. He would never forgive himself. Should it come to pass and I must eliminated…"

Severus frowned, "Yes, it will be taken care of," he answered Tom's unspoken question, wondering exactly what was going on in Tom's mind, exactly how those cogs were turning. _There must be a method to your madness. If not, I do not think that God can even save us._

* * *

"You need to eat," the last person that Harry expected to baby him was doing so-albeit with a glare and snarl that covered the other wizard's genuine intentions. "You lost a lot of your strength, moron, while you were running across Germany," Draco Malfoy rolled his eyes. "That and Remus won't allow me to hide away in a room while the Weasley's come visit you."

"If you actually talked with them and got to know them, you might actually like them," Harry snapped, wrenching the bowl of porridge from Draco's hands forcefully. "Instead of being a self righteous bastard that thinks-"

"Potter, _darling_, I'm so glad to see you're back to your normal self," Draco smirked, "I was beginning to wonder if you'd actually lost what little was left of your mind."

"Why do you keep calling him by his first name?" Harry interrupted, glancing at the werewolf lost in conversation with Hermione. "He…he's not someone that you can just play with, Malfoy. He's like a father to me and I won't stand by and just let you fuck with him because it's entertaining to you."

"…You wouldn't understand the exact nature of our relationship. We're common souls, you know, blackened hearts that have turned their backs on the world. It would make for a best seller if I ever wrote it down," he cheerfully winked at Lupin, laughing as the older man turned a few shades of pink before looking away, "He's fun to tease."

"So you're…you're together, then?" Harry queried, already knowing the answer but dreading it nonetheless. Ever since he'd woken from his days of rest, ever since he'd seen... Harry shook his head, trying to shake that image from his head. Voldemort had used his mind against him once, he wouldn't let that happen again. _Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. _If only he knew that Tom was safe, that he wasn't being used by that son of a bitch, that he…that he hadn't forgotten him.

"And then I bent him over your bed while you were sleep-Ah, finally paying attention huh?"

"You did what?" Harry dead-panned, looking at Malfoy like he'd grown another head.

"I was going to answer your question but you spaced out. What's going on? Is it about that vision you had?"

Harry nodded, sitting his bowl on the table beside him. "I know that he can't say no because then Voldemort would probably just kill him. I have an unsettling doubt in my heart that's telling me that Tom's in danger. Maybe not for his life. But for his soul."

"In the end, isn't that the last, great battle everyone faces?" Draco asked rhetorically, flopping down onto the bed, staring at the ceiling. "I wonder…is it too late to save my soul?"

"You're thoughtful insights are beginning to make me suspect that you've been Imperiused by Hermione," Harry scowled, throwing the blankets off of him as he stood. He stretched the kinks in his bed ridden muscles. "Draco, will you come with me? To save him?" Harry asked, tone completely serious, fierce determination hardening his face.

Draco rolled his eyes, "As if you even had to ask me. You only have to tell me when and I'll be with you. To the very end."

Harry ignored the sudden rush of affection he felt towards the blonde, once his better enemy, now a trusted ally. Someone, that a few months ago, he wouldn't have thought twice about attacking. "I think I'm going to reason with the Order. I know that I can't do this alone."

"I hate to put a damper on your plans, Harry, but I don't think the Order's going to listen to you," Hermione said, smiling apologetically at her eavesdropping, "Apparently Remus has already tried to reason with them but they aren't interested in what he has to say."

Draco shook his head in disbelief, "Do those morons not realize that instead of one Dark Lord, there's the possibility of _two_? Look, I know that we don't want to think about Tom being seduced by Voldemort's promises of power but we can't turn a blind eye to it either. There's a chance that when we go to fight, Tom might be against us. And the longer we wait, the higher that chance. I say we just fuck the goddamned Order, assemble an elite task force, and take those bastards out ourselves."

"I can't believe I'm about to say this. But I agree with Draco," Hermione said, sighing, "We can't procrastinate on the issue. I'm sure that we could form a group to travel to Germany. The Death Eater's might outnumber us but I'm confident that we can overpower them."

"Then it's agreed. We leave at dawn. One of us will have to stay behind in order to contact our friends, to make sure that we're all assembled together. We'll make a port key, leaving one half of with whichever one of us remains here."

"I'm going," Draco imputed stubbornly, jaw set in defiance, "I know spells that even _you_ don't know, Hermione."

"Ha, I doubt that," Hermione tossed her hair behind her shoulders, "I'll have you know that-"

"I'll stay," Remus's voice interrupted the beginnings of the argument, lithe frame leaning against the doorway, "I have connections that you don't. I swear, in a couple of days, you'll have an army. We'll save him, Harry. And end this war once and for all."

"Remus, I don't want you coming. You stay here. I'm not-" Draco protested, mouth covered by the werewolf's hand, muffling his words. Draco shot the older man a dangerous glare.

"I'm not meek or submissive. I can hold my own. Something, I think that you should remember."

Draco smiled wryly, "I can't stop being so over protective of you."

"Wow, you two are nauseatingly sweet," Harry made a face, "I'd much rather not imagine my father figure and ex rival bumping uglies. Back to the subject," he pointedly glowered at Draco and Remus, "It's decided that that Remus and those he can manage to convince to fight with us, will join us Friday. That gives us two days to reach the Black Forest."

"I can Apparate us as far as Berlin but we'll still have to cover a few hundred miles by foot," Hermione said, "We can use bottomless bags to pack everything we'll need."

"You think of everything, don't you?" Draco laughed.

Hermione ignored the blush mantling her cheeks, "Well someone has to."

Harry glanced at Remus, Draco, and Hermione; they'd become the closest thing to a family that he'd ever known. Funny, how war had the ability to form bonds so strong that nothing could shake them. One day, would they look back on these times of hardship? Reminisce about the ones that were lost? Would they tell their children about the hero's and the villain's? That is, if they survived.

"Why so sad, little boy blue?" Remus draped an arm across Harry's shoulders, pulling him into an embrace. "We'll make this happen, Harry. All of us are here for you. And here for Tom."

"Thank you," he meant it, hoping that the sincerity was in his voice. He couldn't imagine having to do this alone. Harry thought of Tom, knowing that Tom was by himself, odds stacked heavily against him. Tom usually held all the right cards but Harry wondered if Tom's luck was ending. And if Tom was dead, well, Voldemort would be unrecognizable when Harry was finished with him, regardless if they both died.

* * *

Tom's back slammed against the ground with a resounding _crack_ that knocked the air from lungs. "If you disobey me again, I'll leave your body for the vultures!" Voldemort snarled, betraying a strength that should've been absent for a man of his age. _At least, if he was a man, a mere mortal._ Tom rose to his feet, ignoring the way his knees were shaking, the way his ribs were protesting any movement. He knew several were broken, could feel them against his skin.

"Wouldn't that do more harm then good? Essentially, you're _me,_" Tom snapped, brushing the dirt from his shirt, making himself seem more in charge then he actually was. He knew he didn't have the upper hand in this situation, that a fight between them wouldn't bode well for him. "Which means, if I die… _you_ die."

Voldemort's grip on his wand lightened, eyes narrowing at Tom, "I can't die. I'm immortal. You should know that. Come on, _Tom_, you can't fool me. This game you're playing? You won't succeed."

Tom tutted, "I'm merely saving my own ass. Unfortunately for you, the laws of nature are against you. Not even you can escape it. By coming here, I've ripped a hole in the dimensions of time. Which means, that yes, if I die here, then you don't exist."

Voldemort hissed, wand slipping into the sleeve of his robe, "Go against my wishes again, _boy_, and we'll put your theory to the test. Severus, I want him bound. With no food or water. We'll see how long it takes to break his spirit."

"Yes, my lord," Severus said, but Voldemort had already disappeared. "I suppose it only stands to reason that the only one with the capabilities to get inside Voldemort's head, would be Voldemort himself. What you're doing is dangerous, Tom."

"You think I don't know that?" Tom scowled, Severus clamping his hands together with shackles, the bindings numbing his magic, "I'm buying myself time. Something, I don't think I have much of."

"You've lost weight," Severus' onyx eyes roamed Tom's body, the tattered clothes hanging limply off his frame, "You don't eat. You barely touch the water I bring you, mind you, at my own expense. I can't help if you aren't wanting to help yourself."

"Look, I'm not sure what's going to happen. Honestly, I don't know two shits about dimensional distortions. But I'm willing to bet that if I die, Voldemort dies. I don't see how the both of us have been able to exist simultaneously."

"Because he's not you. Not anymore. When he split his soul into those seven Horcruxes, he…" Severus shook his head, "You've sensed it. That's what your future would have been. How could you ever have been so stupid, Tom? Why'd you do that to yourself? Even… Back when he was recruiting twenty years ago, he was still human."

One of Tom's brows arched, surprised to see sadness in Snape's eyes. _He was in love with him. _The revelation was one that shocked Tom. Voldemort wasn't capable of anything akin to love or compassion. This monster didn't have the capacity to _feel_, let alone be affectionate. "That's why you stay," Tom stated, "As much as you hate him, you love him."

Severus glared darkly at Tom, "You don't know what you're talking about."

"Perhaps not but your fealty to Voldemort can't stem from fear. I don't think you're afraid to die. I'd say you've had your soul prepared for years. So if it's not fear, then what else could possibly make you remain here?"

"I was young. Childish. Immature. I was lured in like so many others by his charm. I became his prodigy. He was the first one to pay attention to me, that showed that he cared." Severus sighed, "It was too late that I realized I was only a puppet. I don't need your pity, Tom. And this conversation goes nowhere, do you understand? I don't even want Potter to know."

"I swear."

That night, Tom gratefully accepted the bland oatmeal and tasteless flatbread from Severus, latching onto the hope that he'd made himself not only an ally, but a friend. That even in the darkest of times, the light still managed to shine.

* * *

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